1. What To Do With The Child Who Only Says “NO” Rachel J. Valleley, Ph.D. Assistant Professor Munroe-Meyer Institute Nebraska Medical Center

2. Noncompliance Refuse to follow adult instructions Break rules Easily irritated or emotional when told to do something Blames others for their own mistakes These children need to learn important behavioral skills

3. Teaching Behavioral Skills What are behavioral skills? –Behaviors that society expects. –Behaviors that facilitate good relationships. –Prerequisites for any other skill.

4. Important Behavioral Skills –Infancy self-quieting, independent sleep –Toddler Independent play –Preschool anger control, rule-following, sharing –Elementary School Sitting quietly, following instructions –Adolescence negotiating, managing more independence

5. Teaching Behavioral Skills The Three Essentials: 1.Predictability –In your daily structure –In the consequences you provide

6. Teaching Behavioral Skills The Three Essentials: 1.Predictability –In your daily structure –In the consequences you provide 2.Practice –Break the new skill down to make it easy at first –Give lots of opportunities to try it (over and over) –Provide predictable feedback for success vs. failure

7. Teaching Behavioral Skills The Three Essentials: 1.Predictability –In your daily structure –In the consequences you provide 2.Practice –Break the new skill down to make it easy at first –Give lots of opportunities to try it (over and over) –Provide predictable feedback for success vs. failure 3.“Big Difference”

8. Teaching Behavioral Skills Big Difference: –Number one rule of childhood: If it is boring, make it interesting –Kids look to see how they impact the world –What is the number one impact/effect to children?

9. Teaching Behavioral Skills Generating an “effect” in the environment can be very reinforcing. Touch, Talk, and Look are all effects.

10. Teaching Behavioral Skills Creating a “Big Difference” Your consequence for demonstrating a skill appropriately should be VERY DIFFERENT than your consequence for demonstrating a problem behavior.

11. Teaching Behavioral Skills Problem #1 for Creating Contrast: –Not enough of a reaction for using the skill appropriately. Problem #2 for Creating Contrast: –Too much reaction for problem behaviors

12. Not enough of a reaction for using the skill appropriately. NO LEARNING

13. Too much reaction for problem behaviors NO LEARNING

14. Teaching Behavioral Skills WHAT ARE YOU DOING WHEN YOU SEE THE SKILL? Your Reaction

15. Teaching Behavioral Skills The Three Essentials: 1.Consistency 2.Repetition 3.High Contrast

16. Teaching Behavioral Skills Just as important to increase what you want as it is to decrease what you don’t want. TEACH ALTERNATIVE BEHAVIOR

17. Increasing the good 1. Encourage/increase appropriate behavior Differential Attention Child’s Game Sticker Charts/Grab Bag Prizes

18. Increasing the good Differential attention –Attend to average behavior –Praise exceptional behavior –Ignore behavior that you do not want

19. Increasing the good The Child’s Game: A relationship-building activity that makes children want to earn your POSITIVE attention.

20. Increasing the good DO –Describe –Reflect –Imitate –Praise –Touch DON’T –Command –Reprimand –Question

21. Increasing the good Sticker Charts/Grab Bag Prizes: –Daily for overall behavior –Magic circle chart –Dot-to-dot’s –Grab Bag Prizes

22. Getting more “Yes” Effective Commands: –Simple –Direct –One at a time –Start small –“Do” commands

23. Getting more “Yes” Bad Commands –“Don’t jump on the couch” –“Bring your bring your plate to the trash, scrap off all the food, rinse the plate in the sink and put it in the dishwasher.” –“Could you please turn off the T.V.” –“Watch out” –“I need you to pick up the toys because your mom will be here soon.”

24. Decreasing the “No” Compliance Training Time out

25. Decreasing the “No” Compliance training Give command, wait 5-10 seconds. If comply, praise. If not comply, give time out warning. If comply, praise. If still does not comply, time out. After time out, go back to original command and repeat until followed.

26. Decreasing the “No” What is time out? –Time out is the removal of attention, tangibles, or anything interesting to the child for a brief amount of time.

27. Decreasing the “No” Misconceptions and mistakes with time out –Not the chair –Have to sit quietly before time starts –1 minute per year –Think about what did wrong and feel sorry –Talking to child in time out –Not expecting extinction burst

28. Decreasing the “No” How to do Time Out: –Stop talking once told “Time Out” –Get to chair/spot with minimal guidance –Do not attend to anything in time out –Stay close enough to monitor but be aloof –Child serves 2-3 minutes –Let child out –Follow up with expecting appropriate behavior

29. Decreasing the “No” Common problems with Time Out –The child won’t go/stay in time out –The child does not seem to care that they are in time out –The child will not be quiet in time out –The child won’t get out of time out

30. How to teach behavioral skills in daycare Do Child’s Game with new children to build relationship while others napping Use dot-to-dot and compliance training practices for any new child or anytime you notice an increase in noncompliance Use time out predictably

31. How to teach behavioral skills in daycare Have grab bags for 2 or fewer time outs a day Use sticker chart for every good day and after X number of stickers, earn grab bag Set timer to cue giving frequent bursts to all those who are doing something okay

32. Summary of Teaching Important Behavioral Skills Predictability Practice Contrast Just as important to increase appropriate behaviors as it is to decrease inappropriate behaviors

33. Questions?