1. Dealing with Unhappy Coworkers Some Practical Coping Strategies 1,2 A Presentation for the SOMC Medical Imaging Seminar Kendall L. Stewart, M.D. March 4, 2006

2. Why is this important? There are a lot of unhappy people in the world. Most of them have to work. They often bring their misery with them. And their coworkers have to deal with that. 1 It can be a challenge. But the unhappy people at work need not ruin your day. The practical strategies in this presentation can help you manage others’ unhappiness instead of letting it manage you. 2 After mastering the information in this presentation, you will be able to describe –How unhappy coworkers behave, –Some of the reactions these behaviors elicit in others, –Some practical strategies for dealing more effectively with unhappy coworkers, –Why you should adopt these strategies, and –How you can deploy these strategies successfully. While you will not be able to make your miserable colleagues happy, you will be able to minimize their negative impact on your life. That’s no small thing.

3. How do unhappy people behave at work? They whine to anyone who will listen. They complain about everything. They find fault with everything and everybody. 1 They are sensitive and easily offended. They take everything personally. 2 They blame others for everything that goes wrong. They stay mad about something most of the time. They talk about people behind their backs. And they feel perfectly justified in acting the way they do. Worst of all, they just won’t shut up.

4. What reactions do unhappy coworkers elicit? Their coworkers feel –Bummed –Frustrated –Resentful –Impatient –Tired 1 –Imposed on –Fed up –Distracted –Weary –Overwhelmed –Hopeless 2,3 And they dread coming to work!

5. What practical strategies will assist you in dealing with unhappy coworkers? Recognize them. Accept them. 1,2,3 Observe them. Predict them. Manage them.* Agree with them. Poke fun at them. Avoid them. Pity them. Learn from them. Appreciate them. Distract them. Recruit them. Use them. Isolate them. Inform them. Ignore them. Confront them. Expunge them Leave them.

6. Manage them. Why should you? –This approach puts you in charge. –This perspective recognizes that these aggravating people can be managed— that is, you can manage your reactions to them. –This stance limits their ability to infect you with their fetid emotional drool. –This intention provides a welcome distraction as you reflect on what to do next. –This posture gives hope to your colleagues who are similarly oppressed by these troublemakers. How can you? –Observe recurring patterns of behavior. 1 –Confirm your observations with others. –Document these patterns. –Predict their behavior. –Prepare yourself and others beforehand. –When you turn out to be right, flash the “I told you so” signal. –Practice emotional detachment. –Remain unfailingly good humored.

7. What have you learned? There are a lot of unhappy people in the world. There are always some of them at work. These people are a threat to your mental health. Their bad moods—like all moods—are highly infectious. The practical strategies we have discussed will help you minimize the negative impact these folk impose on your life. Happiness really is a choice, but it is not easy. To achieve it, you are going to have to shake off some pretty miserable influences at work. But the payoff is worth the effort. 1,2,3

8. Where can you learn more? Bernstein, Albert J, Emotional Vampires: Dealing with People Who Suck You Dry, McGraw-Hill, 2002 Cavaiola, Alan A and Lavendar, Neil J, Toxic Coworkers: How to Deal with Dysfunctional People on the Job, New Harbinger Publications, 2000 Lloyd, Kenneth L, Jerks at Work: How to Deal with People Problems and Problem People, Career Press, 1999 Scott, Gini Graham, A Survival Guide for Working with Humans: Dealing with Whiners, Back-Stabbers, Know-It-Alls and Other Difficult People, AMACOM, 2004 Stewart, Kendall L et. al., A Portable Mentor for Organizational Leaders, SOMCPress, 2003 Please visit www.KendallLStewartMD.com to download related White Papers and presentations.www.KendallLStewartMD.com

9. How can you contact me? Kendall L. Stewart, M.D. VPMA and Chief Medical Officer Southern Ohio Medical Center President & CEO The SOMC Medical Care Foundation, Inc. 1805 27th Street Portsmouth, Ohio 45662 740.356.8153 stewartk@somc.org Webmaster@KendallLStewartMD.com www.somc.org www.KendallLStewartMD.com

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