1. Communicating With Your Child’s School: How to Talk so They Will Listen © Dr. Alex Bailey, 2012 (201) 357-2277

2. Communication Timing –Start Early –Give a Heads-Up and a Head-Start –Methods: Phone E-mail Catch teacher as s/he walks to car ©Dr. Alex Bailey, 2012 (201) 357-2277

3. Language Cornered Cat Syndrome Empower the school/teachers –Ask for their observations –Ask for help or ideas –Always start with a “thank you” (even if you have to make it up ) © Dr. Alex Bailey, 2012 (201) 357-2277

4. Two Approaches to the Same Letter Dear Ms. X –Jonathan came home today and told me you kicked him out of class again. While I understand he is a trying kid, this just can’t continue. Every time he is kicked out of class, he misses instruction and falls further behind. I would really like it if you could find other ways to reprimand him that do not include sending him out of class. I see it as totally counterproductive and only gives him what he wants – which is to be excused from class (c) Dr. Alex Bailey, 2012 (201) 357-2277

5. Two Approaches to the Same Letter Dear Ms. X –Jonathan came home today and told me he was asked to leave class, again. I know he can be a trying kid and I really do appreciate that you are still working with him. I am concerned, however, that each time he is asked to leave, he misses the important information you are teaching and falls only further behind (which I believe is part of what motivates his behavior). I know you have many students and that his interruptions only complicate your classroom, but I am hoping that together we can come up with a more effective consequence for Jonathan when he acts out. If you would like, Jonathan’s father and I would be happy to make time to meet with you to discuss what you would like us to do to help and perhaps to share some things that we have seen Jonathan respond to in past years. We look forward to speaking soon. (c) Dr. Alex Bailey, 20012 (201) 357-2277

6. Two Approaches to the Same Letter Dear Ms. X –Jonathan came home today and told me you kicked him out of class again. While I understand he is a trying kid, this just can’t continue. Every time he is kicked out of class, he misses instruction and falls further behind. I would really like it if you could find other ways to reprimand him that do not include sending him out of class. I see it as totally counterproductive and only gives him what he wants – which is to be excused from class Dear Ms. X –Jonathan came home today and told me he was asked to leave class, again. I know he can be a trying kid and I really do appreciate that you are still working with him. I am concerned, however, that each time he is asked to leave, he misses the important information you are teaching and falls only further behind (which I believe is part of what motivates his behavior). I know you have many students and that his interruptions only complicate your classroom, but I am hoping that together we can come up with a more effective consequence for Jonathan when he acts out. If you would like, Jonathan’s father and I would be happy to make time to meet with you to discuss what you would like us to do to help and perhaps to share some things that we have seen Jonathan respond to in past years. We look forward to speaking soon. ©Dr. Alex Bailey, 2012 (201) 357-2277

7. Who to Approach? Teacher Head of Department Principal Guidance Staff ©Dr. Alex Bailey, 2012 (201) 357-2277

8. Follow up Ask how things are going –Give your own feedback –Always start with the positive Ask for a measure of change –Frequency vs. Intensity of behavior Ex. Does he interrupt less frequently? Ex. When he interrupts, can he refocus more quickly? Move up the ladder if necessary ©Dr. Alex Bailey, 2012 (201) 357-2277