1. Bullying: A Decade After Columbine, What Has Changed? tt

3. Chuck Saufler School Counselor, Trainer Former head, Maine Project Against Bullying

4. The goals of bullying prevention 10 years ago: Reduce existing bully/victim problems among school children Prevent the development of new bully/victim problems Improve peer relations Improve school climate (Olweus Bullying Prevention Program) The focus was often rule enforcement and consequences for the aggressors.

5. Obstacles that existed 10 years ago and still exist: A clear definition of bullying – leading to confusing language in school policy and laws. Getting full commitment from all stakeholders. (aka “buy-in”) Requires that they participate in defining what will be done and have meaningful input.

6. Obstacles to BP Programs (continued) Time for training all involved – requires administrative support at the highest level and administrative behavior that says by example that this issue is important- administrators attending all training, introducing training as vital, and modeling positive actions. Staff and student training driven by staff and student survey data and other input.

7. Obstacles to BP Programs (continued) Sustaining the coordinating team and the initiative in the face of changing priorities and staff turnover. Responding to the different forms of aggression referred to as “Bullying.”

8. Bullying Prevention Work: Evolution Identify cruel behaviors and tell students to stop Tell targets what they should do to stop getting bullied Punish bullying youth until they stop. Help aggressive students change their behavior through relationship, consequences and reflection. Build positive social norms addressing equity and social justice and focusing on school culture improvement. From Stan Davis ©2008 www.stopbullyingnow.comwww.stopbullyingnow.com

9. The Goal of the Work Today: Improving student connection and bonding to school by improving school climate and culture while providing protection for targeted students and effective responses to peer aggression. “The Wingspread Declaration,” a 2004 synthesis of decades of research that supports this approach can be found online at the Journal of School Health website. http://www.jhsph.edu/wingspread/Septemberissue.pdf

10. The Focus of BP Work Today: Respect for all. Protect targeted youth. Empower students to take positive social action. Restore and maintain a sense of community by intentionally building and improving relationships through a restorative approach. ©Davis and Saufler 2009

11. Important Elements Acknowledging that peer aggression is a systems issue and that at the system’s center are 3 key relational sets: student/student, staff/student, and staff/staff. Recognizing that peer aggression is a relational issue that requires relational solutions. Peers are central to the solutions and must be included in the process of creating them. The focus is on changing peer norms and behavior – we are using peer produced data and student lead initiatives to change school culture. (social norms interventions)

12. Important elements of this work (continued) At the heart of the work is climate and culture change informed by research from education, the social sciences and neurology. Using brain research on stress and its effects on learning and memory to get buy-in from staff and create effective interventions.

13. Important elements of this work (continued) Identifying local biases that contribute to the marginalization of certain groups or individuals – these biases create local norms that make acceptable, aggression toward certain individuals based on social status or class, looks, personality, and personal traits (weight, height, race, sexual orientation, gender identity, handicap, etc.). Use surveys (students, parents, teachers) to identify which biases need attention.

14. Important elements of this work (continued) Framing this work as human rights and social justice issues and involving students and parents in ongoing discussions of these issues. Helping bystanders understand their role in school culture and helping them find safe actions to take on behalf of the targeted students. Using a restorative approach to build and maintain a sense of community.

15. The Restorative Approach Is a philosophy or guiding principle (not a program or specific activity) that sees relationships as central to learning, growth and a healthy school climate for students and adults. For more information on restorative practices see: www.iirp.org

16. Announcement Stan Davis (author of Schools Where Everyone Belongs and Empowering Bystanders in Bullying Prevention) and Dr. Charrise Nixon (Penn State Erie and Ophelia Project) are looking for schools (grades 5-12) interested in helping them compile research data on which actions have been most effective for targeted students at school when being treated badly. More information can be found on Stan’s website at www.stopbullyingnow.comwww.stopbullyingnow.com Click on Youth Voice Project.

