1. Brad Epsten, LSCSW Horizon Academy School Counselor Gerilyn Semro, MS, MS Horizon Academy Classroom Teacher Enhancing Social Skills in your Child with ADHD

2. Pressures on Social Competency  Sharing  Waiting your turn  Following rules  Impulsivity, Inattention Hyperactivity  Emotionally charged reactions  Lack cause/effect connection  Interrupting, personal space, delayed gratification  Social Cues Important skills of childhood social success: Challenges of ADHD:

3. Keys to Social Competency 1. Ability to join or enter a group. 2. Ability to establish and maintain friends. 3. Ability to resolve conflicts. 4. Ability to “tune in” to social skills.

4.  Multi-task  Energy reserves  Hidden Talents / Skills  Exciting to be around ADHD as a Strength:

5. Social Skills -How to Teach!  Use direct instruction  Verbal-Considerate, Non-Emotional  Non Verbal-reduces call-outs, visual cue  Use rehearsal  Use visuals for structure  Use comic strip / social stories  Use of video

6. Body Basics  Introduce yourself to person next to you.  Do this exercise again using Body Basics:  Stand up  Arms length distance  Firm handshake  Look other person in eye  Use pleasant tone of voice  Greet with name  Share reciprocal conversation

7. Social Detective Adapted from the work of Michelle G. Winner, Think Social by Beckham Linton M.A. CCC-SLP Speech Language Pathologist Social Detective Vocabulary Terms  Being a Social Detective means using our eyes, body and brain to observe and think about what other people are thinking and feeling at any given time. There are clues all around us that give us information about a situation that help us to know what is expected what is coming next, even in the stories that we read!  Keeping your brain and body in the group: Understanding that our bodies need to look interested and connected to the group and our brain needs to keep thinking about what the group is thinking in order to participate within the group. We also teach that people can see when your body or brain does not appear to be a part of the group.  Your body rolled out of the group: A students’ body is turned or physically moved away from the group and the others notice that the student is not working as part of the group.  Your brain rolled out of the group: A student’s brain is distracted from what the group is doing and the other people in the group notice that he/she does not appear to be working as part of the group, even if his/her body is in the group!

8. Social Detective Adapted from the work of Michelle G. Winner, Think Social Beckham Linton M.A. CCC-SLP Speech Language Pathologist  Doing what is “expected”: Understanding a range of hidden rules in every situation and we have to figure out what those rules are and then follow them in order to keep other people feeling good about you.  Figuring out other people’s plans: Determining what people are planning to do next based on their physical actions. We can also start to figure out what people are planning to do by interpreting the subtle meaning in their language; this is a higher level skill.  Whopping topic change: When a comment is made and the listener cannot determine the thread of information that connects this comment to what was previously said.  Map it Out!: The social behavior map is a tool for helping us learn how expected/unexpected behaviors make people around us feel, what the effects of these behaviors are and how they ultimately affect how we think and feel about ourselves. This mapping tool can be used either before, during or after any socially challenging situation to teach the basic concepts of social thinking.

9. Do’s & Don’ts for Fostering Social Competence by Richard LaVoie, M.A., M.Ed. Excerpted from the Teacher's Guide Last One Picked... First One Picked On Learning Disabilities and Social Skills with Richard Lavoie 1994 Please note the key at the end of each suggestion: P = appropriate for parent use T = appropriate for teacher use P/T = utilized by parents or teachers Do’s:  Observe your child in varied social situations (classroom, scouts, free play) to gain deeper understanding of social strengths and weaknesses. (P)

10. Do’s & Don’ts for Fostering Social Competence by Richard LaVoie, M.A., M.Ed.  Use signal system with child for awkward social situations or reminders. (P/T)  Reward system to promote appropriate social behavior. (P/T)  Group activities should match interests and abilities of child. Clean slate and effective instructors will increase success.(P)  Continually reinforce social information – look for teachable moments. (P/T)

11. Do’s & Don’ts for Fostering Social Competence by Richard LaVoie, M.A., M.Ed.  Encourage all family members to take an active role in supporting social learning and success and keep the narrative positive. Progress should be measured against oneself vs. others. (P)  Assist and scaffold transitions (reminders, countdowns, visual schedules, consistency, advance planners). (P/T)  Work on one behavior/skill at a time. (P/T)  Assist and allow child to appropriately express emotions during difficult social situations. (P/T)

12. Do’s & Don’ts for Fostering Social Competence by Richard LaVoie, M.A., M.Ed.  Teach an model empathy to raise awareness/understanding of others feelings (“walking in someone else’s shoes”). (P/T)  Use “real life”, tv shows, and movies as examples to teach social skills. (P)  Provide choices to foster independence, decision making skills and ownership of task. (P/T)

13. Do’s & Don’ts for Fostering Social Competence by Richard LaVoie, M.A., M.Ed.  Don’t discourage child from engaging friendships with younger children that may be more on their developmental level – build success. (P/T)  Don’t force child to participate in large groups if they are not comfortable or competent – start slow and build. (P/T)  Don’t place child in overly competitive situations - focus on participation, enjoyment, and skill building. (P/T)  Don’t assume child understood your verbal instructions – ask them to repeat. (P/T)

