1. Yr 11 mock feedback (March 2014)

2. Question 1 (F&H)  Points = greater range of points needed  Detail = further detail from the text needed  Quotes = appropriate, short, focused and embedded quotations needed  Understanding = at times you have missed the point / not followed the text’s ideas. Read carefully.  Not language / inference = you don’t need to start analysing language. It’s not assessing that skill  Focus on question = keep discussion relevant to what the question is asking you to explore  Repeating text – don’t just repeat large sections of the text

3. Question 2  Links = links between article and presentational features needed  Detail = further detail from the picture or headline  Picture = look at different details and think about what they suggest and how they affect a reader  Headline = look at different details and think about what they suggest and how they affect a reader  Quotations = relevant quotations need to be embedded  Effective = how successful has the presentational feature been in achieving it’s purpose? E.g. how does it help to persuade / argue / inform?

4. Question 3  Thoughts & feelings = keep focused on the thoughts and feelings; don’t start re-telling the story  Quotations = use quotations to support your points  Explain = explain how your quotations suggest / hint at particular thoughts / feelings  Detail = further examples / points needed  Start to finish = make sure you have looked at thoughts and feelings across the whole text  Not the language question = keep focused on thoughts and feelings rather than language techniques

5. Question 4  Quotations = use quotes to support your ideas  Language focus = don’t wander into presentational features or anything that isn’t the language (words, vocab, techniques etc) of the text  Compare = you need to make links between the texts – similarities and differences  Connectives = use comparative connectives to show the examiner where and how you are linking the text  Explain = explain what effect your language feature (e.g. rhetorical question) has on the reader  Effective? = explain how the language helps to achieve the text’s purpose. E.g. how does the language persuade / entertain / inform  Further examples = you need to use a couple more examples (across the texts) to show a more detailed understanding of language use  Detailed explanation = say a lot about a little. Give more detail in your explanation of why / how a language feature has been used  Balance = more balance between the two sources needed

6. Avoid  Makes the reader want to read on  The headline grabs the reader’s attention because it is big and bold  Writing about sentence structure in Q4. Stick to techniques and word choice.  Comparing by saying “Text 1 uses ____ to persuade the reader. But Text 2 doesn’t use ____ because it doesn’t need to persuade the reader.

7. Q5  Paragraphs = use them, vary them, link them  Connectives = use them to help the fluency of your sentences, link ideas and develop points / arguments  Sentence length = vary for effect  Sentence structure / openings = vary for effect  Punctuation accuracy = be careful; don’t make silly mistakes  Punctuation variety = try and use the full range (for effect)  Homophones = learn the common homophones e.g. their / there / they’re  Clarity = your expression isn’t always clear. Proof-read!  Style / tone = think about who you are writing for and match your tone style accordingly  Structure = think about how to order, sequence, structure your writing  Techniques = use a range of language techniques  Length = you need to try and write more  Vocabulary = don’t repeat words (unless for effect) Impress the examiner with your ‘ambitious vocabulary’

8. Q6  Paragraphs = use them, vary them, link them  Connectives = use them to help the fluency of your sentences, link ideas and develop points / arguments  Sentence length = vary for effect  Sentence structure / openings = vary for effect  Punctuation accuracy = be careful; don’t make silly mistakes  Punctuation variety = try and use the full range (for effect)  Homophones = learn the common homophones e.g. their / there / they’re  Clarity = your expression isn’t always clear. Proof-read!  Style / tone = think about who you are writing for and match your tone style accordingly  Structure = think about how to order, sequence, structure your writing  Techniques = use a range of language techniques  Length = you need to try and write more  Vocabulary = don’t repeat words (unless for effect) Impress the examiner with your ‘ambitious vocabulary’

9. Q2 (F)  Points = greater range of points needed  Detail = further detail from the text needed  Quotes = appropriate, short, focused and embedded quotations needed  Understanding = at times you have missed the point / not followed the text’s ideas. Read carefully.  Not language / inference = you don’t need to start analysing language. It’s not assessing that skill  Focus on question = keep discussion relevant to what the question is asking you to explore  Repeating text – don’t just repeat large sections of the text

10. Q3 (F)  Quotations = use quotes to support your ideas  Language focus = don’t wander into presentational features or anything that isn’t the language (words, vocab, techniques etc) of the text  Explain = explain what effect your language feature (e.g. rhetorical question) has on the reader  Effective? = explain how the language helps to achieve the text’s purpose. E.g. how does the language persuade / entertain / inform  Further examples = you need to use a couple more examples (across the texts) to show a more detailed understanding of language use  Detailed explanation = say a lot about a little. Give more detail in your explanation of why / how a language feature has been used

11. Q4 (F)  Detail = further detail from the picture or headline  Picture = look at different details and think about what they suggest and how they affect a reader  Headline = look at different details and think about what they suggest and how they affect a reader  Quotations = relevant quotations need to be embedded  Effective = how successful has the presentational feature been in achieving it’s purpose? E.g. how does it help to persuade / argue / inform?  Compare = you need to make links between the texts – similarities and differences  Connectives = use comparative connectives to show the examiner where and how you are linking the text