Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 789! Because 789!
What did the spider do on the computer? It made a website!
What has four legs but can't walk? What has four legs but can't walk? A table!
How do you know carrots are good for your eyes? A. Because you never see rabbits wearing glasses!
On which side of an ostrich are the feathers? The outside!
“Joey, can you come out and play?” “No. I have to help my dad do my homework.”
What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? Dam!
Why did the clown take off his shoes? His feet felt funny.
What did the elevator say to the doctor? “I’m coming down with something.”
What is the longest word in English? “Smiles. There’s a mile between each “s”.
Why did the bunny cross the road? Because it wanted to show its girlfriend it could hip hop!
Why did the man put his money in the freezer? He wanted cold hard cash! He wanted cold hard cash!
Where do polar bears vote? Where do polar bears vote? The North Poll
Where do snowmen keep their money? In snow banks.
What's brown and sticky? A stick.
Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on? It let out a little wine!
What dog keeps the best time? A watch dog.
What did the water say to the boat? Nothing, it just waved.
What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room? What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room? Odor in the court.
Why did the elephant eat the candle? He wanted a light snack! He wanted a light snack!
What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.
What letters are not in the alphabet? The ones in the mail, of course!
What did the gum say to the shoe? “I’m stuck on you.”
What do you call cheese that is not yours? Nacho Cheese
After a careful examination the doctor said, “ I’m sorry to tell you that you’ve only got four hours to live. {cont.}
Is there anyone you want to see before you go?” “Yes,” answered the patient. “ Another doctor.”
Dad, “You usually talk a lot on the phone. Why did you only talk half an hour?” Daughter, “It was a wrong number!”
What goes up the chimney down, but not down the chimney up? An umbrella
Where do spices go when they are sick? To see Dr. Pepper.