1. Biblical Relationships Grace Fellowship Church June 5, 2009 Pastor Teacher, Jim Rickard www.GraceDoctrine.org

2. Part 5 Problems Solving Inside the Marriage Eph 4:31-32

3. Three Divine rules designed to produce virtue in marriage: 1. Husbands love your wives, Eph 5:25. 2. Wives obey your husbands, Col 3:18. 3. Husbands & wives forgive each other as Christ forgave us, Eph 4:31-32. Three Divine rules designed to produce virtue in marriage: 1. Husbands love your wives, Eph 5:25. 2. Wives obey your husbands, Col 3:18. 3. Husbands & wives forgive each other as Christ forgave us, Eph 4:31-32.

4. 1) Bitterness as a part of the arrogance complex is a cause of malfunction in marriage.

5. 2) This is an appeal to the volition of a fragmented believer to use Problem- Solving Devices and Grace Assets to recover from cosmic involvement.

6. 3) The expression of malice is evil. Malice is both the desire and motivation to inflict misery, suffering, and injury on someone else.

7. 4) Being a believer you are a beneficiary of grace and should therefore exercise grace to others, especially your spouse.

8. 5) Compassion is maximum demonstration of your Impersonal and Unconditional love.

9. 6) Forgiveness is not a feeling, it is a commitment to forget the things that lie behind and focus on the present and what is ahead. Phil 3:13

10. 7) Forgiveness is a sign of nobility and excellence in executing the Christian way of life.

11. The Solution to Marital Problems: 1) The solution is the use of Impersonal Love for all mankind, combined with personal love for your spouse.

12. 2) The secret to a successful marriage is Maximum Bible Doctrine in your soul called the Life Beyond Gnosis. Eph 3:19

13. 3) Just as you have to grow up and mature in life, you have to grown up in marriage.

14. 4) Three times in life you must grow up, and each requires its own system of growing. a) When you are born. b) When you are born again. c) When you are married.

15. 5) People often fail as Christians because they do not grow up.

16. 6) The greatest people in life are those who grow up in all three categories.

17. 7) If you grow up spiritually, you will make it in the other two areas. If you fail to grow up spiritually, you will flunk in the other two areas.

18. Therefore, the married couple who does not metabolize Bible doctrine has no basis for resolving the problems of marriage.

19. The 5 Languages of Love: By Gary Chapman, “The Five Love Languages, how to express heartfelt commitment to your mate” 1992

20. If a spouse does not receive love expressed in their main love language, they do not feel loved.

21. Also, each spouse has a certain way that he or she expresses their love.

22. If your expression of love is not in the “love language” of your mate, then they will feel unloved.

23. 1) Words of Affirmation: Verbal compliments or words of appreciation; simple straightforward statements of affirmation; or words of encouragement. Eph 4:32; Heb 3:13

24. Heb 3:13, “But encourage one another day after day, as long as it is still called “Today,” so that none of you will be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.”

25. Prov 18:21, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue.”

26. 2) Quality of Time Giving your spouse your undivided attention; just the two of you, without distractions; focused attention; quality conversations and activities.

27. Prov 12:25, “Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs it down, but a good word makes it glad.”

28. Eccl 3:8a, “There is a time to love”.

29. 3) Receiving Gifts The act of giving gifts to your spouse. It is a visual symbol of love and can be something you purchase, found or made.

30. In addition, you can give the gift of self. Being there for your spouse when they need you.

31. 2 Cor 9:7-8, “Each one must do just as he has purposed in his heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, you may have an abundance for every good deed.”

32. 4) Acts of Service Doing things you know your spouse would like you to do, with a positive attitude. John 13:3-17; Mat 20:28

33. Gal 5:13, “For you were called to freedom, brethren; only do not turn your freedom into an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.”

34. 5) Physical Touch Holding hands, kissing, embracing, back rubs, massages and sexual intercourse. 1 Cor 7:1-5

35. Conclusion: First discover your spouses love language and secondly identifying the way you express love to your spouse.

36. Then work towards expressing your love in their love language, by applying the Biblical principles of Impersonal and Unconditional love.

37. Grace Fellowship Church Friday, June 5, 2009 Tape # 09F-005 Biblical Relationships, Part 5 Problem Solving Inside the Marriage Eph 4:31-32; Phil 3:13: Heb 3:13; 1 Cor 7:1-5 James H. Rickard Bible Ministries 2009