Reconciliation Ladder My Trash Your Trash LOOK INSIDE REACH OUT Forgive & Let Go Speak the Truth, Carefully Right Wrongs Ask for Forgiveness Apologize Change Your Behaviors Change Your Attitude Acknowledge Mistakes to Self Here is a tool we can use to guide our process of reconciliation. It is a ladder, so we’ll start at the bottom rung. We take it one step at a time; you don’t have to commit to the entire journey in order to take a helpful step. It gets harder the higher we climb. The bottom can happen in our head, so we have control. The middle requires us to start being vulnerable by including a second person in the mix, who may not be aligned with our game plan for reconciliation. The top seems easier, because it is easier to focus on others’ shortcomings, but it is the hardest to do WELL, because we have to CAREFULLY speak the truth about someone else’s junk. You can’t skip steps. What happens if you speak the truth without changing your attitude and apologizing? [expect to trigger a strong defensive response.]