1. WELCOME PARTNERS!!
Konya 28th – 31st May 2009

2. Get 2 Know U
Please introduce yourselves to each other, by briefly telling the others in your group...
...your name
...your profession
...the country/city you come from
...your favourite meal
...your favourite movie
Then imagine all of you have to spend a wonderful evening together and decide as a group...
...what do you want to have for dinner,
...which movie you will watch after dinner.
Please find a program which everybody agrees on and present it to the other groups.

3. Brush up – what has been done so far…
Definition of coaching
Coaching is a context created for professional help to an individual in her/his situation. In this context a process consultant and a client equitably work togehter to help the coachee to (re)gain access to his/her resources and options. The coachee should be empowered to deal with problems, new situations or personal matters.
Reasons to start coaching
problems and challenges which are relevant for the coachee´s future
Protagonists in coaching processes
usually two persons – the coachee (person who seeks support/ has a problem) and the coach (professional supporter)

5. Coaches` ways to look at the coachee:
problem-oriented: the focus is the problem.
typical questions would be “How do you feel/ what do you think/ what are your experiences?”
solution-oriented: the focus is the solution to the problem. Problem and solution are regarded as two different things, which are relatively independent from each other. Typical questions would be
“What if...?”
“Which ideals/antetypes do you have?”
“What makes this situation good/ better than...?”
“How would it feel...?”

6. Contact/ opening the conversation
yes-set (Milton Erickson)
The intention is that the coach is asking questions, to which the answer of the coachee should be a “Yes”, thereby the coachee can get a feeling of being understood and that the coach is listening carefully.
everyday object
The coachee can be told to bring an object from his work, which he uses regularly/ is related to a certain point in his life. For many people it is easier to start talking about themselves if they can use this object as a starting point.

7. Contact/ opening the conversation
Questioning techniques:
Scaling questions: Scaling questions help to gain information to which extent the problem affects the actions and thought patterns of the coachee. Steve de Shazer used scaling questions in his solution-oriented therapy to reduce the complexity of clients´ problems and to generate options for (future) action.
Open questions: Open questions help to build trust, collect information about topics, cognitive patterns and emotions. Often the clients direct the conversation to the points which are important for them, if the coach leaves them the space to do that.

8. Contract
three types of clients (Steve de Shazer):
visitors: people who start a coaching process because they were told to do that, for example by their boss.
complainants: These people complain about what other people are doing to them or what other people are like. These are problems the coach can not work on, because he/she can only work on the coachee´s situation and not “the others”.
customers: the customers seek help to change themselves and believe that they can change. With this type of clients a coach can start working.

9. key element: succesful communication

10. What does he want to say to her? Please choose a corner!
Darling, green traffic lights ahead!
What does he want to say to her? Please choose a corner!

11. Problem:
a simple phrase can be interpreted in different ways:
coaches have to be aware of this fact
therefore we will present you a communication theory by
Friedemann Schulz von Thun, a German psychologist

12. four sides to a message (Schulz von Thun 1981)
factual information
self-revelation
message
appeal
relationship

13. four sides to a message (Schulz von Thun 1981)
1. factual information
first of all a message includes facts
in our example we get to know something about the condition of the traffic lights
If a disturbance occurs in a communication about objective goals there are two strategies to cope with this situation:
1 ´this does not belong here`: common point of view, appeal for dicipline
2 ´interruptions have priority`(Ruth Cohn - tci): courage to change to meta-communication by emphasising the other sides to a message
vital aspect of objective communication is comprehensibility:
simplicity, structure, briefness, additional stimulation

14. four sides to a message (Schulz von Thun 1981)
2. relationship
By the way to adress someone I express what I think of him/her and define the relationship between him/her and me.
Model: attitude-cross
appreciation
control
freedom of choice
disrespect

15. four sides to a message (Schulz von Thun 1981)
3. self-revelation
by communicating everyone reveals something about him- or herself ´sample of personality`
this side is psychologically explosive, because it is connected to the fear of revealing something which others can interprete negatively
senders tend to take care and use energy to create their self-revelation by using certain techniques like impressing, facade, self-reduction
for succesful communication Schulz von Thun suggests
- congruency between inner experiences, consciousness and communication
- selective authenticity: clarity of own emotions and communication

16. four sides to a message (Schulz von Thun 1981)
4. appeal
by saying something usually the sender of a message wants to achieve something. The problem of influence and manipulation is located here.
different to the other three sides, which describe what is, this side is pointed towards the future because of the anticipated effect.
appeals can be send
- open: direct expression of the sender´s wish
- hidden: often unconscious behaviour. To reveal hidden appeals it is useful not to ask for the (past) causes but for the goals the behaviour is aiming at.

