1. A genre-based approach to written feedback on writing exercises in English as a second language Claudia Böttger & Nicole Diedrichsen Europäische Fernhochschule Hamburg - University of Applied Sciences
Bristol University

2. Challenges
1:4 appeals from students are on the type of feedback they get
Annual student evaluation of distance teaching on all B.A., M.A. and M.B.A.s show that feedback causes discontent
foreign languages and business communication is largely exempt from this
Process of Quality Assurance Agency underway - focus on research-based teaching
Launch of pilot project on student support systems at distance university (May 2012)
Feedback particularly important during first year
(Tait 2003; Chetwynd & Dobbyn 2011)

3. Students Adult learners studying while at work
Studying for business-based
B.A., M.A. and M.B.A.
Mandatory Business language module
25-50 years of age
48 % male – 52 % female
At work most of them engage in NNS-NNS (written) interactions on a weekly/regular basis
(Highly) motivated, but very busy

4. Tutors 6 tutors business English 2 tutors business Spanish
2 tutors business French
Degrees in second language teaching (B.A., M.A., Ph.D.)
Experienced as language teachers, translators and authors

5. Background Considerable differences in types of feedback
given by tutors
varying according to tutor
to types of language exercises
wanted by students and their reported uses of it
Feedback is too short
Comments are not clear and not helpful.

6. Functions of feedback
helps clarify what good performance is (goals, criteria, expected standards)
facilitates the development of self‐assessment (reflection) in autonomous learning
provides assessment to students about their learning
triggers tutor and peer dialogue around learning
encourages positive motivational beliefs and self‐esteem in autonomous learners
opens opportunities to close the gap between current and desired performance
gives information to tutors to help devise learning material for autonomous learners.
(Nicol 2007)

7. Purpose of study
To sensitize tutors to form and function of written feedback by using a corpus-based approach (Swales & Feak 2009a, 2009b)
To give support to students to adequately exploit feedback's potential in distance-learning context
by analysing written feedback as a genre from a textlinguistic perspective (Mauranen 1993; Bhatia 1998; Hyland 2011).

8. Agenda Background Methodological considerations Discussion of examples
Next steps

9. Form and function of genres
are historically grown and institutionally shaped textual patterns
have a set of communicative purposes
may vary their generic function, i.e. across domains, media, cultures and over time.
The rationale for the genre
shapes the schematic and rhetorical structure of the discourse
determines and constrains choice of content and style.
(Swales 1990; Bhatia 2003)
The primary determinant of genre membership is that of 'purpose', the schematic structure and linguistic features are regarded as dimensions to the realisation of genres (cf. Eggins 1994: 36).

10. Genre analysis provides framework for move analysis
rhetorical move structure analysis explores
communicative function of text
identifies words/phrases associated with it.
The primary determinant of genre membership is that of 'purpose', the schematic structure and linguistic features are regarded as dimensions to the realisation of genres (cf. Eggins 1994: 36).

11. Corpus on feedback to business English tests
Corpus on Feedback on writing texts for
Business English in international contexts (internal)
London Chamber of Commerce (B2)
Business English Cambridge (B2)
International legal English certificate, Level B2/C1
Pilotstudy
For each of these 4 tests: corpus of 20 feedback samples

12. Subcorpus on feedback to ILEC test
International legal English certificate, Level B2/C1
Reading test:
1. multiple-choice cloze, emphasis on lexis
2. Open cloze, emphasis on structure
3. Word formation, emphasis on lexis
4. Text preceded by multiple matching questions
5. Text from which sentences have been removed and placed in jumbled order after the text.
6. Text followed by four-option multiple-choice questions.
Writing test: writing a letter and memorandum

13. Subcorpus on feedback in EFL
Subcorpus: Feedback on ILEC test
1 page template to write a commentary and give marks
20 feedbacks of 2 different types of feedback
10 feedbacks on written EFL tests with good grades
10 feedbacks on written EFL tests with bad grades

14. Subcorpus on feedback on poor writing
Subcorpus: Feedback: negative news
Research on negative news in different institutional settings (hospital, business settings, consultations etc.) (Bührig & Meyer 2007, Böttger & Bührig 2010)
Highly complex communicative task
Helps identify specific learner needs (retrospection)
At the same time must encourage learner (foreward-looking)

15. Agenda Background Pilot project on business writing
Methodological considerations
Discussion of examples
Next steps

16. Communicative pattern of negative news Naming the negative news
Buffer
Opening with general comment.
Reasons for negative news
Explaining
the causes for negative news.
Naming the negative news
- Describing
the negative news.
Closing
Announcing future steps; foreward looking statement.
From our analysis of our corpus of NS-NS discouse, we culled the information that letters of refusal are structuredusing the following move structure:
Argumentative moves for communicating negative news effectively (Swales & Feak 2009a, 2009b; Guffey 2010)

