1. REVISING ESSAY 2

2. Go Over Final Week Schedule Discuss Extra Credit Pass out handout Questions?

3. Avoiding Common Problems In Essays Problem 1: The Topic is Too Broad How to Identify the Problem: You feel overwhelmed: If you feel like the topic is too difficult or you have too much to say and you don’t know what to say next, you probably have a topic that is too broad. Another possibility is that you have chosen a topic you do not know enough about. You are writing general statements and not explaining them fully: If your topic is too broad and you have too much to cover, you will be forced to make broad, sweeping, generalized statement that you cannot fully explain or give specific examples of. How to Fix the Problem: Narrow down your topic! Check out the topic-narrowing techniques in Chapter 11, p. 295. Another way to narrow down a topic is to ask question that will limit what you are really discussing. Check out these question on page 500

4. Problem 2: The Topic is Too Narrow Identify the Problem: After a paragraph or two, you have nothing left to say: If you have explained what you are discussing AND given specific examples, and you still run out of ideas and keep repeating yourself, your topic might be too narrow. Your topic does not seem important or interesting: If it isn’t interesting to you, it won’t be interesting to your reader. You probably need to change topics. Your essay is focusing on small facts and details: You can widen your essays focus by connecting your narrow topic to another, related topic and asking yourself what they have in common. Check out tips on broadening a too-narrow topic on page 501-502 For example: I am writing an informative essay about lighting a campfire. After one or two paragraphs of facts and tips, I’m done! I can widen my topic to looking at how to light a campfire AND how to cook easy campfire-friendly meals. What do both of these have in common? Going “rough” camping successfully! Maybe I should write my paper about that. NOTICE however, I am not widening my paper to write about ALL forms of camping—trailer camping, RV camping, cabin camping, day camping, etc. THAT would be too broad.

5. Problem 3: Thesis Needs Revision Identify the Problem: The essay does not explain or support the thesis (focusing idea). The thesis does not “cover” all the topics in the essay (umbrella). The thesis is vague and unclear The thesis makes a direct announcement or asks a question Fix the Problem: Answer the Thesis Revision Questions on page 502 Rewrite your Thesis several different ways. What works best?

6. Problem 4: The Essay is Underdeveloped Identify the Problem: The essay rambles and seems unfocused. The essay repeats information too often and just says the same thing over and over in different ways. The essay makes general statement but does not support them with examples and specifics. The essay lacks facts, examples, comparisons, or reasons. Fix the Problem (more on p. 503) Make sure your topic is not too broad or too narrow. Delete sentences that don’t add anything new to the essay. Highlight sentences and ideas where you could further develop, explain, or give specific examples. Add the needed development through explanation, examples, and specifics. Make sure each paragraph has a clear point and that all the sentences and details support that point.

7. Problem 5: The Essay is Disorganized Identify the Problem: Does every paragraph support or explain something about the thesis (focusing topic)? Are all the paragraphs on-topic? Do you make it clear how each idea relates to another idea by explaining thoroughly and using transitions? Fix the Problem: “Label” what each your paragraphs is about in an outline Make sure all the sentences in that paragraph have something to do with that topic label Use the Revision Map advice on page 505.

8. REVIEW USE OF SOURCES

9. Four Basic Rules for Avoiding Plagiarism 1. Make sure all word-for-word quotes have quote marks showing where they begin and end. 2. Make sure to make the difference between your ideas and your sources’ ideas clear when paraphrasing. 3. Identify where each quote OR paraphrased idea came from in the body of your paper using in- text citations. 4. Make sure that each source you quote OR paraphrase in your paper is correctly listed on your Works Cited page. Pass out the Incorporating Sources Handout

10. How to Avoid Drop-in Quotes: One of the risk factors for heart disease is alcohol consumption. The American Heart Association website states, “drinking too much alcohol can raise blood pressure, cause heart failure and lead to stroke” (“Risk Factors”). Notice that the quote is a part of a sentence written by the author of the paper. Adding “(Insert source name here) states” to the beginning of a quotation is a quick, easy way to fix drop-in quotes. This is called a “signal phrase.” You are encouraged to embed your quote into your own sentence: Example: People worried about heart disease should seriously limit how much they drink because “drinking too much alcohol can raise blood pressure” or even cause death or stroke (“Risk Factors”).

11. The “Quote Sandwich” This is a way to integrate quotes into your paper smoothly and avoid drop-in quotes. The first piece of “bread” Introduce quote, possibly mention author, connect quote to what you were saying before. The “Meat” Your quote, correctly cited with in-text citation. The second piece of “bread” Interpretation/explanation of quote (NOT simply rewording the quote), connect quote to what you will say next.

12. Online Examples of Quote Sandwiches http://www.csun.edu/~hflrc006/quote.html https://sites.google.com/site/sasamtani/quote_sandwich 003.jpg https://sites.google.com/site/sasamtani/quote_sandwich 003.jpg Notice that both of these examples make the quote a part of a sentence the essay author wrote, and notice that both examples give credit to the source’s author.

13. To Cite, or Not to Cite You do not have to cite facts that are undisputed common knowledge. – Ex: The Battle of Gettysburg began on July 1, 1863. – Ex: Water is made up of two hydrogen atoms and one oxygen atom. – Ex: Dublin is the capital of the Republic of Ireland. However, once you start needing to use ideas about these common, everyday facts that you found in your sources, you must cite the source of the idea. When in doubt, cite! And if you have time, ask!

14. Some Myths about Plagiarism Myth 1: As long as I have a source on my works cited page, I don’t have to mention it in the body of my paper. WRONG! Any time you use ideas or words from a source, you must include an in-text citation. Myth 2: As long as I change one or two words in a quote, I don’t have to put quote marks around it or do a citation. WRONG! Changing one or two words in a quote and replacing them with synonyms is STILL PLAGIARISM if you keep the original ideas and/or sentence structure. Myth 3: As long as I paraphrase correctly, using my own words and sentence structure to express an idea, I don’t need an in-text citation. WRONG! Even if you use your own words, if the idea originally came from somewhere else, you must cite it.

15. Myths about Plagiarism Myth 4: I don’t need to cite exact words, ideas or information I find on the internet. WRONG! Treat your internet sources with the same respect you have for your print or online database sources. Myth 5: It is appropriate to use an old essay from a friend, buy an essay, or have someone help me write an essay using his or her wording instead of mine. WRONG! All of these are called collusion, and they are all plagiarism. Myth 6: I won’t get caught if I plagiarize. WRONG! Plagiarism is quite obvious to most professors, and many of them use plagiarism detecting software.

16. Resources to Help you Avoid Plagiarism Online plagiarism tutorial and quizzes from Simon Fraser University http://www.lib.sfu.ca/node/10442http://www.lib.sfu.ca/node/10442 Plagiarism Self Test from Western Carolina University http://www.wcu.edu/12083.asp http://www.wcu.edu/12083.asp University of Southern Mississippi’s Plagiarism Tutorial http://www.lib.usm.edu/legacy/plag/plagiarismtutorial.p hp http://www.lib.usm.edu/legacy/plag/plagiarismtutorial.p hp

17. OPEN THE POWER POINT ON COMMAS, APOSTROPHES, AND PARALLELISM.