17. Patti Agatston School Counselor, Cobb County, Ga. Co-author, Cyber Bullying: Bullying in the Digital Age tt

18. Cyber Bullying Defined “Bullying through e-mail, instant messaging, in a chat room, on a website, or through digital messages or images sent to a cell phone.” — Kowalski, Limber & Agatston, 2008

19. CDC Issue Brief on Electronic Aggression and Youth 9 to 35% of youth have been the victim of electronic aggression 4 to 21% report perpetrating electronic aggression Between 7% and 14% report being both a target and a perpetrator From 2000 to 2005 there was a 50% increase in the number of targets

20. Teen Perceptions of Cyber Bullying (Cox Communications, 2009) % strongly/somewhat agree BoysGirls Bullying online is a serious problem with today’s youth. 60%76% If someone is caught bullying online there are serious legal consequences. 45%54% There should be stricter rules about online bullying 70%80%

21. Cyber Bullying and “Traditional” Bullying Similar characteristics: Aggressiveness Power imbalance Repetitiveness

22. Cyber Bullying and “Traditional” Bullying Different characteristics: Anonymity Disinhibition Accessibility Punitive fears Bystanders

23. Relationship Between Cyber Bully Status & Traditional Bullying Experience (Kowalski & Limber, in submission) Cyber Bullying Status Traditional Victim Traditional Bully Victim61%39% Bully39%55% Bully/Victim64%66% Not Involved 33%25%

24. Focus Group Themes Few parents and educators are talking with children about cyber bullying. When asked if parents are talking to them about cyber bullying, students primarily share messages about internet safety. — Kowalski et al., 2008

25. What Can Educators Do to Address Cyber Bullying?

26. 1. Incorporate Into Existing Bullying Prevention Programs Include cyber bullying prevention messages into school-wide bullying prevention efforts.

27. 2. Assess Cyber Bullying Use an anonymous questionnaire to determine prevalence. Look for age and gender trends. Collect more detailed information in informal group discussions.

28. 3. Provide Staff Training All staff should be familiar with the basics. In-depth training for key staff – Administrators – Counselors – Media specialists

29. 4. Develop Clear Rules and Policies About Cyber Bullying Incorporate into existing “student use of technology” policy and bullying policy for your school district. Distribute information about the policy to staff, parents, students.

30. 5. Encourage Reporting of Cyber Bullying

31. 6. Spend Class Time on Cyber Bullying Incorporate discussions into class meetings on bullying & peer relations. – What is cyber bullying? – What are the schools’ rules? – How to respond to cyber bullying? – Bystanders and cyber bullying – Online “netiquette,” safe blogging, monitoring reputations online

32. Cyber Bullying Prevention Curricula for Grades 3-5 & middle/high school Available through cyberbullyhelp.com

33. 7. Use Students as Experts Youth are more knowledgeable than many adults. Youth involvement sends an important message.

34. 8. Build Strong Parent/ School Partnerships Host parent programs at the school on cyber bullying. Post information on your school website. Send home printed materials on cyber bullying for parents. Have a contact person at the school who is knowledgeable about cyber bullying and can assist parents with their concerns.

35. Eliza Byard Executive Director, Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network (GLSEN)

36. At your school, how often are students bullied, called names or harassed for? % Very Often/Often Source: “From Teasing to Torment,” GLSEN/Harris Interactive, 2005. Current Situation In U.S. Schools

37. Experiences of Harassment & Assault Source: NSCS, GLSEN 2007 Sexual Orientation Gender Identity Sexual orientation and gender expression were the most commonly targeted characteristics.

38. Impact: Absenteeism Source: GLSEN, NSCS 2007

39. Impact: Academic Achievement Source: GLSEN, NSCS 2007

40. Source: GLSEN, Shared Differences 2008 Impact: Academic Achievement

41. Interventions: Supportive Educators Source: GLSEN, NSCS 2007

42. How many students said that school staff intervened “always” or “most of the time” when hearing anti-LGBT remarks at school? a.Less than 10% b.About half c.All (100%) d.About a fifth (20%) Interventions: Supportive Staff

43. Interventions: Safe School Policies Source: GLSEN, NSCS 2007

44. Interventions: Presence of GSA’s Source: GLSEN, NSCS 2007

45. Interventions: Inclusive Curriculum Source: GLSEN, NSCS 2007

47. Rosalind Wiseman Author, speaker, trainer Queen Bees and Wannabes

48. Students’ Recent Questions If you were from another country and kids were making fun of you, what would you do? What happens when boys on your bus keep doing things and I tell the bus driver but he doesn’t do anything? If someone was mean to you earlier in the year and you see them getting made fun of now, what should you do? When is the right time to tell on a bully and who do you talk to? If I were a bystander and the bully told me not to or else I would get beat up, what should I do? What if your best friend is the bully and they don’t even know it? What do you do when your mom throws up everyday after school? Will I always be the loser reject?

