1. Building a Better Marriage At Jesus’ Feet

2. Fate of Marriages 1.End in legal divorce 2.Settle for emotional divorce 3.Grow in love for a lifetime

3. People who Build Great Marriages… Abide in Jesus Abide in Jesus – John 15:4-5 – “Fruit” = supernaturally good words & actions (‘fruit of the Spirit’ in Gal 5) – Assumes a relationship with Jesus – Requires time & obedience

4. People who Build Great Marriages… Abide in Jesus Abide in Jesus Practice Selflessness Practice Selflessness – Philippians 2:3-8 – A great marriage requires me to sacrifice my rights & desires, time & possessions Either I sacrifice myself, or I sacrifice my marriage!

5. People who Build Great Marriages… Abide in Jesus Abide in Jesus Practice Selflessness Practice Selflessness Accept Others in Love Accept Others in Love Romans 15:7 Therefore, accept one another, just as Christ also accepted us to the glory of God.

6. Unconditional Acceptance… Does not: ask “did I marry the wrong person?” ask “did I marry the wrong person?” rehearse a list of things you don’t like rehearse a list of things you don’t like try to change your spouse try to change your spouse threaten to leave threaten to leave Does: trust in the sovereignty of God trust in the sovereignty of God verbalize unconditional commitment verbalize unconditional commitment practice thankfulness practice thankfulness

7. People who Build Great Marriages… Abide in Jesus Abide in Jesus Practice Selflessness Practice Selflessness Accept Others in Love Accept Others in Love Practice Empathy Practice Empathy – the ability to identify with and understand somebody else's feelings or difficulties

8. People who Build Great Marriages… Abide in Jesus Abide in Jesus Practice Selflessness Practice Selflessness Accept Others in Love Accept Others in Love Practice Empathy Practice Empathy – Discover your spouse’s love language Words of affirmationActs of service Quality timePhysical touch Receiving gifts

9. People who Build Great Marriages… Abide in Jesus Abide in Jesus Practice Selflessness Practice Selflessness Accept Others in Love Accept Others in Love Practice Empathy Practice Empathy – Discover your spouse’s love language – Practice walking in your spouse’s shoes 1 Peter 3:7 Husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way…

10. People who Build Great Marriages… Abide in Jesus Abide in Jesus Practice Selflessness Practice Selflessness Accept Others in Love Accept Others in Love Practice Empathy Practice Empathy Edify with their Words Edify with their Words Proverbs 18:21 Death and life are in the power of the tongue…

11. People who Build Great Marriages… Abide in Jesus Abide in Jesus Practice Selflessness Practice Selflessness Accept Others in Love Accept Others in Love Practice Empathy Practice Empathy Edify with their Words Edify with their Words Proverbs 12:18 There is one who speaks rashly like the thrusts of a sword, But the tongue of the wise brings healing.

12. Become a Great Communicator Avoid: sarcasm sarcasm public critique or correction of spouse public critique or correction of spouse absolute language (“you never… you always…”) absolute language (“you never… you always…”) withdrawal withdrawal Practice: listen before you speak listen before you speak praise your spouse in private & in public praise your spouse in private & in public speak truth in love (truth surrounded by encouragement) speak truth in love (truth surrounded by encouragement)

13. People who Build Great Marriages… Abide in Jesus Abide in Jesus Practice Selflessness Practice Selflessness Accept Others in Love Accept Others in Love Practice Empathy Practice Empathy Edify with their Words Edify with their Words

14. Application Review sermon slides w/ spouse Review sermon slides w/ spouse Read a book together this summer Read a book together this summer – A Lasting Promise: A Christian Guide to Fighting for Your Marriage Stanley, Trathen, McCain, and Bryan – The Five Love Languages Gary Chapman – Building your Mates Self-Esteem Dennis and Barbara Rainey Don’t be afraid to get help Don’t be afraid to get help