Any violence in our humour? Roadkill ? Any violence in our humour?

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Presentation transcript:

Any violence in our humour?

Roadkill ? Any violence in our humour?

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Why did the chicken cross the road? PLATO: For the greater good.

ARISTOTLE: It is in the nature of chickens to cross roads.

Why did the chicken cross the road? MARX: It was a historical necessity.

Why did the chicken cross the road? TIMOTHY LEARY: Because that’s the only trip the establishment would let it take.

Why did the chicken cross the road? SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked attack…and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it. Any violence in our humour?

Why did the chicken cross the road? RONALD REAGAN: I forget. Any violence in our humour?

* * * CAPT. JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

Why did the chicken cross the road? MARTIN LUTHER KING: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question. Any violence in our humour?

Why did the chicken cross the road? FOX MULDER: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross the road before you believe it.

RICHARD M. NIXON: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did not cross the road. Any violence in our humour?

Why did the chicken cross the road? MACHIAVELLI: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was. Any violence in our humour?

At the “Road Kill Café” JERRY SEINFELD: Why does anyone cross the road? I mean, doesn’t anyone ever think to ask, “What the heck was the chicken doing wandering around all over the place anyway?” Any violence in our humour?

Why did the chicken cross the road? FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road shows your underlying sexual insecurity.

Why did the chicken cross the road? BILL GATES: I have just released the new Chicken Office 2000 which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, eliminate the DOS Shell, file your important documents, and balance your chickbooks.

OLIVER STONE: The question is not, “Why did the chicken cross the road?” Rather, it is, “Who is crossing the road at the same time, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?”

Why did the chicken cross the road? DARWIN: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are genetically disposed to cross roads. Any violence in our humour?

Why did the chicken cross the road? EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

Why did the chicken cross the road? KONRAD LORENZ: Chickens are hard-wired to wander randomly in search of food.

Why did the chicken cross the road? BUDDHA: Asking the question denies your own chicken nature.

Why did the chicken cross the road? EMERSON: The chicken did not cross the road… It transcended it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? TEACHER: It’s a requirement of the ministry…a new curriculum document. Any violence in our humour?

Why did the chicken cross the road? CHICKEN: …. ….. ….The Rooster!..

Why did the chicken cross the road? HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain. Any violence in our humour?

Why did the chicken cross the road? COLONEL SANDERS: Any violence in our humour?