1. Strategies for Success: Managing the Transition Part II “ Life offers no greater responsibility, no greater privilege, than the raising of the next generation.” – C. Everett Coop “ Life offers no greater responsibility, no greater privilege, than the raising of the next generation.” – C. Everett Coop “Whoever said it first spoke with insight and wisdom: you don’t own children, you only borrow them.” – Anne Linn “Whoever said it first spoke with insight and wisdom: you don’t own children, you only borrow them.” – Anne Linn “The greatest gift you can give your children are the roots of responsibility and the wings of independence.” – Dennis Waitley “The greatest gift you can give your children are the roots of responsibility and the wings of independence.” – Dennis Waitley

2. Points to Ponder… If you were puzzled by them in high school, you will certainly be confused by them when they are in college. If you were puzzled by them in high school, you will certainly be confused by them when they are in college.

3. Points to Ponder… Remember, college is not Vo-tech training. Remember, college is not Vo-tech training. During their first year, please resist the urge to ask them what they are going to do after college. During their first year, please resist the urge to ask them what they are going to do after college.

4. Points to Ponder… Talk to them and with them, but not at them. Talk to them and with them, but not at them. Your offspring are responsible for their own behavior (not the college). On the other hand, if they are having trouble, don’t practice denial. Your offspring are responsible for their own behavior (not the college). On the other hand, if they are having trouble, don’t practice denial.

5. Points to Ponder… If there are problems at home, assure them that it is neither their fault nor their responsibility. If there are problems at home, assure them that it is neither their fault nor their responsibility. They are going to make mistakes and you can’t stop them. They are going to make mistakes and you can’t stop them.

6. Points to Ponder… If your child decides to stop-out, try not to panic – it may be the best thing they could do! If your child decides to stop-out, try not to panic – it may be the best thing they could do! Resist the temptation of competing with your child unless you are playing board games or fishing. Resist the temptation of competing with your child unless you are playing board games or fishing.

7. Points to Ponder… Remember, they will always be your child. Remember, they will always be your child.

8. Now to test your skills: Your daughter has called every night for the past 2 weeks. She is upset and sad about the break up with her boyfriend. You suspect she is spending a lot of time alone in her room and missing class. Your daughter has called every night for the past 2 weeks. She is upset and sad about the break up with her boyfriend. You suspect she is spending a lot of time alone in her room and missing class.

9. Answer? A. Remind her of the nice boy you both met during Springboard. B. Tell her there are more fish in the sea. C. Listen, listen and listen some more. D. Tell her “time heals all wounds” and focusing more on studies will help. E. Tell her how sorry you are that she feels so sad.

10. What do you do? Your son is frustrated because his roommate has pet mice (their cages smell) and his girlfriend is in the room all of the time (your son can’t even walk around in his underwear when he wants). Your son is frustrated because his roommate has pet mice (their cages smell) and his girlfriend is in the room all of the time (your son can’t even walk around in his underwear when he wants).

11. Answer? A. Call the Residence Life Office and tell them what’s going on. B. You are paying for a 2 person room - demand he straighten this out with his roommate. C. Listen and empathize D. Encourage him to talk to his Resident Assistant. E. Call the roommate (and/or his mother) yourself.

12. What do you do? While at home for Winter break, your son receives a letter indicating that he has been placed on academic probation. You are shocked to find out he has been less than honest about his grades. He will have to fulfill a number of requirements to remain in school. While at home for Winter break, your son receives a letter indicating that he has been placed on academic probation. You are shocked to find out he has been less than honest about his grades. He will have to fulfill a number of requirements to remain in school.

13. Answer? A. Tell him he has embarrassed the entire family and really let you down. B. Call President Rowe and convince him to reverse the decision. C. Explain that if he can’t handle a few simple college classes, he’ll never make it in life. D. Understand that he is likely embarrassed and humiliated and ask how you can help.

14. What do you do? Your daughter has announced during her junior year that she is dropping out of school (for now) to work at the Zen Meditation Center in Upstate New York where she had a summer job. Your daughter has announced during her junior year that she is dropping out of school (for now) to work at the Zen Meditation Center in Upstate New York where she had a summer job.

15. Answer? A. Jump to the conclusion that she must have joined some dangerous cult. B. Remind her that people who live in those places are losers who can’t make it in the “real world.” C. Listen attentively to her reasons for wanting to stop out. D. Assume that once she leaves college, she will never return.

16. Remember… Avoid pouting, taking it personally or guilting them when they don’t seem to have time to talk to you or come home. Avoid pouting, taking it personally or guilting them when they don’t seem to have time to talk to you or come home. Keep up with what is going on at Centenary. Keep up with what is going on at Centenary. What has upset them today is often forgotten in a couple of days. What has upset them today is often forgotten in a couple of days. Be prepared for news you don’t like. Be prepared for news you don’t like. Trust them…trust yourself… Trust them…trust yourself… Keep it all in perspective… Keep it all in perspective…