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Are you positive ? Dr. Declan Aherne Clinical Psychologist, Sports Psychologist and Psychotherapist. University of Limerick and Oakwood Psychological Services, Castletroy.
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Aim of this talk To learn how to promote confidence, as a necessary part of any prospective job seeker.
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A positive attitude Is what employers look for Is what makes an impression Is what will sustain you in your search
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On being positive Take stock of your talents : What are the three strongest talents that you have to offer an prospective employer.
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Crisis = danger + opportunity.
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FEAR OF SUCCESS ‘The Jonah Syndrome’ ( Maslowe) We fear our highest possibility. We are generally afraid to become that which we can glimpse in our most perfect moments. Why,because it takes courage.
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Confidence is due to How you think. What you focus on. How you react to events.
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Myths about confidence Only positive feedback can build confidence. Either you have it or you don’t Success always builds confidence Mistakes inevitably destroy confidence Confidence means outspoken arrogance
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Self-talk Your thoughts determine how you feel: Think negative – feel negative, anxious, self-doubt. Think positive – feel confident You need to listen to yourself- what do you tell yourself ?
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Mistaken beliefs Perfection is essential Catastrophizing Worth depends on achievement Fallacy of fairness and ideal conditions Blaming
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Typical Thinking Errors 1. All or nothing thinking e.g. if I don’t get this job, I’m no good. 2. Overgeneralising e.g. I’ll never get a job. 3. Dwelling on the negative e.g. my cv is limited. 4. Disqualifying the positive e.g. I was lucky to be called for inteview.
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Typical thinknig errors contd. 5. Jumping to conclusions. e.g. I know I wont get that job 6. Emotional reasoning. e.g. I feel I’m no good. 7. Should statements. e.g. I should have a job by now. 8. Personalisation e.g. its my fault I’m out of work.
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The art of self talk Knowing what words to use and what words not to use ‘should’, ‘must’ and ‘have to’ are out, ‘can’ and ‘will’ are in.
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The 3 Steps to positive self-talk 1.Identifying your negative thoughts 2.Challenging and correcting your negative thoughts / thought stopping. 3.Developing your own positive affirmations
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Challenging you negative thoughts and beliefs Are beliefs based on objective reality Are they true all of the time ? Do you want to have these beliefs ? Are they helpful ? Do they help you reach your goal ? Do they help you feel confident ? Are there alternative ways of thinking about the situation that are more helpful ?
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Positive thinking I can get this job. I’m as good as anyone else. Not everyone good enough will get selected, which is no reflection on them as a person. I have many strengths. I have been selected for interview because I’m good enough. The job is available for the taking, someone must get it and I’m as worthy as anyone else. Regardless of how I get on, I still value myself and believe in myself and my ability. I will continue striving to improve myself all of the time. I am deserving of work, I know I am very capable and I will continue to seek jobs until I succeed.
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The challenge Trust yourself. Back yourself Be inspired. Be heroic and courageous.
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Staying positive in your job search Plan your work day Hang out with positive people Know your support networks Learn from the past Self-improve Keep your goals clearly in front of you Take a break, get out, get involved. Focus on yourself rather than on the economic climate Persist in the face of adversity Approach the interview as a sales pitch
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Success ‘ it isn’t how much talent you have that makes you successful; but your ability to use all the talent you have to reach your full potential’ ( Carl Lewis, winner of 10 Olympic gold medals ).
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Hard Work gets results I’m an ordinary bloke who has worked hard at his job. That’s the thing that motivates me, I’ve seen where I can get with hard work. (RO’G)
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