11* Do you really mean that? - Oh yeah. Let's see... bless the poor and the sick and the needy and the afflicted...
12* What are you doing about it? - Well, sure I mean it.
13* Have I got control of you? - Doing? Who, me? Nothing. I guess. I just think that it would be kind of nice if You got control of things down here like You have up there, so people don't have to suffer so.
14That isn't what I asked you. What about your temper * That isn't what I asked you. What about your temper? You have a problem there, and your friends and family suffer. And then there's the way you spend your money... all on yourself. And how about the kinds of books you read?- Well I go to church, I pay my tithe, I don't...
15Excuse Me. I thought you were praying for me to bless the needy * Excuse Me. I thought you were praying for me to bless the needy. If that is to happen, I'll have to have help from the ones who are praying for it... like you.- Stop picking on me. I'm just as good as some of the rest of those I see every Sunday at church.
16* So could I.- All right. I guess that I have a few hang-ups, now that You mention it. I could probably mention some others.
17* You mean people like Ralph? - Look, Father. I need to finish up here. This is taking a lot longer than usual. Bless the missionaries to be led to the doors of the honest in heart.
19* Have you ever looked in his heart lately? - "That" Ralph... but he smokes and drinks and never goes to church.
20* I have. I looked. And it's one of those honest hearts your were just praying about. - Of course not. How can...
21Aren't you supposed to be a missionary * Aren't you supposed to be a missionary? I thought I made that pretty clear.- O.K. then, get the missionaries over there. Do you think I like having a non-member for a neighbor?
22Well, you called Me. And here I am. Keep on praying * Well, you called Me. And here I am. Keep on praying. I'm interested in this next part. You haven't changed the order around have you? ... Go on...- Hey, wait a minute. What is this? Criticize "me" day? Here I am, doing my duty, keeping your commandments to pray. And all of a sudden you break in and start reminding me of all my problems.
25* What about Bill?- Please forgive me of all my sins... and help me to forgive others.
26What about your prayers? * But your prayers.What about your prayers?- See. I knew it. I knew you'd bring him up. Listen Lord, he told lies about me, and I got fired. All my co-workers think I'm a first class creep, and I didn't do anything. I'm going to get even with him!
27Well, at least you're honest * Well, at least you're honest. I guess you enjoy carrying that load of bitterness around, don't you?- I didn't mean it.
28* Do you want to know a secret? - No, I don't. But I'll feel better as soon as I get even.
29You won't feel better. You'll feel worse. Listen to me * You won't feel better. You'll feel worse. Listen to me. You forgive Bill and I'll forgive you.- What secret?
30* Then I cannot forgive you. - But Lord, I can't forgive Bill.
31* No matter what. But you're not through with your prayer yet. Go on.
32Good. Good. I'll do just that * Good. Good. I'll do just that. But you stop putting yourself in all those places where you can be tempted.- Oh all right... please help me to control my feelings and not yield to temptations.
33* Quit hanging around the magazine racks and spending so much time in front of the tv. Some of that stuff is going to get to you sooner or later. You'll find yourself involved in some terrible things before long... and don't use me for an escape hatch either.- What do you mean by that?
34* Sure you do. You've done it lots of times -- you find yourself in a crisis situation, then you come running to me. "Lord, help me out of this mess and I promise I'll never do it again." It's amazing how the quality and intensity of your prayers improve when you are in trouble. Do you remember some of those bargains you tried to make with Me?- An escape hatch? I don't understand.
35Do you remember your prayer. I do. "Oh God * Do you remember your prayer. I do. "Oh God. Don't let her tell my mother where I've been. I promise I'll go to nothing but "G" rated movies from now on. She didn't tell your mother, but you didn't keep your promise. Did you?- Well I don't think... Oh... yeah... like the time Mom's visiting teacher saw me coming out of that movie about... Oh brother...
36* So am I.Go ahead and finish your prayer.- No Lord, I didn't. I'm sorry.
37* Every word. Every time.- Wait a minute. I want to ask you a question. Do you always listen to my prayers?
38How many chances have you given me * How many chances have you given me? There's not enough time between your "Amens" and your head hitting the pillow for me to draw a breath. How am I supposed to give an answer?- Then how come you never talked back to me before?
39* No. I could if *you* really wanted Me to. Child, I always want to. - You could, if you really wanted to.
40I already have. And thanks for letting me interrupt * I already have. And thanks for letting me interrupt. I get lonely to talk to you sometimes. Good night. I love you.- Father, I am sorry. Will you forgive me?