49. When Does It Start? Studies indicate children at four and five years of age can associate purposeful manipulation and damage to relationships with social prominence (BYU study 2005) They are “controversial” children. They are perceived by their peers as more sociable and more aggressive. “They are good resource controllers, socially skilled, popular, conscientious, socially integrated and yet are among the most aggressive, dominant, arrogant, children in the peer group. This bi- strategic mix or positive and negative behavior allows them to maintain their standing in the social hierarchy.” (Hart, BYU 2005)

50. The Research Research shows that repeated bullying is associated with negative school outcomes such as absenteeism and poor academic performance. Prevention Researcher Volume 11 #3 2004 Aggressive victims will internalize the continuous victimization until they can no longer cope. Once they have reached their limit they resort to violence i.e. Shooting a gun, starting a fire, or becoming bullies themselves. Others may smoke cigarettes, drink alcohol, and use drugs. Olweaus. The most recent and compelling research on bullying indicates we need to intervene on many levels simultaneously. Bullies, victims, bystanders, school personnel, and parents. ASCA, 2008 “The Buzz on Bullying”

51. The Terms Relational Aggression: The intent to harm others through purposeful manipulation or damage to their peer relationships (Crick 1995). Direct aggression (hands over ears, calling names etc.) Indirect aggression (exclusion, rumor spreading) Direct Aggression is dominant until approximately eight years of age. As brain capacity increases (memory, perspective, etc) indirect aggression becomes more common.

52. Used with Permission Center for Research on Girls, Laurel School Social Aggression Across Ages ChildrenTeensAdults Threatens to end friendshipsGossipOpenly dismisses other’s opinions or work Huddle togetherRolls eyes, laughing, dirty looks Steal boyfriend or girlfriend Refuses to listen by covering ears Ignores/silent treatementReduce or increase work responsibilities Threatens to not invite to social events Rumor spreadingPretend to be hurt to make other feel guilty Creates secret languageEmbarrass in public/practical jokes Reduces the other’s ability to express opinions Creates exclusive clubsBecome friends with another as revenge Say something hurtful that appears rational

53. School and the Family While children first learn about social hierarchies and develop social skills within a family, it is the school setting that provides the first significant experience for most children with respect to negotiating social rules, expectations, hierarchies, and conflicts in large groups. (Relational Aggression in Children and Adolescence, Univ. of Oregon, 2006)

54. Psychosocial affect of RA on targets – Confusion and denial – Psychological pain – Fear and anxiety – Efforts to escape situation or retaliation – Don’t “Gender” RA

55. Teasing Teasing: Personal information is used as a positive reflection of the relationship. Unintentional bad teasing: Personal information is used. It transgresses a boundary but teaser doesn’t know. Bad teasing: Personal information is used to embarrass, humiliate, or dismiss. Teasing is relentless and often strategically public. If target complains, they are ridiculed or threatened with end of friendship.

56. Want to Reach Me? Rosalind Wiseman: rosalind@rosalindwiseman.comrosalind@rosalindwiseman.com 202.545.0633 rosalindwiseman.com Facebook: Search “Rosalind Wiseman” and join my Page YouTube: Search “Rosalind Wiseman” and subscribe to RPW Channel Twitter: www.twitter.com/rosalindwisemanwww.twitter.com/rosalindwiseman Webinars: October 20th, November 16th

57. Julia Taylor School Counselor, Wake County, N.C. Author, Presenter

58. Gender Differences in Aggression Girls bond more intimately with other girls. Boys form social bonds through group activities. Trauma is isolation for girls. Smothering is trauma for boys. Girl talk on the playground. Boys play on the playground. Girls are socialized to be “nice.” Boys are socialized to be “tough.” When girls become troubled, they get sad. When boys become troubled, they get mad. (c) 2009, Julia V. Taylor, All Rights Reserved

59. Relational Aggression (RA) RA is simply defined as any behavior that is intended to harm someone by damaging or manipulating relationships with others. (c) 2009, Julia V. Taylor, All Rights Reserved

60. Possible Effects of Relational Aggression (c) 2009, Julia V. Taylor, All Rights Reserved RA School Refusal Family Fights Poor Self- Image Anxiety Depression School Shootings Physical Fights Lower Grades

