1. How to revise your sentences so that readers can understand clearly. 碩一經 林烜立 碩一政 莊博鈞 碩一政 楊中天 碩一政 吳碩宸

2.  “Too Academic”: more difficult than it has to be.  A Misunderstanding of new researchers: “more complex sentence means higher value”

3.  17.2.1 Distinguishing Impressions from Their Causes  17.2.2 Subjects and Characters

4.  3a. If rain forests are stripped to serve short- term economic interests, the earth’s biosphere may be damaged.  3b. The stripping of rain forests in the service of short-term economic interests could result in damage to the earth’s biosphere.

5.  3a. If rain forests are stripped to serve short- term economic interests, the earth’s biosphere may be damaged.  3b. The stripping of rain forests in the service of short-term economic interests could result in damage to the earth’s biosphere.

6.  Underline the first 6~7 words  Perform two tests: 1. Are the subjects concrete characters, not abstractions? 2. Are the verbs specific or general?

7.  If the sentence fails to pass the test, you should revise it in these ways: Find the characters you want to tell a story about. If the actions of the characters are in nouns, change them in to verbs. Create clauses with your main characters and their actions.

8.  A character can be any concrete or abstract subjects.

9.  Don’t surround key abstraction with other abstract nouns.

10.  3c.If developers strip rain forests to serve short- term economic interests, they may damage the earth’s biosphere.  3d. If loggers strip rain forests to serve short-term economic interests, they may damage the earth’s biosphere.  3e.If Brazil strips rain forests to serve short-term economic interests, it may damage the earth’s biosphere.

11.  In what way can we make our readers follow and understand our sentences more easier?  Let they can begin each sentence with a character / idea that is familiar to them  It is because it was already mentioned or it comes from the context. 17.3 A Third Principle: Old before New

12. To diagnose: To revise:  Underline the first six or seven words of every sentence.  Have you underlined words that your readers will find familiar and easy to understand?  If not, revise.  Make the first six or seven words refer to Familiar Information.  Put at the ends of sentences information that your readers will find unpredictable or complex and therefore harder to understand. 17.3 A Third Principle: Old before New

13.  Some of the clearer sentences have Passive Verbs, and it`s different from the way we use in general writing.  In order to make your research easy to be accepted and understood, you have to make your sentences easy to understand. 17.4 Choosing Between Active and Passive

14.  Do your sentences begin with Familiar Information?  The Passive can move the older, more Familiar Information from the end of its sentences to its beginning.  The main function of the Passive: to build sentences that begin with older information.

15.  You can anticipate the principle for ending sentences:  If Familiar Information goes first, the newest, most complex information goes last.  EX: ….Familiar Information, …complex information. 17.5 A final principle: Complexity Last

16.  This principle is particularly important in 3 contexts: a new technical term a unit of information (long and complex) a concept (to develop in the following)

17.  ……the most important one is ASEAN. Indonesia, Malaysia, the Philippines, Singapore and Thailand formed ASEAN. The Association was trying to…..  ……the most important one is ASEAN. ASEAN was formed by Indonesia, Malaysia, the Philippines, Singapore and Thailand. The Association was trying to…..

18.  ….is nuclear power plant. The earthquake can damage nuclear power plant, and nuclear power plant may have the problem of……  ….is nuclear power plant. The nuclear power plant damaged by earthquake can result in the problem of…….