1. Wednesday, September 24 Revising Content Writing Process Map

2. Process Activity: Revising Content Step 1: Read over your draft and mark each section or paragraph by the rhetorical goals that you were trying to accomplish. Step 2: For the content associated with each of your rhetorical goals, raise diagnostic questions to identify strengths and weaknesses. Step 3: Using your diagnostic questions and the "think-ahead" technique, evaluate strengths and weaknesses in your draft. Step 4: Brainstorm and apply different ways to reinforce the strengths and resolve the weaknesses you've diagnosed in your draft.

3. Diagnostic Questions for Revising Content 1. How successfully does the draft's content achieve the key rhetorical goals for the paper type and section?key rhetorical goals 2. How successfully does the draft's content meet the needs, expectations, and values of primary and secondary audiences as well as target populations for the research? 3. To what extent is the draft's content accurate and comprehensive in covering the research field? 4. How clearly are the writer's ideas expressed? 5. How well developed are the writer's ideas? 6. To what extent is the content conceptually unified within and across sections of the paper? 7. How convincing are the writer's arguments?

4. Diagnose the Content: Golay et al.Golay et al. 1. How successfully does the draft's content achieve the key rhetorical goals for the paper type and section?key rhetorical goals 2. How successfully does the draft's content meet the needs, expectations, and values of primary and secondary audiences as well as target populations for the research? 3. To what extent is the draft's content accurate and comprehensive in covering the research field? 4. How clearly are the writer's ideas expressed? 5. How well developed are the writer's ideas? 6. To what extent is the content conceptually unified within and across sections of the paper? 7. How convincing are the writer's arguments?

5. Diagnose the Content: Golay et al.Golay et al. 1. How successfully does the draft's content achieve the key rhetorical goals for the paper type and section?key rhetorical goals 2. How successfully does the draft's content meet the needs, expectations, and values of primary and secondary audiences as well as target populations for the research? 3. To what extent is the draft's content accurate and comprehensive in covering the research field? 4. How clearly are the writer's ideas expressed? 5. How well developed are the writer's ideas? 6. To what extent is the content conceptually unified within and across sections of the paper? 7. How convincing are the writer's arguments?

6. Diagnose the Content: Golay et al.Golay et al. 1. How successfully does the draft's content achieve the key rhetorical goals for the paper type and section?key rhetorical goals 2. How successfully does the draft's content meet the needs, expectations, and values of primary and secondary audiences as well as target populations for the research? 3. To what extent is the draft's content accurate and comprehensive in covering the research field? 4. How clearly are the writer's ideas expressed? 5. How well developed are the writer's ideas? 6. To what extent is the content conceptually unified within and across sections of the paper? 7. How convincing are the writer's arguments?

7. Diagnose the Content: Halton and Hu 1. How successfully does the draft's content achieve the key rhetorical goals for the paper type and section?key rhetorical goals 2. How successfully does the draft's content meet the needs, expectations, and values of primary and secondary audiences as well as target populations for the research? 3. To what extent is the draft's content accurate and comprehensive in covering the research field? 4. How clearly are the writer's ideas expressed? 5. How well developed are the writer's ideas? 6. To what extent is the content conceptually unified within and across sections of the paper? 7. How convincing are the writer's arguments? Johnston et al.

8. Student Draft A study on the effects of carbohydrate-restricted diets on exercise in obese persons is necessary for assessing the value of low carbohydrate restricted diets. Exercise is associated with proven health benefits, such as improved cardiovascular health, improved utilization of fatty acids, and increased insulin sensitivity, which are all important for obese individuals who are at greater risk of heart disease and diabetes (5). But, if the mechanisms that cause weight loss in low carbohydrate diets impede exercise or even make exercise a potentially dangerous activity, then the value of such diets would need to be reevaluated. Present research provides a very unclear idea of how studies on obesity and exercise would turn out. Helge's (4) study on untrained individuals indicated that a high fat diet would not be as effective as a high carbohydrate diet at improving endurance performance. Though performance may be a measure of diet and exercise success, it isn't necessarily important to the issue of weight loss in obese individuals. If the diet and exercise regime reduced overall body fat composition and decreased disease risk factors then such a diet might be of some value. Helge's (4) study showed that subjects on a high fat diet had significantly lower insulin levels than those on the carbohydrate based diet. Subjects on the high fat diets also had higher free fatty acid profiles (4). Depending on the interpretation this could be seen as a positive or detriment to the high fat diets. Some interpret higher free fatty acids as a risk factor. Others see it as a result of increased fatty acid metabolism. Lambert's study involved cyclists on the more standard high fat diets. With highly trained athletes and a diet that conformed more to the standard high fat diet, Lambert found improved endurance among the cyclists on the high fat diet, further encouraging the idea that the high fat diet could potentially improve exercise capacity in obese individuals (6). Because Lambert used trained individuals, the value to exercise among the obese is limited. Highly trained individuals not only have superior basal metabolic rates but they metabolize fats better as well (5).