61. Is Any of This Normal? Conflict is a part of every child's life experience. As children learn about cooperation and social interaction, conflict naturally occurs. A common response to frustration is rejection. Aggression and hurtful remarks are part of conflict at all ages; they do not necessarily mean that a problem exists. (c) 2009, Julia V. Taylor, All Rights Reserved

62. MOST KIDS CANNOT COMPREHEND THE THINGS THAT DO DAMAGE IF THAT DAMAGE CAN’T BE SEEN BY THE NAKED EYE. (c) 2009, Julia V. Taylor, All Rights Reserved

63. Who Me? RELATIONAL AGGRESSION IS VERY HARD TO PROVE! There has been little/no intervention on behalf of some schools. No blood, no bruises, no classroom disruption – where is the evidence? Lack of intervention escalates just like it would if nobody intervened with physical fighting. Parents often refuse to accept their child was punished for spreading a rumor. “NOT MY CHILD.” (c) 2009, Julia V. Taylor, All Rights Reserved

64. How Educators Can Help Having a safe school depends on YOUR SCHOOL and what they choose to react to or ignore. If a student comes to you because she is being harassed, please don’t minimize it. Listen, offer for them to come and talk to you, and help them cope! Try not to tell them “It’s going to be OK”, “Don’t worry about it”, or “You won’t remember this when you are 18”. Those types of comments invalidate every “valid” feeling they have. (c) 2009, Julia V. Taylor, All Rights Reserved

65. How Educators Can Help Don’t hang up “class rules/policies” unless you always enforce and follow them. Think about what you want for your students. Do you want your students to go home crying because they are afraid of school? YOUR CLASS? Be a role model! Lunchtime and hallway breaks are often ideal times for faculty to gather and “gossip” themselves – practice what you preach. (c) 2009, Julia V. Taylor, All Rights Reserved

66. How Educators Can Help Understand physical fights usually are perpetuated and begin with things adults consider “petty.” Issues surrounding bullying/relational aggression negatively affect daily academic performance. Never dismiss a report of cruel, unethical behavior – no matter how minor it seems. Know when to intervene (c) 2009, Julia V. Taylor, All Rights Reserved

67. The STOP Method Is the relational aggression Severe Traumatic Ongoing, or involve a Power struggle? If so, you have a duty to intervene! (c) 2009, Julia V. Taylor, All Rights Reserved

68. Creating a Policy Clearly define relational aggression Name the policy Provide a mission statement What is the rationale How/when will you intervene What are the possible consequences? 1st offense? 2nd? (c) 2009, Julia V. Taylor, All Rights Reserved

69. Consequence Suggestions for Administration After the student has written a statement, admitted everything, and/or if you have confiscated a horrific note — have the student call their mother or father and read it … every word. Take away privileges where they display social power. In/out of school suspension. Research RA – write a paper about it and enlist students to volunteer to teach a class about it (great for 4th and 5th graders to do with K-2). (c) 2009, Julia V. Taylor, All Rights Reserved

70. In Conclusion “Give a man a fish, he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish, he will eat for a lifetime.” Chinese Proverb (c) 2009, Julia V. Taylor, All Rights Reserved

71. NSBA Statement on Bullying Congress is interested in the bullying issue and conducted a joint hearing of two House Education and Labor Subcommittees in July 2009 called “Strengthening School Safety through Prevention of Bullying.” NSBA submitted a Statement for the Record to the joint hearing stating unequivocally that students must have safe and supportive climates and learning environments that support their opportunities to learn and that are free of abuse, violence, bullying, weapons, and harmful substances including alcohol, tobacco, and other drugs. NSBA recommendations to the Subcommittees, include full funding for the Safe and Drug Free Schools Program, creating a clearinghouse of best practices, providing technical assistance to local school districts, supporting a research agenda targeted to reducing and eliminating incidents of bullying, and prohibiting additional regulation or reporting that has no direct impact on the reduction or elimination of incidents of bullying. Statement for the Record Congress is interested in the bullying issue and conducted a joint hearing of two House Education and Labor Subcommittees in July 2009 called “Strengthening School Safety through Prevention of Bullying.” NSBA submitted a Statement for the Record to the joint hearing stating unequivocally that students must have safe and supportive climates and learning environments that support their opportunities to learn and that are free of abuse, violence, bullying, weapons, and harmful substances including alcohol, tobacco, and other drugs. NSBA recommendations to the Subcommittees, include full funding for the Safe and Drug Free Schools Program, creating a clearinghouse of best practices, providing technical assistance to local school districts, supporting a research agenda targeted to reducing and eliminating incidents of bullying, and prohibiting additional regulation or reporting that has no direct impact on the reduction or elimination of incidents of bullying. Statement for the Record

