1. Confident Communication
On The spot!

2. ON THE SPOT– what do we do?
Interactive class… everyone in here will be invited up to speak for just 2-3 minutes on an assigned topic…
Good conversation is at the heart of EVERYTHING
networking, meetings, interviews, negotiations and raising your profile.
Make work easy, make work hard = drama
build alliances, create strong relationships with staff, bosses and clients, succeed at interviews, motivate and inspire.
But conversation is something most of us were never taught!
We learn to speak as babies, but how conversation actually works is something most of us pick up only haphazardly, and many have yet to learn.
Internet research – “how to act confident”
stand up straight
look them in the eye
Speak clearlyl
Some degree of “Fake it till you make it…”
But what if we learned some of the skills for how to BE confident instead of ACTING confident

3. Trust in our own skills & Self-Efficacy TRUST IN OURSELVES
What is CONFIDENCE?
Trust in our own skills
& Self-Efficacy
TRUST IN OURSELVES
At its root, confidence is a trust in your own skills and abilities but more,
it is a cousin to self-efficacy that is really derived from having trust that not matter what you’re faced with, you’ll figure out a solution. The behaviors that demonstrate true confidence can be improved and practiced over time. No one is missing “confidence” – but sometimes we need a bit of a map to help us find it.

4. Why is it important?
“By acting confident, you can influence how others perceive you, and you can change how you feel about yourself.”
~Jennifer Allyn, PwC
“By BEING confident, you can influence how you feel about yourself and others will perceive you as confident more naturally and organically.”
~Theresa French, FocusWorks Training & Development

5. HOW DO WE INTERRUPT THE CYCLE… how do we keep it from spinning out of control
IT STARTS WITH US

6. Considerations of Confident Communication
It’s not about you
You’re not a sponge
Evaluate what’s at stake and prioritize
Vocalization is not truth
Preoccupation is an enemy
Know what’s yours to own and what’s not
Know your own thoughts and impressions-- beliefs

7. 3 P’s of Confident Communication
Principle
Perspective
(em)Power
IT starts with us

8. “It’s the Principle of the Matter”
Examine your beliefs
The “shoulds” of life
Experiences
Sacrifice / Contribution
BUT SOMETIMES WE GET HUNG UP… on principal
White dress before Easter and not before
Texting during dinner is “not right” – no texting at the dinner table rule
What we find at the end of principle has been shaped by our beliefs
Shoulds, woulds, coulds
EXPERIENCES: WHAT HAS BEEN DONE TO US
SACRIFICE: WHAT WE HAVE DONE FOR OTHERS (sacrifice / contribution)

9. “Walk a Mile in Their Shoes”
Listening as a form of communication
Listening to understand
Nuances- what’s said between the words
Observe the things they choose to talk about
Paraverbal and Nonverbal communication
Repeating back – affirming what they just said – checking in
Nuances: what might be an underlying meaning under or behind the words
Observe: negative, positive, small minded, concepts, blue sky
Paraverbal : not what we say, how we say it

10. (em)POWER Responding VS Reacting
Yes And to move the conversation forward
Boundaries
Response vs Reaction –
YES AND – move conversation forward
BOUNDARies -- KNOW where yours are and ask where theirs are

11. ACTIVITY Two Ears – One Mouth For a REASON!
Effective listenting requires an understanding that it is not just the speake’s responsibility to make sure he/she is understood…

12. What did we learn? What did you have to do to make this work?
Did your conversation make sense?
Without any judgement, did anyone try to end on an easy or tough word?
How did this exercise show the importance of not immediately responding
What things do we miss if we don’t listen to the end?