Common Factors for Not Charging Little or no physical force. Relationship No corroboration Victim credibility Race
Legal Defenses to Sexual Assault Survivor consented. Someone else did it. It did not happen. Other – Rough sex – “Sexsomnia” – Did not mean to. – Business deal gone bad. – A “syndrome”.
Sexual Assault Sexual assault is anytime, anyone does anything of a sexual nature where there is not consent. Consent can not be given or withheld when one is drunk, or drugged. Consent Coercion Force MutualSelf-Centered Intimidate WelcomePressure Threaten DesirableDeceive Fear Stephen M. Thompson
COMMON CHARACTERISTICS OF RAPISTS “State” vs. “Trait” Premeditated – Stranger – rape. – Familiar – “score” Motives – Control/Power – Sexual Domination – Sexual Gratification
“NICE GUY”SEQUENCE Step Four – Pushes for “Score” Target consents Mutual Ends – Typically states he will call soon. – Disconnects Target does not consent. Pressures – Yes ….Ends – No……Step Five Stephen M. Thompson
At a party, you see someone trying to get an obviously drunk woman to go to his place and have sex with him. She is way past buzzed! TRAIN OF THOUGHT – They are both adults. – Can she consent if drunk? – Does he have more status? – Will he listen? – Is this my responsibility? – What should I do? OPTIONS – Do nothing, its not my business. – Discuss/distract initiator. – Get others to discuss/distract.. – Inform and engage targets friends to not allow separation. – Spill drinks. – Call police.
Phone Technologies Cordless and cell phone conversations can be intercepted using scanners Know the risks with new phone technologies like VoIP Understand the features of cell phones – auto answer, hands free, car mode Spyphones take this listening ability one step further Virtually all cell phones are equipped with GPS
Anonymizers Phone Spoofing Text Spoofing Assistive technologies
Text Message Spoofing Send text messages anonymously – FakeMyText.com – AnonTxt.com – TextMeNow.net – TextForFree.net – TheAnonymous .com
Global Positioning Systems (GPS)
COMPUTERS Information gained by subterfuge and illegal activity Information about ourselves we put out there
Spyware & Computer Monitoring Software program or hardware component that helps an unauthorized third party gather information about the user’s computer use without user’s knowledge or consent. Can control computer operations including freezing, shutting down, and restarting the computer. Newer versions can also make the computer talk!
Spyware & Computer Monitoring Can be encoded in an message, game, or Web site Very hard to detect! Symptoms: often none, they typically run in stealth mode so user never knows it’s installed.
PSYCHOLOGICAL AND EMOTIONAL Putting your partner down and making them feel bad about themselves. Mind games or making partner feel crazy. Telling “secrets” to others Ignoring or “silent treatment” POWER AND CONTROL IN DATING
VERBAL ABUSE Name calling Criticizing Publicly humiliating Put downs Embarrassments
DESTRUCTION OF PROPERTY Destroying personal effects (pictures, letters, clothing, gifts, etc.) Ruining belongings Defacing or causing damage to partner’s home or auto
THREATS, ANGER AND INTIMIDATION Using looks, actions, expressions or a loud voice to intimidate partner Smashing or throwing objects Threatening to leave partner or abandoning them in a dangerous place Threatening physical harm
JEALOUSY, ISOLATION, POSSESSIVNESS AND RESTRICTION OF FREEDOM Using jealousy as a sign of love instead of insecurity Controlling what partner does, whom partner sees/talks to, or where partner goes Refusing to let partner work or join activities/dropping by unexpectedly to “watch” activities Accusations of cheating on partner
ABUSE OF “PRIVELEDGE” Making all the decisions Going out with their friends, but not allowing partner that freedom Walking out on an argument and leaving partner Doing all the telephoning and expecting partner to be there
SEXUAL ABUSE Unwanted or uncomfortable touching Continued sexual advances after being told “no” Forced sex “Playful” use of force during sex Treating partner like sex object
PHYSICAL ABUSE Any attempt to hurt or scare partner physically Hitting Biting Hair pulling Grabbing Pushing Shoving Tripping Kicking Etc.
What does a healthy relationship consist of?
HONESTY & RESPONSIBILITY Not making excuses for your or your partner’s actions Admitting when you’re wrong Keeping your word Not cancelling plans EQUALITY IN RELATIONSHIPS
OPEN COMMUNICATION Being able to express your feelings or opinions Knowing it’s OK to disagree Saying what you mean and meaning what you say
INTIMACY Respecting your partner’s boundaries Respecting each other’s privacy Not pressuring your partner Being faithful
PHYSICAL AFFECTION Holding hands Hugging Kissing Sitting or standing with arm’s around partner Respectfully touching Respecting partner’s right to say NO Asking before acting
FAIRNESS AND NEGOTIATION Accepting change Being willing to compromise Working to find solutions acceptable to both partners Agreeing to disagree sometimes
SHARED RESPONSIBILITY Making decisions together Sharing or alternating costs on dates Doing things for each other Going places you both enjoy Giving as much as you receive
RESPECT Paying attention to partner – even when friends are around Valuing your partner’s opinion Listening to what your partner has to say
TRUST & SUPPORT Being supportive Knowing your partner likes you Wanting the best for your partner Offering encouragement Being OK with your partner having different friends
Men’s Role In SA Prevention Check Yourself View Sexual Aggression As A Men’s Issue. – Talk with other men about it – Do not be a inactive bystander – Educate Yourself Question Your Attitudes about Sex, Power, and Women Never Assume, Clarify! Be An Ally, Work With Women Check The Scene Stop participating in group behaviors that are Degrading, Violent towards women – No Zebras! Encourage more men to do the same Behavior of one reflects on us all.