Grief and Loss. What Causes us Grief? Death of someone close to us DivorceAbuse Eating Disorders Loss of a job Life Altering Accident Paralysis Others.

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Presentation transcript:

Grief and Loss

What Causes us Grief? Death of someone close to us DivorceAbuse Eating Disorders Loss of a job Life Altering Accident Paralysis Others you can think of…

5 Stages of Grief DenialAngerBargainingDepressionAcceptance

Denial Denial: At first, we tend to deny the loss that has taken place, and may withdraw from our usual social contacts. “This is not happening to me!”

Anger The grieving person may then be furious at the cause of the loss and is angry with the situation. “Why is this happening to me?!”

Bargaining Now the grieving person may make bargains with someone, something, or even a higher power, asking, “If I do this, will you take away the loss?”

Depression The person feels numb, although anger and sadness may remain underneath. “I don’t care anymore.”

Acceptance This is when the anger, sadness and mourning have tapered off. The person simply accepts the reality of the loss. “It will be okay.”

Coping Mechanisms What do people need to do to help them deal with grief? This will be different for everyone. Most people find they need to: Grieve in their own way and in their own time. Hear the advice of others, but choose what they need or what feels right for them. Take care of themselves Rest, relax and exercise Have time alone Spend time with someone they trust Understand what has happened and make sense of the changes that are happening in their lives. Make as few changes as possible until they feel they are ready, usually about a year.

Be with someone who: Has patience Is willing to listen Respects feelings Is not upset by tears Will keep the persons story private

How to help others who are grieving… It is not easy to help others with their grief. It is even harder to help someone when you are dealing with your own grief. Ways to help may include to: Listen as they repeat their story over and over and the story of the life of the person who died (the good and not so good) Accept what they are saying without denying it or making their grief seem less than what they say it is. Talk with them about what has happened. Do not lessen the importance of their grief with comments such as or “it was for the best” or “I completely understand how you feel”. Try to understand their fear and what the loss means to them. Find out what is helpful to them, what they need and if they need you to help them get it. Give help like cooking a meal or baby sitting.

Grief is the most intense and enduring emotion we can experience. Help yourself and help others whenever you or someone else you know may be experiencing grief!

Lifetime Achievement Assignment Lets celebrate your Legacy Must include the following: Date of birth, place of birth Date of death, place of death (optional – not required) Name of high school or college from which he/she attended or graduated Military service and decorations (optional) Jobs held - including retirement Names and relations of family members, surviving. Awards/Recognitions received Organizations to which the deceased belonged (volunteer work, fraternal organizations, veterans’ groups, etc.) Must be Positive and Upbeat – Nothing Negative! (At least 75 years old or older) Note: It’s a celebration of all the wonderful things You hope to accomplish in a lifetime.

Sample of Lifetime Achievement Assignment Cured Cancer Caught the winning touchdown in the Superbowl Was a college professor Held many degrees Was known as a kind, loving person, who was always willing to help others. Had 5 kids Help build schools for under developed countries Wrote many books Became a war hero Became a successful teacher Whatever it is go BIG, remember this is a lifetime of all the wonderful things you plan to accomplish. Remember it must be positive and upbeat.