17. Communicative pattern in feedback on poorly written work
Buffer
Opening with general comment or retrospective -on-skills.
Reasons for
marking it as mistake
Explaining
the causes for marking it as mistake.
Naming the mistake
- Describing
the mistake.
Closing
Announcing future steps; foreward looking statement.
From our analysis of our corpus of NS-NS discouse, we culled the information that letters of refusal are structuredusing the following move structure:
Argumentative moves for communicating negative news effectively (Swales & Feak 2009a, 2009b; Guffey 2010)

18. Feedback to poor work Dear Ms Lauder,
Here are the results of your test. As you can see you are moving up the ladder step by step, which is very rewarding.
The vocabulary exercises in tasks 2 and 4 were your biggest problem. For practice I would suggest you take the vocabulary from task 2 and try to put the words into sentences of your own. As to task 4, practice for this could be looking at the article on p. 4 again. Your letter fulfilled the task and stayed well within the parameters for the number of words. Also your use of register fitted the task in hand. There were, however, a few grammar and a couple of spelling mistakes.
This easily happens when one is writing online, I know. Check out the present perfect to see if it is 100% clear.
You are working really hard and I am sure you will be going onto the next step soon. As always please do not hesitate to contact me, should you have any queries.
Yours sincerely, Penny
Buffer:
Genuine praise;
retrospection
Reasons:
explains why
result is poor
Giving
recommen-
dations
Closing:
Foreward looking
statement &
words of en-
couragement

19. Feedback to poor work Dear Mr Smith,
Thank you for your exam paper. I am sorry to say it is not quite such a good result as last time, but well within the pass range. As you can see by the marks on the right, two of the tasks (2 & 4) presented quite a problem although you received full marks with task 1.
The ‘word family’ exercise was much more difficult this time, so you should not take it too hard. (...) It might, however be an idea to look at the exercise again and work out all the derivations of the stem words.
The content and the register of the letter were fine, however, there were several grammar mistakes this time. Could you check out the use of the gerund and the verbs which take it?
Please do not hesitate to contact me, should you have any queries.
Yours sincerely,
Penny
Buffer:
Regret &
assess-
ment
Reasons:
explains why
result is poor
Re-
commen
dation
Closing:
Invitation to
maintain
dialogue

20. Communicative pattern in feedback on poorly written work
Buffer
Opening with general comment or retrospective -on-skills.
Reasons for marks
Explaining
the reasons for marks.
Recommend-
ations
Offering advice
& recommen-
dations
Giving
marks
- Giving
mark.
Closing
Announcing future steps; foreward looking statement.
From our analysis of our corpus of NS-NS discouse, we culled the information that letters of refusal are structuredusing the following move structure:
Corpus-based findings on rhetorical moves for communicating negative news effectively

21. Agenda Background Pilot project on business writing
Methodological considerations
Discussion of examples
Next steps

22. Outlook Undertaking more corpus based research
Considering culturally determined conventions of conveying negative news in feedback
Providing feedback to tutors on students‘ reception of feedback and peer discussion
Organizing special topic workshop for tutors
Discussing how to make students aware of potential of using feedback for autonomous learning
Integrating audio feed-back

23. References
Bhatia, V. K. (2004): Worlds of Written Discourse: A Genre-based View. London: Continuum Publishers.
Chetwynd, F. & C. Dobyn (2011): Assessment, feedback and marking guides in distance education. Open learning: The Journal of Open and Distance Learning. Vol 26, Issue 1,
Connor, U. (2004): Intercultural rhetoric research; Beyond texts. English for Academic Purposes, p
Hyland, K. (2005:) Metadiscourse: Exploring interaction in writing. London: Continuum.
Martin, P. M. (2003): A genre analysis of English and Spanish research paper abstracts in experimental Social Sciences. English for Specific Purposes, v. 22, n. 1, p
Nicol, D. (2000): Principles of good assessment and feedback: Theory and practice Retrieved 31 October 2009 from
Rehbein, J. (1984): Beschreiben, Berichten und Erzählen. In: Ehlich, Konrad (ed.): Erzählen in der Schule. Tübingen: Narr,
Swales, J.M. (1990): Genre analysis: English in academic and research settings. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press, 1990.
Swales, J. M. & C. B. Feak (2009a): Abstracts and the Writing of Abstracts. Ann Arbor: Michigan Series in English for Academic & Professional Purposes.
Swales, J. M & C. B. Feak (2009b): Academic Writing for Graduate Students: Essential Tasks and Skills: A Course for Nonnative Speakers of English (English for Specific Purposes. Ann Arbor: Michigan Series in English for Academic & Professional Purposes.
Tait, A. (2000): Planning student support for open and distance learning. Open Learning,15(3),