Define Grace and Truth Character Study – Samaritan Woman Signs and Symptoms My REBT Worksheet Example Team Time Agenda

Page 12  Unimaginable favor  Unconditional love and acceptance  “Relational aspect” of God’s character  Freedom, not boundaries

 Limits on behavior  Right versus wrong  What is real – describes how things really are  “Structural aspect” of God’s character  Boundaries, not freedom

 Truth without grace is “judgment” (condemnation)  Grace without truth is “license”

 John 4:15-26  How were the Woman’s relationships?  With God  With others  With herself  “Go, call your husband and come back”  Why did Jesus say this?  What was the truth of the situation?  What truth am I avoiding? What do I not want to face?

 “You are right when you say you have no husband. The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true.”  How did Jesus say this to the woman? (Hint, look at her reaction in verse 19)  Why didn’t she feel condemned or criticized?  Grace and truth removed the “guilt barrier” to change  How did truth and grace impact the woman?  How did truth and grace impact the village?  (Acts 8:1-25 Samaria mentioned specifically)

 Signs and Symptoms when we get grace or truth wrong  Lack of grace – Guilt & shame → hiding  Lack of truth – No honesty → hiding  If you are hiding, (even in the church),  You cannot become “poor in spirit”  You cannot be “healed”

Page 102  My Example – Managing my frustrations  Saturday  Guy who drove recklessly around me  Frustrated with forgetting return items in the car when I walked into Lowes  Guy at return counter at Lowes  Snapping at my daughter, demanding  Snapping at my wife – keys to van, backing up

A guy in a car passed me illegally and recklessly through a turn only lane. I rode on the horn. I was going 51 in a 45. He turned off very soon. I threw my hands up.

Emotions: Anger, frustration Behaviors: Reacting, getting aggressive

I can’t stand it when someone drives crazy and recklessly around me and my new car. I’m better than them. They broke the law. He startled me. Why would he do this to me? Everyone should give me space on the road.

I can stand it, I just don’t want to I’m not better than anyone -> wrong perspective Startled is a good reaction He was inconsiderate, not personally attacking me Unrealistic expectation – my preference, not reality

I would like people to drive considerately around me – I should set the example I can “stand it”, not necessarily like it He’s only human, maybe it was a mistake – I’m not perfect either

New Emotions: Annoyed Concerned New Behaviors Praying for him Being self-controlled Taking a calming breath and choosing how to respond

 Next week, someone will share REBT  In your teams, the goal is truth & grace  Share the one thing you each want to change  Take turns speaking and listening – if you need more time, work it out