14. Do’s & Don’ts for Fostering Social Competence by Richard LaVoie, M.A., M.Ed.  Don’t teach social skills in high stress/emotional moment – approach when relaxed and receptive. (P)  Don’t expect punishment/negative reinforcement to have long term or meaningful impact on social skills deficit – positive reinforcement = more effective. (P/T)  Overuse of punishment:  Not learning appropriate behavior  Child can become passive and avoid social situations  Lead to lying, cheating, blaming  Adaptation to punishment

15. Do’s & Don’ts for Fostering Social Competence by Richard LaVoie, M.A., M.Ed.  Do use punishment for behavior:  Intolerable  Dangerous  Unaffected by positive discipline  How to use punishment:  Immediately after offending act  Consistently  With warning  Without emotion  Don’t take away earned reward

16. How Can We Help  Play dates- structure, advance planning, rules, 2 children/not 3, fade to background, end on good note  Practice, practice, practice – role-play, read, observe, social stories, model  Social Autopsies – post-event rehash to learn from mistakes and successes  Teach Conflict Resolution Skills  Entering into a conversation

17. How We Can Help  Make Lists (visual record)  Ask for Clarification  Both helper AND person w/ ADHD  Feedback loop  Praise when appropriate  Advanced preparation  10 second delay ADHD Interventions (cont’d):

18. How Can We Help  Dinner Table  Board Games  One-on-one time  Open dialogue (at the right time)  Non-judgmental  Encouraging support

19. What NOT to do: Don’t be the hovering parent Don’t intervene every time to prevent failure Don’t compare children Don’t use sink or swim approach

20. School’s Out!!! Some tips that have helped other families get through the summer adjustment: If your child requires academic exposure during the summer, try to keep it balanced with some recreation or high interest activity. Keeping some structure or routine during the summer can help students with the transition in schedules. Continue some academic work such as regular reading schedule. This can be facilitated with trips to the library and possible rewards of DVD rentals.

21. Summer Camps and Activities-2015 Local Camp/Activity Guides www.kcparent.comwww.kcparent.com – search on summer camps www.kckidsfun.com www.JCPRD.comwww.JCPRD.com – Over 40 professionally programmed and supervised camps and clinics throughout Johnson County. National Camp Guides www.kidscamp.com www.summercamp.org Programs in other states: www.campencourage.comwww.campencourage.com – high functioning spectrum disorders www.DurangoMountainCamp.comwww.DurangoMountainCamp.com – reading and dyslexia http://soarnc.org/soar-adhd-summer-camp/http://soarnc.org/soar-adhd-summer-camp/ - ADHD summer camp

22. Summer Camps and Activities-2015 Recommended Area Camps/Activities http://horizon-academy.org/summer-school/http://horizon-academy.org/summer-school/ -Horizon Academy - Individualized academic programs and specific academic clinics. https://www.joshuacenter.com/camper-home.htmlhttps://www.joshuacenter.com/camper-home.html - Neurological disorders, Asperger’s, OCD, Tourette syndrome www.campbarnabas.orgwww.campbarnabas.org – Camp Barnabas – high functioning Asperger’s and other health impairments http://www.barstowschool.org/podium/default.aspx?t=126046http://www.barstowschool.org/podium/default.aspx?t=126046 -330 camps: academics/arts/sports/technology http://www.pembrokehill.org/programs/summer-programs/index.aspxhttp://www.pembrokehill.org/programs/summer-programs/index.aspx -Pembroke Hill-academic/arts/rec-activities www.MyAnimalCamp.comwww.MyAnimalCamp.com – KC Cub Creek Science Camp – ages 7-17. www.mattierhodes.orgwww.mattierhodes.org – Summer Art Camps (daytime) www.WINforKC.orgwww.WINforKC.org – Camp Win for girls – Empowerment, fitness, and sports camp. www.speds.orgwww.speds.org – St. Paul’s Episcopal Day School Camp – Ages 3-13 www.nkccc.orgwww.nkccc.org – Summer Fun Camp www.paintglazeandfire.netwww.paintglazeandfire.net – Camp Artrageous – Art activities camp www.CultureHouse.comwww.CultureHouse.com – The Culture House – Drama camp www.OPChildcare.comwww.OPChildcare.com – Sky’s the Limit – Variety of activities for kids K-6. www.DramaKC.comwww.DramaKC.com – Theatre of Imagination—Performing Arts/Drama day camp. www.midnight-farm.orgwww.midnight-farm.org - equine programs www.TrilogyCulturalArts.comwww.TrilogyCulturalArts.com – Performing Arts Camp – Day and night camps offered. www.cpchmontessori.comwww.cpchmontessori.com – Outdoor classroom summer camp www.KCShakes.orgwww.KCShakes.org – Heart of America Shakespeare Festival camp www.merriam.org/parkwww.merriam.org/park -- Merriam Parks & Recreation Department daytime camps www.oakhilldayschool.orgwww.oakhilldayschool.org – Academic/tutoring courses, enrichment programs, art classes, field trips.

23. Suggested Reading  “Thinking About YOU Thinking About Me” by Michelle Garcia Winner  “It’s So Much Work to Be Your Friend” by Rick Lavoie  “How Rude! The Teenagers’ Guide to Good Manners, Proper Behavior, and Not Grossing People Out” by Alex J. Packer, Ph.D.  “Jarvis Clutch-Social Spy” by Mel Levine, M.D. and Jarvis Clutch  “The New Social Story Book” by Carol Gray