72. What’s Coming? Webinars 2 p.m. Thursday, September 24: Facilities, green schools and stimulus funds 2 p.m. Thursday, October 8: STEM and the emphasis that science and math skills are getting from local classroom to the halls of Congress. ASBJ’s Magna Awards Apply for the 2010 Magna Awards, a national recognition program that honors school districts for outside-the-box programs that result in improved student achievement. The awards program is FREE, and you can apply online only through October 31. Go to www.asbj.com/magna.www.asbj.com/magna Webinars 2 p.m. Thursday, September 24: Facilities, green schools and stimulus funds 2 p.m. Thursday, October 8: STEM and the emphasis that science and math skills are getting from local classroom to the halls of Congress. ASBJ’s Magna Awards Apply for the 2010 Magna Awards, a national recognition program that honors school districts for outside-the-box programs that result in improved student achievement. The awards program is FREE, and you can apply online only through October 31. Go to www.asbj.com/magna.www.asbj.com/magna

73. About the American School Board Journal is the award-winning education magazine published monthly by the National School Boards Association. Founded in 1891, ASBJ chronicles change, interprets issues, and offers readers practical advice on a broad range of topics pertinent to school governance and management, policy making, student achievement, and school leadership. For more information on the magazine and to subscribe either in print or online, visit www.asbj.com.www.asbj.com American School Board Journal is the award-winning education magazine published monthly by the National School Boards Association. Founded in 1891, ASBJ chronicles change, interprets issues, and offers readers practical advice on a broad range of topics pertinent to school governance and management, policy making, student achievement, and school leadership. For more information on the magazine and to subscribe either in print or online, visit www.asbj.com.www.asbj.com

74. About the The American School Counselor Association (ASCA) helps approximately 25,000 school counselors guide their students toward academic achievement, personal and social development, and career planning to help today’s students become tomorrow’s productive, contributing members of society. ASCA developed The National Standards for School Counseling Programs and the ASCA National Model: A Framework for School Counseling Programs, which provide guidelines for designing and implementing comprehensive, developmental school counseling programs. ASCA also maintain ethics standards for school counselors and position statements addressing a variety of issues. For more information about ASCA, visit www.schoolcounselor.org. www.schoolcounselor.org The American School Counselor Association (ASCA) helps approximately 25,000 school counselors guide their students toward academic achievement, personal and social development, and career planning to help today’s students become tomorrow’s productive, contributing members of society. ASCA developed The National Standards for School Counseling Programs and the ASCA National Model: A Framework for School Counseling Programs, which provide guidelines for designing and implementing comprehensive, developmental school counseling programs. ASCA also maintain ethics standards for school counselors and position statements addressing a variety of issues. For more information about ASCA, visit www.schoolcounselor.org. www.schoolcounselor.org

75. About in demand events—innovative publishing—inspired professional development solution-tree.com Tel: 800.733.6786 Fax: 812.336.7790 Contact: Professional Development Department Email: pd@solution-tree.compd@solution-tree.com Solution Tree is a leading provider of educational strategies and tools that improve staff and student performance. For more than 20 years, Solution Tree resources have helped K–12 teachers and administrators create schools where all children succeed. Our in-demand summits, institutes, conferences, preconferences, and workshops are known for outstanding practical content, valuable takeaway tools, and world-class speakers. Solution Tree Press publications are researched-based and focus on essential school-improvement topics. We partner with authors who are not only leaders in their fields, but also provide customized, on-site professional development based on their published work. in demand events—innovative publishing—inspired professional development solution-tree.com Tel: 800.733.6786 Fax: 812.336.7790 Contact: Professional Development Department Email: pd@solution-tree.compd@solution-tree.com Solution Tree is a leading provider of educational strategies and tools that improve staff and student performance. For more than 20 years, Solution Tree resources have helped K–12 teachers and administrators create schools where all children succeed. Our in-demand summits, institutes, conferences, preconferences, and workshops are known for outstanding practical content, valuable takeaway tools, and world-class speakers. Solution Tree Press publications are researched-based and focus on essential school-improvement topics. We partner with authors who are not only leaders in their fields, but also provide customized, on-site professional development based on their published work.