1. REVISING SUMMARIES Captain America: The Test

2. 1 ST STEP: CHECK FORMAT Captain America: The Test

3. DO YOU SEE THIS?

4. OR THIS? WILL APPEARANCE INFLUENCE CREDIBILITY?

5. 2ND STEP: CHECK CONTENT Captain America: The Test

6. REVISE TITLE  A title should suggest the content and tone for the reader.  A simple method to develop a title is a two part title. the general topic: the narrow topic  It should never be the assignment. Examples: Essay 1, Summary, Persuasive Essay  It should NOT be a complete sentence.  It should NOT be too broad, just the general topic.  It SHOULD BE narrow enough to suggest the content of the essay.

7. REVISE TITLE the general topic: the narrow topic Captain America: The Test Steven Rogers: His Test to become Captain America BUT NOT Captain America: The First Avenger Too broad – the summary is not about the entire movie. Summary Summary is the assignment Steven Rogers is tested. This title is a complete sentence.

8. 3RD STEP: CHECK MECHANICS Captain America: The Test

9. CAPITALIZATION  Wrong  Captain America: the first Avenger  The Doctor saw Steven.  The Dr. saw Steven.  Schmidt, who is a Nazi Doctor, is evil.  The Commander tossed the grenade.  Right  Captain America: The First Avenger  The doctor saw Steven.  Dr. Erskine saw Steven.  Schmidt, who is a Nazi doctor, is evil.   The commander tossed the grenade.  Then Commander Smith called attention.

10. IF YOU DON’T KNOW THE EXACT WORDS, USE INDIRECT QUOTES  When Erskine asked why Steven wants to go in the army, he replies “To stop bullies, not to kill people.”  When Erskine asked Steven if he wants to kill Nazis, he replies that he does not want to kill anyone; he wants to stop bullies.  When Erskine comes to talk to Steven, he asked the doctor, “Why was I chosen.”  When Erskine comes to talk to Steven, he asked the doctor why he was chosen.

11. QUOTES AND PUNCTUATION  Periods and commas go inside.  Erskine replied, “I supposed that is the only question that counts.”  Question marks (and exclamation points)  If the quote is a question, the question mark goes inside.  Steven asked, “Why me?”  If the quote is a statement within a question, the question mark goes outside.  Was it the captain who said, “He’s still skinny”?  Never use double end marks.  … skinny. ” ?

12. PUNCTUATION: APOSTROPHES Use apostrophes to show possession. Do not use contractions in formal writing. Do NOT use apostrophes to form plurals. NOT see’s BUT sees

13. CHECK FOR COMPLETE SENTENCES (FRAG)  That the serum would turn good to great and worse to worst.  While everyone struggles to climb the flagpole. Rogers stands back and observes.

14. CHECK FOR RUN-ON AND COMMA SPLICE (RO) (CS)  All the men began to start to climb the pole after a while they were told to stop. Rogers walks up to the pole after everyone moved away, and examines the pole he sees that there’s pin at the bottom he pulls the pin and the pole falls to the ground.

15. CHECK FOR RUN-ON AND COMMA SPLICE (RO) (CS)  All the men began to start to climb the pole. After a while they were told to stop. Rogers walks up to the pole after everyone moved away, and examines the pole. He sees that there is pin at the bottom. He pulls the pin and the pole falls to the ground. He gets the flag.

16. BE ACCURATE (X- OBVIOUS FAULT)  Dr. Schmidt makes Rogers life hard.

17. AVOID YOU Only use you if you are talking directly to me (this would be rare). Otherwise, use people, soldiers, students— whoever it is that the you represents.

18. AVOID BEGINNING SENTENCES WITH A FANBOYS CONJUNCTION  Yet, Dr. Erskine is looking at who the person is on the inside not out, which is why he wants Rogers.  So the general throws a grenade out into the group of soldiers where both Hodges and Rogers are exercising.

19. BROAD PRONOUN REFERENCE Error: Dr. Erskine is looking at the soldiers’ character, to what he is on the inside not out, which is why he wants Rogers. Correstion:  Dr. Erskine is looking at the soldiers’ character, to what he is on the inside not out. Erskine wants Rogers because he is a good person, who is honest and compassionate.  Or:  Dr. Erskine is looking at the soldiers’ character, to what he is on the inside not out. Erskine’s focus is why he wants Rogers.