1. Vince Apple-Chiarella

2. Professionalism  Arrival time Be earlier than you need to be, in case something happens. Consistent late arrivers make a bad impression.  Candor with coaches & players Showing you know a coach can alienate the other. Be aware of how it looks. ARs should follow CR’s lead when conversing with players.  Appearance Be aware your appearance does tell a story.

3. Preparation  Research Who’s been carded? Why have they been carded? When were they carded? Wins/Losses  Team background Cultural differences provide different challenges.  Leagues Know the league (high school) rules.

4. Know Your Role  Criticizing coaching decisions Don’t waste halftime talking about coaching. Other things to worry about  Ball kid? Are you the referee or the ball kid? Can lead to apparent impartiality  Control what is controllable Ball pressure – easy to control Rosters – get the rosters so you can control the bench Take care of the simple stuff ahead of time.

5. Being present  “Mindfulness” – be mindful of why you’re there  Put your phone away Be with your team. Making phone calls/texts/etc put a distance between you and your team.  Be involved in pre game discussion Doesn’t need to be extremely long When you’re having it, be involved. Be an active listener.  Focus on your game Focus on the game you’re doing Try to avoid all those stories we love to tell

6. Ability to adapt (flexibility)  Different expectations at different levels Age Level of play U12s don’t need refs arriving 60 minutes before  Games change (during) Score goes from 0-0 to 5-0: maybe deflates the game Score goes from 3-0 to 3-3: maybe game gets hot  Situations change (in game)  Jekyll/Hyde You’ll need to be both at times ○ Sometimes you need to be the nice guy ○ Sometimes you need that edge Sometimes you shouldn’t be approachable

7. Mental Fortitude  Getting past mistakes Sometimes you can just say “my bad” ○ Don’t do this often ○ Most effective when you miss advantage call  Dealing with dissent Be mentally strong and composed enough to distinguish not-quite-dissent from dissent  Wild games You need the mind to “take a step back” and figure out what’s happening. You may not be able to bring them back down to earth, but at least you can get them off the moon. Relaxation techniques – centering yourself  Fans

8. Guts (intestinal fortitude)  You have to have the courage and guts Tough calls Late PK Red cards ○ Cards not given because refs didn’t want to “create any problems” or “change the game.” ○ Not giving the card changes the game, too.

9. Respect  Good referees garner it in different ways  I give as much as I get Always start game very respectful Not their friend: “coach” Let the coaches lead; don’t start joking on your own  Players and coaches deserve it BUT SO DO WE  Find a way to acknowledge a coach without empowering them Lots of time coaches just want to be acknowledged ○ Though some just want to yell at you A signal, look, word

10. Imagination  I was asked if I had an active imagination My imagination stopped when the game started Lots of pre-game thinking about different scenarios But what about considering new ways to deal with situations during the game that achieve what you need Do YOU have imagination during your game? Thinking of what you’re going to say

11. Have a game plan  Can discuss during pre-game, but you can think about it even before then Injuries Odd situations Technical Area ○ Have a good idea about how you’re going to deal with issues in the technical area.