1. COMMUNICATION & CONFLICT: HOW DO I HANDLE IT? Northwestern Illinois Association Sheri White, Ms Ed 3626 East State St. Rockford, IL www.thenia.org (815)963-0937 2/14 (Presented for SASED) 1

2. OBJECTIVES 1.To appreciate the power and effects of body language in communication 2.To recognize barriers and strategies for effective communication 3.To become aware of active listening techniques 4.To realize personal style when experiencing conflict 2

3. COMMUNICATION…WHAT IS IT??? “The process of communication is what allows us to interact with other people: without it, we would be unable to share knowledge or experiences with anything outside ourselves. Communication forms include speaking, writing, gestures, touch, and broadcasting…” -Wikipedia definition 3

4. WHAT DOES YOUR BODY LANGUAGE SAY? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5X7fKZTmZa4 4

5. BARRIERS TO EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION Reduced Sensitivity to Receiver Lack of Communication Skills Decreased Knowledge of Subject Emotional Interference/Distractions Lack of Confidence Physical Distractions Lack of Interest Information Overload Inadequate Feedback What others can you think of? 5

6. BODY LANGUAGE AND COMMUNICATION 6

7. Objective : to demonstrate that nonverbal communications or body language can often be very effective in “communicating” with others Activity: 1)Find a partner you do not know 2)On signal, “introduce self” – no talking - may use props, visuals, pictures, signs, gestures 7 NONVERBAL INTRODUCTIONS

8.  You will hear a series of instructions…  Copy them as fast as you can….  Listen carefully… TRY THIS WITH ME… 8

9. Encouraging Can you tell me more?” Clarifying When did this happen? Restating the facts So you would like your parents to trust you more, is that right? Reflecting the emotions You seem very upset. Summarizing These seem to be the key ideas you’ve expressed… Validating I appreciate your willingness to resolve this matter/ 9 ACTIVE LISTENING

10. AN ACTIVITY TO PRACTICE LISTENING 10

11. 11 TAKE A BREAK!

12. “I” Statements Strategic Silence Others speak louder, you speak softer Cooling down period: Gives everyone a chance to physically get up and remove themselves from the situation (briefly) 12 STRATEGIES FOR DIFFICULT SITUATIONS

13. “I” STATEMENTS Direct and less threatening way of asking for what you want Use “I” statements to:  Describe the behavior  Express your true feelings about the behavior  State the outcome of the behavior 13

14. “I” STATEMENTS Avoid blaming “You shouldn’t act that way.” “You’re acting so immature.” Instead of saying…. “you are making too much noise…. “You are acting so immature, you should stop yelling…… 14

15. E----------------------------------------------I S----------------------------------------------N T----------------------------------------------F J-----------------------------------------------P KNOW YOURSELF = + COMMUNICATION! 15

16. MULTIPLE INTELLIGENCE THEORY = +COMMUNICATION 16

17. Conflict refers to some form of friction, disagreement, or discord arising within a group when the beliefs or actions of one of more members of the group are either resisted by or unacceptable to one or more members of another group - Wikipedia Self Awareness Activity Handout: How I Act in Conflict (15 minutes) 17 CONFLICT

18. CONFLICT STRATEGIES: What are you like? 18

19. Conflict = Negative/”Bad”??? OR Conflict = Opportunity to strengthen relationships, by resolving conflict you have an opportunity to turn it into something creative and new… SHIFT YOUR PARADIGM… 19

20. GROUP ACTIVITY Personal Goals… 20

21. EVERY CLOSING IS AN OPENING TO SOMETHING ELSE! 21