17. the four-eared receiver (Schulz von Thun 1981)
self-revelation ear
What does he/she say about him-/herself?
What kind of person is this?
fact ear
What is the issue?
relationship ear
What does the other think about me?
How is he/she talking to me?
appeal ear
What should I do, think, feel?

18. four sides to a message (Schulz von Thun 1981)
essential findings for coaches
- communication/messages can consist of multiple layers
senders and receivers tend to focus on one of the four sides and do not necessarily tend to all sides of the message
succesful communication has to make sure both sender and receiver understand each other and which side they are focussing
meta-communication is a useful tool to avoid or clear misunderstandings

19. coaching interventions
already learned:
yes-set
scaling questions
open questions
now we will introduce to you some more questioning techniques
based on systemic coaching

20. Systemic coaching
theoretical point of origin: the coachee is part of a social system, e.g. of a familiy, a working team, etc.
A systemic coach considers problems as problems within this system.
A problem is a consequence of communication and interaction between persons. That´s why the coaching process is about changing the attitudes and interactions within the relevant social system.

21. Systemic coaching
How to change attitudes and interactions?
Social systems are communicative closed systems, obtaining their structure by confirming it’s elements in a permanent way. Within a system every behavior does make sense. This sense is connected to the relation pattern within the system.
To achieve change within the coachee’s system, the coach needs to provoke some kind of system error to disturb the pattern.
Therefore a coach can use e.g. circular questions.

22. Circular Questioning
is an questioning technique in systemic coaching that opens up a new way of thinking for the coachee. The coachee changes his/her own perspective to a perspective of another individual in the relevant social system. Beeing asked circular questions, the coachee has to think in a round about way.
With the help of circular questions the coachee becomes empathic and understands other role demands by changing his/her perspective.
Examples
´What does your mother think about your problem?`
´Peter, what does your mother feel like, if she sees your father crying?`
´If your boss would be here now, what would he say if he’d be asked why he always shouts at you?`

23. but do not push it too hard…

24. Goals of circular questioning
collect information about the communication context of the coachee
make communication offers transparent for all
disturb frozen patterns of communication, behavior and relationship
spread ideas for new patterns of interpretation and options

25. the following question techniques can be used as standard questions (non-circular) but also combined with a circular perspective
1 Questions of difference
To describe a phenomenon it is useful to separate them from other phenomenons. It is important to distinguish between describing, explaining and evaluating, so the coachee understands a phenomenon is not necessarily connected to his/her subjective perspective.
Questions of difference can be divided into questions of quality and questions of quantity of differences
Example for quantitative differences:
something is better/worse or sth. is more/less

26. 1.1 Questions of classification (qualitative differences)
Aim at qualitative differences
Example:
Who is the most active/adventurous in your familiy
Who is the least active...

27. 2. 1 problem-oriented questions
These questions focus the part each protagonist takes to maintain the problem
Examples:
a)´What can you do to feel even worse?`
Combined with circular aspects: `What could your boss do to make you feel even worse?`
b) The what-if-question:
´How would you have to behave, so that the others would believe your problem came back, even though it has not?`

28. 2. 2 solution-oriented questions
These questions focus improvement
Examples:
a) Wonderquestion: What if a fairy took away the problem next night? What will be different tomorrow?
Combined with circular perpecticve: ´Who would recognise first that the situation has changed and in which aspect?`
b) Questions of exceptions from the problem:
´When did the problem not occur?`
c) Questions for resources:
´Which aspects of your life should remain as they are?`