 (Worse) How to adjust multiple settings of the process parameters was outside of the knowledge of the engineers.  (Better) The engineers did not know.

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Presentation transcript:

 (Worse) How to adjust multiple settings of the process parameters was outside of the knowledge of the engineers.  (Better) The engineers did not know how to adjust multiple settings of the process parameters.

 (Worse) Standardization of the accreditation procedures was achieved by the committee.  (Better) The committee standardized the accreditation procedures.

 (Worse) For optimization of the conditions for robust design problems, the applicability of a novel approach is performed in this study.  (Better) This study applies a novel approach to optimize the conditions for robust design problems.

 (Worse) An experiment of the PCVD process in IC manufacturing is required of the engineer.  (Better) The engineer must experiment with the PCVD process in IC manufacturing.

 (Worse) Significant contributions by the proposed procedure are made to the manufacturing sector.  (Better) The proposed procedure significantly contributes to the manufacturing sector.

 (Worse) Transformation of the structure is achieved by strict control of the variables.  (Better) Strictly controlling the variables transforms the structure.

 (Worse) A conclusion is made in this study that it is necessary for the parameters to be varied by engineers to ensure that operations are effectively controlled by the system.  (Better) We conclude that engineers must vary the parameters to ensure that the system effectively controls operations.

 First Person is appropriate when the author wants to emphasize his or her opinion.  Other examples include We can infer, We postulate, We recommend, and We hypothesize.

 (Worse) An assessment of the proposed method in this section is made so that accurate data can be ensured.  (Better) This section assesses the proposed method to ensure accurate data.

 (Worse) Complexity of the computational process is increased by their approach.  (Better) Their approach further complicates the computational process.

 (Worse) Described in the following section is how implementation of the control factor is achieved by the proposed scheme.  (Better) The following section describes how the proposed scheme implements the control factor.

 (Worse) No significant effect on the mean response is made by the factor.  (Better) The factor does not significantly affect the mean response.

 (Worse) Assessment of the product's reliability is made by the practitioner is achieved through means of compilation of statistics.  (Better) The practitioner assesses the product's reliability by compiling statistics.