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Conflict Resolution Styles & Techniques Bob White

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1 Conflict Resolution Styles & Techniques Bob White 816-716-7736

2 Impact of Conflict in the IRS
The IRS Mission Provide America's taxpayers top quality service by helping them understand and meet their tax responsibilities and by applying the tax law with integrity and fairness to all. Unresolved conflict can have a negative impact on organizational performance. Wasted Energy and Resources = Reduced Compliance Wasted Time +

3 What Is Conflict? Conflict is defined as a disagreement over disputed issues or incompatible goals involving two or more parties.

4 Conflict Resolution Styles
Avoidance Accommodation Collaboration Competition Compromise

5 Conflict Resolution Styles
Avoidance Advantages – Allows tempers to cool – Not all issues need to be confronted Disadvantages – Significant conflicts can be ignored – Allows conflicts to fester Useful for – Heated emotional situations

6 Conflict Resolution Styles
Accommodation Advantages – Achieves short term goals – Effective for meeting deadlines Disadvantages – Breeds resentment – Destroys creativity – May lead to power struggles Useful for – Future leverage – When you are wrong

7 Conflict Resolution Styles
Competition Advantages – Helps one to focus – Motivates by challenging Disadvantages – All or nothing results – Alternatives not evaluated Useful for – Sports & Litigation

8 Conflict Resolution Styles
Compromise Advantages – Facilitates resolving competitive disputes – Allows for closure Disadvantages – Can bring about a mediocre solutions – Does not promote creativity Useful for – Situations where nothing else works – Fostering cordiality

9 Conflict Resolution Styles
Collaboration Advantages – Promotes problem-solving by identifying negative aspects of both sides – Ferrets out hidden agendas Disadvantages – Takes time – Cumbersome in emergencies Useful for – Long term relationships – Very important issues

10 What Is My Conflict Style?
Conflict situations are those in which the concerns of two people appear to be incompatible. In such situations, behaviors can be described along two basic dimensions:      l)   Assertiveness is the extent to which the individual attempts to satisfy his/her own concerns; and  2)  Cooperativeness is the extent to which the individual attempts to satisfy the other person’s concerns.

11 What Is My Conflict Style?
A Try to Win  Attempt to please others Try to strike a balance  Don't like to make waves  5. Take a head-in-the-sand approach 6. Have an aversion to risk 7. Put myself in the other person's shoes

12 What Is My Conflict Style?
8. Apply pressure to persuade others to see it my way 9. Postpone dealing with an issue  10.Insist on my own position  11.Submit to the other person's point of view  12. Find a quick solution 13. Withhold input  14. Defer to the concerns of others 

13 What Is My Conflict Style?
15. Make the best of a problem situation 16. Discuss issues in depth 17. Enjoy the gamesmanship 18. Develop multiple options 19. Adapt myself to the other's needs 20. Take no part in the conflict 21. Try a give and take approach

14 What Is My Conflict Style?
22. Look for mutually satisfying solutions  23. Push for a solution that meets my needs 24. Find the middle of the road approach 25. Look for a compromise 26. Try a team approach  27. Neglect my concerns to satisfy others  28.Seek to satisfy underlying concerns

15 What Is My Conflict Style?
29. Assert Power 30. Often lose sight of the bigger picture 31.Seek to maintain fairness 32.Consider the other person's feelings 33.Evade conflict 34. Am not afraid to confront conflict   35.Let well enough alone

16 What Is My Conflict Style?
1. Assertive – Competitive 2. Cooperative – Accommodating 3. Assertive/Cooperative – Collaborating 4. Cooperative – Accommodating 5. Unassertive/Uncooperative – Avoidance 6. Cooperative – Accommodating 7. Assertive/Cooperative – Collaborating

17 What Is My Conflict Style?
8. Assertive – Competitive 9. Unassertive/Uncooperative – Avoidance 10. Assertive – Competitive 11. Cooperative – Accommodating 12. Cooperative – Accommodating 13. Assertive – Competitive 14. Cooperative – Accommodating

18 What Is My Conflict Style?
15. Assertive/Cooperative – Compromising 16. Assertive – Competitive 17. Assertive – Competitive 18. Assertive – Competitive 19. Cooperative – Accommodating 20. Unassertive/Uncooperative – Avoidance 21. Assertive/Cooperative – Compromising

19 What Is My Conflict Style?
22. Assertive/Cooperative – Collaborating 23. Assertive – Competitive 24. Assertive/Cooperative – Compromising 25. Assertive/Cooperative – Compromising 26. Assertive/Cooperative – Collaborating 27. Cooperative – Accommodating 28. Assertive/Cooperative – Collaborating

20 What Is My Conflict Style?
29. Assertive – Competitive 30. Assertive – Competitive 31. Assertive/Cooperative – Compromising 32. Assertive/Cooperative – Collaborating 33. Unassertive/Uncooperative – Avoidance 34. Assertive – Competitive 35. Unassertive/Uncooperative – Avoidance

21 Seven Conflict Strategies
Define what the conflict is about. It’s not you versus me; it’s you and me versus the problem Identify your shared points of agreement rather than focusing on your one point of disagreement

22 Seven Conflict Strategies
Sort out interpretations from facts Develop a sense of forgiveness Learn to listen actively Purify your heart

23 Seven Conflict Techniques
Listen without interruption - Don’t defend yourself – just listen. Ask questions to increase understanding Restate key points to establish common ground Give the other person the benefit of the doubt

24 Seven Conflict Strategies
5. Control your emotions -Don’t build resentment -If you can control your emotions, you can handle the situation Think before you respond - State your position calmly 7. Agree on a solution

25 Benefits of the 7 Strategies
There are 4 benefits to the above 7 Steps: Shifting attention away from you and toward the problem at hand Very often defuses anger an resentment Opens the door for you to gain some valuable information Lets your management team know you are a team player

26 Dealing with Difficult People
“THE BEST WAY OUT OF A DIFFICULT SITUATION IS THROUGH IT!” Put problem people in proper perspective Don’t expect difficult people to change Learn to respond as well as to listen Give and request constant feedback Deal directly and discreetly Be straightforward and unemotional Be gracious

27 BATNA Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement (BATNA)
The BATNA is what you will do independent of the other party should the negotiation fail Before negotiating, know what you’ll do if you walk away The benefits of having a BATNA include: Increased confidence Ability to focus on the negotiations

28 Self Mediation Process
Find a time to talk A conversation about having a conversation No communication = no solution Plan the context Remove land mines Protect the dialogue Talk it out Use natural forces toward harmony to produce breakthroughs Reach agreement Plan the future

29 Conclusion “With preparation and practice, dealing with conflict doesn’t have to feel like walking a tightrope!”


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