1. Conflict Resolution

2.  Workshop deliverables:  Understand importance of healthy conflict resolution  Identify primary causes and responses to conflict  Identify and discuss the 5 Conflict styles  Understand how to resolve conflict in a healthy/productive manner Workshop Deliverables

3. What is conflict? What words come to mind when we think of conflict?

4.  Conflict is inevitable! You cannot avoid it!  Be prepared to face it!  Why should I care to solve conflict in a healthy way?  physical health  mental health  career  relationships Why should I care?

5. Common causes of conflict:  Misunderstandings  Personality clashes  Competition for resources  Authority issues  Hurt feelings  Lack of co-operation  Differences of opinion  Low performance  Values or goal differences  Cultural differences Causes of conflict

6. Common responses to conflict:  Avoid the person  Change the subject  Try to understand the other  person’s point of view  Find a judge/arbitrator  Give in  Work toward a mutually  agreeable solution  Apologize  Whine or complain  Fight it out  Pretend to agree  Try to find common ground  Admit that you are wrong  Turn the conflict into a joke Responses to conflict

7.  Which style do you use most often?  Avoidance  Accommodation  Competition  Compromise  Collaboration Conflict Styles

8. “I’ll think about it tomorrow”  Avoidance means that a person knows there is a conflict but chooses not to deal with it.  An avoider walks away from the problem and may avoid the person with whom he or she is having the conflict. Conflict styles – Avoidance

9. Conflict styles - Accommodation “It would be my pleasure”  Accommodation is putting aside one’s own needs and concerns to satisfy the needs of the other person.  Don’t be a serial appeaser!!

10. “my way or the highway”  Competition is trying to win or make the other person lose by giving in.  In this style, a person defends his/her position or pursues his/her own goals without regard for the needs of the other person. Conflict styles - Competition

11. “let’s make a deal & meet halfway”  Compromise is giving up something to get something. It is an attempt to seek a middle ground.  Be pragmatic, come to a sensible solution Conflict styles - Compromise

12. “two heads are better than one”  Collaboration is working together to satisfy the needs of both people.  It involves problem solving and assumes that both people can get their needs met. Use during most important issues!! Conflict styles - Collaboration

13.  Step 1: Cool off  Hot tempers/emotions will never solve problems, get your head clear before confronting issue  Take a moment to brainstorm a few things that make you feel better when your angry. Working through Conflict – slide 1

14.  Step 2: Use “I” messages  Helps you express how you fell without attacking or blaming others  Examples:  “I feel like you have not done you part with the homework project”  “I’m annoyed because you left the kitchen a mess again”  “you” messages make people go on the defensive  “You left the kitchen a mess again” Working through Conflict – slide 2

15.  Let’s practice using “I” messages  Directions – take these “you” messages and turn them into “I” messages  1. “You never let me watch what you want on the TV”  2. “You never listen to me when I am talking.”  3. “You always make me late for work each morning.”  4. “You are cutting corners with your job duties and making more work for me.” Working through Conflict –slide 3

16.  Step 3: Retell the person what you heard  Examples:  “I hear that you wanted to go out with your friends so you didn’t clean up the kitchen. I hear that you intended to do it when you got home.”  “I hear that you are frustrated that I have not cleaned up the kitchen and it shouldn’t be your responsibility to clean up my mess.” Working through Conflict – slide 4

17.  Step 4: Take responsibility  In most conflicts, both parties have some responsibility over the situation. However, most of us just blame the other person entirely. Taking some responsibility increases the likelihood of resolving the conflict.  Examples:  “I should have cleaned the mess before I went out”  “I shouldn’t have yelled at you about the kitchen mess” Working through Conflict –slide6

18.  Step 5: Brainstorm solutions that satisfy both people  Be willing to work together  What are some solutions to the conflict of someone leaving the kitchen a mess? Working through Conflict –slide 7

19.  Step 6: Affirm, forgive or thank.  A handshake, hug, or kind word gives closure to the resolution of conflicts.  Forgiveness is the highest form of closure. Working through Conflict –final slide

20.  Why is it important to practice effective conflict resolution/styles in the workplace?  What are some examples of workplace conflict you’ve experienced or witnessed? Workplace Conflict

21.  Complete the scenario exercise Workplace Conflict –final slide

22. Additional Information

23. Additional Information-2