1. Camp Changes Lives
Deborah Giboa, MD

2. hap·pi· ness: noun good fortune; pleasure; contentment; joy
INGREDIENTS:
Confidence
Competence
Relationships
hap·pi· ness: noun

3. “Happiness Now” Pressure
Unattainable
Conflicts with resilience
Removes opportunity for resilience “practice”
Causes us to change the narrative to support everything being ok
Limits the resources we offer
We’re terrible at predicting it for others

4. Comfort vs Discomfort Comfort Security Healing Identity Discomfort
Learning
Change
GROWTH

5. WHY RESPECT? Turns an obligation into an achievement
Transforms interaction into relationship
Gives an individual the certainty of belonging

6. RESPECT WHAT IS IT? Recognizing worth or excellence
Showing regard or consideration
Impossible to give if you don’t have any
Crucial for success.

7. RESPECT REQUIRES COMMUNICATION
Tone of voice.
Titles of respect.
Eye contact
Body Language
Privacy
Look up and around

8. RESPONSIBILITY Chores/roles Homework Practice Leadership Service
One work ethic; sentences

9. WHY DO ADULTS
SAY NO?
Love. Guilt. Fear.

10. CULTURE OF “SUCCESSFUL” FAMILIES
Myth vs
Truth

11. SOURCE: Journal of Child and Family Studies, Feb 2013

12. THE COST
“Students who reported having over-controlling parents reported significantly higher levels of depression and less satisfaction with life. Furthermore, the negative effects of helicopter parenting on college students’ well-being were largely explained by the perceived violation of students’ basic psychological needs for autonomy and competence.”

13. HOW DOES FAILURE HELP? independence → confidence Leads to competence
Builds relationship
Teaches resilience. 13

14. RESILIENCE CHALLENGES
Mistakes
Accidents
Pain
Social consequences
Judgment
11:00 News…

15. WHAT WOULD BE BETTER? Doing = learning. Doing builds resilience!
Life skills
Relationship skills
Problem-solving!
Look for chances to take one step back.

16. RESILIENCE “I’ll be interested to see what you do!” Mistakes Praise
Life lessons
Choices
Risk-taking
Resources!
“I’ll be interested to see what you do!”

17. WHAT ADULTS NEED TO REMEMBER
Adult involvement supports
Safety
Growth
Learning
Adult involvement harms
Confidence
Competence
Relationships

18. When not if
Set expectations
Remove the premise of failure as disappointment
Model the cycle

19. When-not-if Language Set Remove Model Set expectations
Model the cycle
Remove
Remove the premise of failure
Set
Set expectations
When-not-if Language

20. Resilience requires trust.
FINDING RESILIENCE
Resilience requires trust.

21. Empathy
without intervention.

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