1. Cornerstone: Discovering Your Potential, Learning Actively, and Living Well, 5e Sherfield, Montgomery, & Moody © 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458 All rights reserved. Online PowerPoints to accompanyCornerstone: Discovering Your Potential, Learning Actively, and Living Well Fifth Edition Robert M. Sherfield Rhonda J. Montgomery Patricia G. Moody

2. Cornerstone: Discovering Your Potential, Learning Actively, and Living Well, 5e Sherfield, Montgomery, & Moody © 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458 All rights reserved. CHAPTER THIRTEEN RELATE: A Celebration of People, Cultures, and Self CORNERSTONE: Discovering Your Potential, Learning Actively, and Living Well

3. Cornerstone: Discovering Your Potential, Learning Actively, and Living Well, 5e Sherfield, Montgomery, & Moody © 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458 All rights reserved. CHAPTER 13 OBJECTIVES This chapter can help you: Understand why relationships are importantUnderstand why relationships are important Develop a college communityDevelop a college community Learn about different culturesLearn about different cultures Appreciate other culturesAppreciate other cultures Manage conflictManage conflict Understand the components of cultureUnderstand the components of culture

4. Cornerstone: Discovering Your Potential, Learning Actively, and Living Well, 5e Sherfield, Montgomery, & Moody © 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458 All rights reserved. COMMUNITIES... Participate in common practices Participate in common practices Depend on one another Depend on one another Make decisions together Make decisions together Are a part of something larger Are a part of something larger Commit themselves to the well- being of the group Commit themselves to the well- being of the group

5. Cornerstone: Discovering Your Potential, Learning Actively, and Living Well, 5e Sherfield, Montgomery, & Moody © 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458 All rights reserved. RELATIONSHIPS WITH FAMILY Honesty is the best policy. Just remember the old quote, “Honesty without love is brutality.” Honesty is the best policy. Just remember the old quote, “Honesty without love is brutality.” Talk things out. Remember you have two ears and one mouth, use them in that proportion. Talk things out. Remember you have two ears and one mouth, use them in that proportion. Family is forever, whether it’s the one you were born into or the one you have chosen. Family is forever, whether it’s the one you were born into or the one you have chosen. The word spoken cannot be unspoken. The wounds your words may cause may last a lifetime, so choose them carefully. The word spoken cannot be unspoken. The wounds your words may cause may last a lifetime, so choose them carefully.

6. Cornerstone: Discovering Your Potential, Learning Actively, and Living Well, 5e Sherfield, Montgomery, & Moody © 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458 All rights reserved. SEEK NEW FRIENDS WHO… n Treat you well and equally n Have ambition and courage n Have a strong work ethic and good habits n Have pride in themselves n Enjoy college and learning n Are outgoing and adventurous n Are goal-oriented with a life’s mission

7. Cornerstone: Discovering Your Potential, Learning Actively, and Living Well, 5e Sherfield, Montgomery, & Moody © 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458 All rights reserved. TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS One person’s inability to function apart from the other One person’s inability to function apart from the other Blaming each other (or perhaps just one of you) for everything that is going wrong in your lives (life) Blaming each other (or perhaps just one of you) for everything that is going wrong in your lives (life) Using abusive language and/or trying to control through intimidation Using abusive language and/or trying to control through intimidation Using intimate knowledge of your weaknesses to hurt you or someone else Using intimate knowledge of your weaknesses to hurt you or someone else Using intimate knowledge to manipulate you or someone else Using intimate knowledge to manipulate you or someone else The use of physical violence or any controlling technique The use of physical violence or any controlling technique The use of sexual harassment The use of sexual harassment

8. Cornerstone: Discovering Your Potential, Learning Actively, and Living Well, 5e Sherfield, Montgomery, & Moody © 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458 All rights reserved. WHAT IS CULTURE? WHAT IS CULTURE? “Culture is a pattern of values and beliefs reflected in outer behaviors.” David Popenoe

9. Cornerstone: Discovering Your Potential, Learning Actively, and Living Well, 5e Sherfield, Montgomery, & Moody © 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458 All rights reserved. YOUR “CULTURE OF ONE” Upbringing Upbringing Race Race Nationality Nationality Where you live Where you live Education Education Religion (or lack of) Religion (or lack of) Friends and relatives Friends and relatives Experiences Experiences

10. Cornerstone: Discovering Your Potential, Learning Actively, and Living Well, 5e Sherfield, Montgomery, & Moody © 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458 All rights reserved. COMPONENTS OF CULTURE Symbols Symbols Language Language Values Values Norms Norms Sanctions Sanctions

11. Cornerstone: Discovering Your Potential, Learning Actively, and Living Well, 5e Sherfield, Montgomery, & Moody © 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458 All rights reserved. CULTURAL ADJUSTMENT In college, you are likely to find your values, beliefs, and actions changing as your horizons broaden. This is cultural adjustment.

12. Cornerstone: Discovering Your Potential, Learning Actively, and Living Well, 5e Sherfield, Montgomery, & Moody © 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458 All rights reserved. SLAMMING THE DOOR ON HATE Become knowledgeable about kinds of hate crimes and how to combat each type. Become knowledgeable about kinds of hate crimes and how to combat each type. Take a stand for decency. Take a stand for decency. Let the victim or victims know they are not alone. Let the victim or victims know they are not alone. When a hate group does something vicious, organize something to counteract their actions. When a hate group does something vicious, organize something to counteract their actions. Speak up in positive ways and get community business leaders and politicians involved in taking a stand against intolerance. Speak up in positive ways and get community business leaders and politicians involved in taking a stand against intolerance. Teach tolerance to young children. Teach tolerance to young children. Talk to friends who demonstrate intolerance through their actions, words, or jokes. Talk to friends who demonstrate intolerance through their actions, words, or jokes.

13. Cornerstone: Discovering Your Potential, Learning Actively, and Living Well, 5e Sherfield, Montgomery, & Moody © 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458 All rights reserved. CHAPTER REFLECTION Examine your personal values to determine if cultural adjustments are needed Examine your personal values to determine if cultural adjustments are needed Listen to people and try to understand them Listen to people and try to understand them Stand up against intolerance of any kind Stand up against intolerance of any kind Help others understand the importance of organizing against hate crimes Help others understand the importance of organizing against hate crimes Develop relationships with people from a variety of backgrounds Develop relationships with people from a variety of backgrounds Learn to appreciate differences Learn to appreciate differences Maintain close friendships Maintain close friendships

14. Cornerstone: Discovering Your Potential, Learning Actively, and Living Well, 5e Sherfield, Montgomery, & Moody © 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458 All rights reserved. JUST FOR FUN !! Character Illustration by Christian O’Brien