1. ‘The Telegram’
Critical essay
May 2011

2. Theme of loss War like a weapon Thin woman calm sadness
Elder in shock that his son is dead
Fat woman wishes another neighbour’s son is dead
Thin woman’s fear of son moving to England
Fat woman loses her prejudice when she sees the thin woman as she really is

3. Task
Choose a novel or short story which deals with the theme of love or loss or redemption. With reference to appropriate techniques, explain how the writer develops this theme, and discuss how it adds to your understanding of the text as a whole.

4. Learning Intention
To write a critical essay on the themes of “The Telegram”

5. Success Criteria A strong introduction At least 4-5 PEAR paragraphs
Clear conclusion

6. Introduction You Must Mention: The title of novel The author’s name
A brief summary of the plot
Key words from the title

7. Example Introduction
A short story which features the theme of loss is ‘The Telegram' by Iain Crichton Smith. ‘The Telegram’ is about two women who live in a Scottish village during World War Two. Their sons are away at war and when they see a telegram about to be delivered they both worry that it says that their son is dead. In order to analyse how Crichton Smith creates theme of loss the techniques of word choice and imagery will be examined.

8. Example Introduction
A short story which features the theme of loss is ‘……………………………..' by ………………………. ‘The Telegram’ is about ……………………………. ………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….. In order to analyse how Crichton Smith creates theme of loss the techniques of word choice and imagery will be examined.

9. Paragraph 2
Point – One sentence to explain when we see the theme of loss e.g. One way the theme of loss is shown is when…
Evidence – Quotation to back up your point e.g. This is illustrated through: “…….”
Analysis – Explain what the quotation means, identify the techniques used and explain what they suggest and what this tells us e.g. The use of the technique of ….…….. suggests…… This creates the effect of…….
Refer to the task – Explain how this point links back to the title e.g.Therefore this links to the theme of loss because …….

10. Paragraph 2 Example
One way that Crichton Smith creates the theme of loss is when the fat woman thinks her son is dead. This is shown through: “O God save my son O God save my son O God save my son.” Through this quotation Crichton Smith highlights that the fat woman is upset at the prospect of finding out her son is dead. Through the lack of punctuation Crichton Smith creates one long phrase as her words run together suggesting that she is speaking quickly. This conveys the sense of her panic and grief and shows her desperation to have her son safe, as she cannot be at peace and articulate her thoughts clearly. Also the word choice of “God” suggests she is praying and has connotations of religion. Through this Crichton Smith clearly emphasises her need for someone to help her and the fact that she will do anything to change the reality of her son being dead. The alliteration of “s” connects the words “save” and “son” which emphasises her desire for her son to be alive and well rather than lost at sea. It also highlights the importance of her son and the desperation that she feels to protect him even as he is fighting in the war. Therefore, through the fat woman’s reaction to her belief that the telegram is for her, the theme of loss is explored by illustrating the grief and panic that death causes for this character.

11. Paragraph 3
Point – One sentence to explain when we see the theme of loss
Evidence – Quotation to back up your point
Analysis – Explain what the quotation means, identify the techniques used and explain what they suggest and what this tells us
Refer to the task – Explain how this point links back to the title

12. Paragraph 3 Example
Another way Crichton Smith illustrates the theme of loss is through the description of the impact of the war. This is illustrated through: “It came on them as a strange plague.” This quotation tells the reader that lots of young men from the village had been killed in the war. The use of the technique of metaphor which compares the war to a contagious disease. This suggests that the war is killing a large number of men from this village and is spreading through the families, affecting everyone. This creates the effect of showing that the war has made loss an every day experience of these people. The use of the technique of word choice of “strange” suggests the war was unusual, unexpected and out of place in this village. This creates the effect of showing that they had never experience loss on this scale before. Therefore this links to the theme of loss because the war is affecting all families and causing fear that the village will lose a whole generation of young men.

13. Paragraph 4
Point – One sentence to explain when we see the theme of loss
Evidence – Quotation to back up your point
Analysis – Explain what the quotation means, identify the techniques used and explain what they suggest and what this tells us
Refer to the task – Explain how this point links back to the title

14. Paragraph 4 Example
Also Crichton Smith illustrates the theme of loss through ……………………………... This is illustrated through: “…………..……………………………………” This quotation tells the reader ………… ………….. The use of the technique of ………. suggests………. This creates the effect of…… ……….. The use of the technique of ………. suggests………. This creates the effect of…… ……. The use of the technique of ………. suggests………. This creates the effect of…… ……. Therefore this links to the theme of loss because ……………..

15. Paragraph 5
Point – One sentence to explain when we see the theme of loss
Evidence – Quotation to back up your point
Analysis – Explain what the quotation means, identify the techniques used and explain what they suggest and what this tells us
Refer to the task – Explain how this point links back to the title

16. Paragraph 5 Example
Additionally Crichton Smith illustrates the theme of loss through …………………….…………... This is illustrated through: “…………..……………………………………” This quotation tells the reader ………… ………….. The use of the technique of ………. suggests………. This creates the effect of…… ……….. The use of the technique of ………. suggests………. This creates the effect of…… ……. The use of the technique of ………. suggests………. This creates the effect of…… ……. Therefore this links to the theme of loss because ……………..

17. Paragraph 6
Point – One sentence to explain when we see the theme of loss
Evidence – Quotation to back up your point
Analysis – Explain what the quotation means, identify the techniques used and explain what they suggest and what this tells us
Refer to the task – Explain how this point links back to the title

18. Paragraph 6 Example
Finally Crichton Smith illustrates the theme of loss through ……………………………... This is illustrated through: “…………..……………………………………” This quotation tells the reader ………… ………….. The use of the technique of ………. suggests………. This creates the effect of…… ……….. The use of the technique of ………. suggests………. This creates the effect of…… ……. The use of the technique of ………. suggests………. This creates the effect of…… ……. Therefore this links to the theme of loss because ……………..

19. Conclusion Title of the novel Author’s name
Sum up the main points you have made it your essay
Link back to the title and be sure you have answered the question

20. Conclusion
In conclusion in “The Telegram” by Iain Crichton Smith it is clear that a theme of loss is created through the description of the war, the fat woman and thin woman’s reactions to the telegram and the elder’s actions after finding out his son is dead. Crichton Smith’s use of word choice and imagery effectively creates this theme and allows the reader to feel an emotional response towards the characters and feel sympathy at the widespread death impacting the remote village.

21. Give at least 2 comments about strengths and next steps.
Self/peer assessment
Give at least 2 comments about strengths and next steps.
Think about:
Does it have an introduction, at least 3 main body paragraphs and a conclusion?
Do the paragraphs meet the success criteria?
Is it relevant?
Does it name techniques?
Does it make sense and is accurate?

22. Conclusion
In conclusion in “ …………………………” by …………………… it is clear that the theme of ……………………… is created through ………………………………………………… ………………………………………………… Crichton Smith ’s use of ………………… …………. ……………………… effectively highlights this theme and causes the reader to feel ………………………………………….. Therefore……………………………………..