1. Relationships What are they?

2. Questions to do with Relationships What is a relationship? How do relationships form? Why do you not have a close relationships with everyone you meet? Why do some relationships break apart Why do some relationships stay for a very long time?

3. relationships Why do we feel the need to form relationships with people? Personal interactions Feeling of belonging Sense of security Feeling of being loved or worthy People to do activities with Connection People can relate to you Experience new things with Every person we meet is another living breathing human being and we’re all in search of the same thing…happiness, the feeling of belonging and acceptance.

4. Different types of Relationships 1. Whirlwind – people you happen to meet in any given day that you find interesting and were able to engage in small talk. You may be on a trip and you talk to someone who you find interesting however knowing you won’t see them again. 2. Acquaintances – People you keep in touch with but don’t spend a lot of time with. You enjoy their company but rarely do you talk about anything deep or meaningful People you work with, team mates, neighbors, boss, classmates 3. Rocks – People who are there for you, your pillars, when things go wrong you can turn to them for help (unconditional help – they do not want anything back from you – “no strings attached”) These are hard to find and need to be treasured!

5. Finding and establishing meaningful relationships First establish what a meaningful relationship isn’t Look at some of the relationships you are currently in and answer the following questions. Does this relationship exist purely out of convenience? Are you filling a void for the other person? Is that other person filling a void for you? Is it a take, take and take some more relationship either on your part or theirs? Do you start to feel down about yourself when you are around them?

6. Second, define what a meaningful relationship is to YOU Look at the “Rocks” in your life and write out why these relationships are like that for you mutual respect mutual trust honesty good conversation (i.e. communication) patience thoughtfulness make you feel good, positive and uplifted

7. Reach out, find a commonality, be open, genuine and accepting. Get to really know someone, find common interests and get lost in a great conversation. Show love, give love and accept love is one of the best things you can do to form a relationship of deeper meaning that will last a long, long time. Next is the 5 stages of a relationship Next is the 5 stages of a relationship

8. 1. Acquaint the people on the periphery of your social circle, your co- workers, school mates, other team mates You see them at work, school or other events conversations are either shop talk or otherwise light and inconsequential. As a socially-adapted person, you can quickly reach this stage with just about anyone simply by being your naturally charming self and actually interacting with people.

9. 2. Build up increased level of trust and comfort with each other. It is possible to influence the decisions and actions of a coworker or school friend In order to preserve the relationship, it is important to act as a friend. Get to know the other person personally Engaging in abuse of the privileges of your friendship can easily and quickly lead to its degradation (stage 4). This phase takes the most consistent effort as it moves a relationship from acquaintance to continuation.

10. 3. Continue A deepening of trust and commitment to the relationship This is where you’ll reap the benefits of better communication, improved productivity and an increased satisfaction with work, school or activity. Increased effort to maintain the relationship at this level comes with the increased trust and influence. Without the increase in effort, the relationship is likely to start deteriorating (stage 4), leading to a return to the acquaintance or termination stages.

11. 4. Deteriorate Often a natural and necessary phase of relationships. No one works the same job forever or goes to the same school Circumstances frequently lead to a change in proximity between people, or even a change in the frequency of contact. Without paying special effort and attention to its maintenance, the relationship can revert back to an earlier stage in the personal relationship continuum. As one of the people involved in the relationship, it falls on you to consider the benefits and drawbacks associated with maintaining or allowing the relationship to lapse

12. 5. End As with deterioration, there is no need to let the End stage’s connotations influence your perception of this phase of relationships. It is extremely unlikely that you will remain in contact with everyone you meet throughout your entire life, and so termination will be a natural step in many of your workplace or school relationships.

13. Reflection questions What is the hardest part of forming a relationship or friendship with someone? In your past friendships, think about what made these friendships good? In your past friendships what was the problem with some of the friendships you had?