1. Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Mary Ellen Guffey Copyright © 2008 Chapter 6 Writing Process Phase 3: Revise, Proofread, Evaluate

2. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 2 The Business Writing Process: Phase 3 Revising Tips Evaluating Proofreading Marks

3. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 3 Revise for Clarity, Conciseness, and Readability  Keep it simple.  Keep it conversational.  Remove opening fillers.  Eliminate redundancies.  Reduce compound prepositions.  Purge empty words.

4. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 4 Revise for Clarity, Conciseness, and Readability  Kick the noun habit.  Dump trite “business” phrases.  Develop parallelism (balanced construction).  Apply graphic highlighting.  Measure readability.

5. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 5 Keep it Simple Avoid indirect, pompous language. Foggy: It would not be inadvisable for you to affix your signature at this point in time. Clear: You may sign now.

6. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 6 Keep it Conversational Use natural, familiar language. Conversational: We’re happy to credit your account for $100. Formal: Our accounting department takes pleasure in informing you that we have credited your account for the aforementioned sum of $100.

7. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 7 Remove Opening Fillers Avoid wordiness. Wordy: There are four menu items we must promote. Concise: We must promote four new menu items.

8. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 8 Eliminate Redundancies Say it only once! collect together contributing factor past history basic fundamentals personal opinion perfectly clear unexpected surprise few in number

9. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 9 Reduce Compound Prepositions Say it more concisely. at such time, at which time at this point in time due to the fact that, inasmuch as at a later date despite the fact that when now because later although

10. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 10 Purge Empty Words Unclutter your sentences. As for the field of athletic shoes, the degree of profits sagged. This is to inform you that we have a toll- free service line. Not all members who are registered will attend the conference.

11. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 11 Purge Empty Words Unclutter your sentences. As for the field of athletic shoes, the degree of profits sagged. This is to inform you that we have a toll- free service line. Not all members who are registered will attend the conference.

12. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 12 Purge Empty Words Unclutter your sentences. As for athletic shoes, profits sagged. This is to inform you that we have a toll- free service line. Not all members who are registered will attend the conference.

13. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 13 Purge Empty Words Unclutter your sentences. As for athletic shoes, profits sagged. This is to inform you that we have a toll- free service line. Not all members who are registered will attend the conference.

14. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 14 Purge Empty Words Unclutter your sentences. As for athletic shoes, profits sagged. We have a toll-free service line. Not all members who are registered will attend the conference.

15. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 15 Purge Empty Words Unclutter your sentences. As for athletic shoes, profits sagged. We have a toll-free service line. Not all members who are registered will attend the conference.

16. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 16 Purge Empty Words Unclutter your sentences. As for athletic shoes, profits sagged. We have a toll-free service line. Not all registered members will attend the conference.

17. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 17 Kick the Noun Habit Use simple, dynamic verbs. conduct an investigation of give consideration to make a decision about perform an analysis of take action investigate consider decide analyze act

18. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 18 Dump Trite “Business” Phrases Eliminate stale, puffed-up expressions. as per your suggestion pursuant to your request enclosed please find please feel free to call thank you in advance as you suggested as you requested enclosed is please call thank you

19. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 19 Dump Trite “Business” Phrases Eliminate stale, puffed-up expressions. Improved: As requested, we have enclosed a job application. Trite: Pursuant to your request, enclosed please find a job application.

20. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 20 Develop Parallel Expression Express similar ideas in balanced, matching constructions. Not parallel : We can collect information, store it, and it can also be updated. Parallel : We can collect, store, and update information.

21. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 21 Develop Parallel Expression Express similar ideas in balanced, matching constructions. Not parallel : She is conscientious, a hard worker, and pays attention to detail. Parallel : She is conscientious, hard-working, and detail-oriented.

22. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 22 Apply Graphic Highlighting  Letters, such as (a) and (b) within the text.  Numerals, such as 1, 2, and 3, listed vertically.  Headings and bullets.  Font type and size  CAPITAL LETTERS  Underscores  Boldface  Italics

23. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 23 Use Numbered Lists for High “Skim Value” Follow these steps to archive a document: 1.Select the document. 2.Select a folder. 3.Provide a file name. 4.Click “Save.” Follow these steps to archive a document: 1.Select the document. 2.Select a folder. 3.Provide a file name. 4.Click “Save.”

24. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 24 Use Bulleted Lists for High “Skim Value” Consumers expect the following information at product Web sites:  Price  Quality  Performance  Availability Consumers expect the following information at product Web sites:  Price  Quality  Performance  Availability

25. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 25 Add Headings for Visual Impact and Readability We need to discuss a number of topics at our next meeting: Budget. Come prepared to discuss our expense requests. Schedule. Who will be taking vacations or leaves? Hiring. Soon we must begin the hiring process to replace Matt. We need to discuss a number of topics at our next meeting: Budget. Come prepared to discuss our expense requests. Schedule. Who will be taking vacations or leaves? Hiring. Soon we must begin the hiring process to replace Matt.

26. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 26 A Word of Caution Too much emphasis leads to busy-looking documents, clutter, and confusion. Don’t overdo graphic highlighting! To be safe, use no more than three highlighting elements on a single page.

27. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 27 Consider Measuring Readability Measure word and sentence length to determine readability in MS Word. Robert Gunning’s Fog Index Flesch-Kincaid Index

28. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 28 Proofreading: What to Watch for Spelling Proofreading Names and Numbers Punctuation Grammar Format

29. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 29 How to Proofread Routine Documents  For computer messages, print a rough copy to read.  Look for typos, misspellings, and easily confused words.  Watch for inconsistencies and ambiguous expressions.  Check for factual errors.

30. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 30 How to Proofread Complex Documents  Print a copy, preferably double-spaced.  Set it aside and take a breather.  Allow adequate time for careful proofing.  Expect errors. Congratulate, not criticize, yourself each time you find a mistake!  Read the message at least twice—for meaning and for grammar/mechanics.  Reduce your reading speed. Focus on individual words.

31. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 31 Evaluating

32. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 32 Basic Proofreading Marks Delete Capitalize Lowercase (don’t capitalize) Transpose Close up

33. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 33 Basic Proofreading Marks Insert Insert space Insert punctuation Insert period Start paragraph

34. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 34 Unmarked Copy This is to inform you that beginning september 1 the doors leading to the Westside of the building will have alarms. Because of the fact that these exits also function as fire exits they can not actually be locked consequently we are instaling alrams. Please utilize the east side exists to avoid setting off the ear piercing alarms.

35. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 35 Marked Copy This is to inform you that beginning september 1 the doors leading to the Westside of the building will have alarms. Because of the fact that these exits also function as fire exits they can not actually be locked consequently we are instaling alrams. Please utilize the east side exists to avoid setting off the ear piercing alarms. use l doors

36. Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 36 Revised Copy Beginning September 1 the doors leading to the west side of the building will have alarms. Because these doors also function as fire exits, they cannot be locked; consequently, we are installing alarms. Please use the east side exits to avoid setting off the ear-piercing alarms.

37. End Mary Ellen Guffey, Business Communication: Process and Product, 6e Ch. 6, Slide 37