Narcissism a very positive and inflated view of self Narcissists : Believe they are better than others Lack emotionally warm and caring relationships Constantly seek attention – Me or I Focus on material wealth and physical appearance A Narcissistic Nation

Epidemic !?!? On a reality TV show, a girl planning her Sweet 16 wants a major road blocked off so a marching band can precede her grand entrance on a red carpet. 5X as many Americans undergo plastic surgery and cosmetic procedures as 10 years ago Ordinary people hire fake paparazzi to follow them around to make them look famous. High school students physically attack classmates and post YouTube videos of the beatings to get attention. And for the past several years, Americans have been buying homes and expensive cars on credit they can't afford.

Additional Data from San Diego State University, 2007 Study of 17,000 students Revealed the extent of narcissism in the U.S. Findings: Two-thirds scored High on a measure of selfishness Narcissism increased 30% over the past twenty years.

Selfishness Concerned excessively or exclusively with oneself : seeking or concentrating on one's own advantage, pleasure, or well-being without regard for others - merriam-webster.com

How Does it Happen?

Origins Deliberately embracing this character weakness because of the fleeting pleasure associated with it Friendships with those who are very selfish Excessive use of Facebook and texting An obsession with pleasing one's peers Failure of parents to address this character conflict Permissive parenting Modeling after a selfish Parent(s) and/or Peers Excessive indulgence by parents Failure of parents to teach a moral code Educational experiences which support selfishness Unwillingness to sacrifice for others Compulsive comfort seeking activities The rejection of a moral code or religious faith - Institute for Marital Healing

Outcomes of Selfishness Lack of respect Lack of love of others Aggression Hatred Revenge Impairment to service

1 Samuel 2:22-25 (22) Now Eli was very old, and he kept hearing all that his sons were doing to all Israel, and how they lay with the women who were serving at the entrance to the tent of meeting. (23) And he said to them, "Why do you do such things? For I hear of your evil dealings from all the people. (24) No, my sons; it is no good report that I hear the people of the LORD spreading abroad. (25) If someone sins against a man, God will mediate for him, but if someone sins against the LORD, who can intercede for him?" But they would not listen to the voice of their father, for it was the will of the LORD to put them to death.

Haggai 1:3-9 (3) Then the word of the LORD came by the hand of Haggai the prophet, (4) "Is it a time for you yourselves to dwell in your paneled houses, while this house lies in ruins? (5) Now, therefore, thus says the LORD of hosts: Consider your ways. (6) You have sown much, and harvested little. You eat, but you never have enough; you drink, but you never have your fill. You clothe yourselves, but no one is warm. And he who earns wages does so to put them into a bag with holes. (7) "Thus says the LORD of hosts: Consider your ways. (8) Go up to the hills and bring wood and build the house, that I may take pleasure in it and that I may be glorified, says the LORD. (9) You looked for much, and behold, it came to little. And when you brought it home, I blew it away. Why? declares the LORD of hosts. Because of my house that lies in ruins, while each of you busies himself with his own house.

Matthew 19:16-22 And behold, a man came up to him, saying, "Teacher, what good deed must I do to have eternal life?" (17) And he said to him, "Why do you ask me about what is good? There is only one who is good. If you would enter life, keep the commandments." (18) He said to him, "Which ones?" And Jesus said, "You shall not murder, You shall not commit adultery, You shall not steal, You shall not bear false witness, (19) Honor your father and mother, and, You shall love your neighbor as yourself." (20) The young man said to him, "All these I have kept. What do I still lack?" (21) Jesus said to him, "If you would be perfect, go, sell what you possess and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me." (22) When the young man heard this he went away sorrowful, for he had great possessions.

James 3:14-16 (13) Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. (14) But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. (15) This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. (16) For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice. (17) But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere.

Philippians 2:3 Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.

Galatians 5:17-21 For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do. (18) But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. (19) Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, (20) idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, (21) envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.

Galatians 5:22-26 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, (23) gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. (24) And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. (25) If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit. (26) Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another.

For Parents of Young Children Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it. Start Early! Address selfish behavior immediately Promote and model essential virtues: respect, obedience, generosity & self-denial The Fruits of the Spirit (Gal 5:22-26)