1. Emotional and Social Development in Middle Childhood
Chapter 10, to page 351

2. Erikson’s Theory: Industry versus Inferiority
Psychological conflict of middle childhood: industry versus inferiority
Resolved positively when children develop a sense of competence at useful skills and tasks
Shift from make-believe play to realistic accomplishment
in industrialized nations, the beginning of formal schooling marks the transition to middle childhood
School entrance brings the beginning of literacy training, which prepares children for a vast array of specialized careers
In school, children discover their own and others’ unique capacities, learn the value of division of labor, and develop a sense of moral commitment and responsibility
The negative outcome of this stage is inferiority, lack of confidence in the ability to do things well
This sense of inadequacy can develop when family life has not prepared children for school life or when teachers and peers destroy children’s feelings of competence and mastery with negative responses
Erikson’s sense of industry combines several developments of middle childhood
A positive but realistic self-concept, pride in accomplishment, moral responsibility, and cooperative participation with agemates

3. Self-Understanding
In middle childhood, children become able to describe themselves in terms of psychological traits, to compare their own characteristics with those of their peers, and to speculate about the causes of their strengths and weaknesses
These transformations in self-understanding have a major impact on children’s self-esteem

4. Self-Concept
During the school years, children refine their self-concept, organizing their observations of behaviors and internal states into general dispositions (major change occurs between ages 8-11)
Ex. 11 year old: “My name is A. I’m a human being. I’m a girl. I’m a truthful person. I’m not pretty. I do so-so at school. I’m a very good cellist. I’m a very good pianist. I’m a little bit tall for my age. I like several boys. I like several girls. I’m old-fashioned. I play tennis. I am a very good swimmer. I try to be helpful. I’m always ready to be friends with anybody. Mostly I’m good, but I lose my temper. I’m not well-liked by some girls and boys. I don’t know if any boys like me or not.”
In middle childhood, children tend to emphasize competencies rather than specific behaviors
Ex. “I’m a very good pianist.”
They can clearly describe their personality, including both positive and negative traits, rather than describing themselves in all-or-none ways
Ex. “truthful” but “I lose my temper”

5. Self-Concept
School-age children often make social comparisons – judgments of their appearance, abilities, and behavior in relation to those of others
Where 4-6 year olds can compare their own performance to that of one peer, older children can compare multiple individuals, including themselves
What accounts for these revisions in self-concept?
Cognitive development affects the changing structure of self
Children are now able to coordinate several aspects of a situation when reasoning about the physical world (ex. Conservation of liquid)
In the social realm, they combine typical experiences and behaviors into psychological dispositions, blend positive and negative characteristics, and compare their own characteristics with those of many other peers

6. Self-Concept
Another influence on the content of self-concept is feedback from others
Sociologist George Mead proposed that a well-organized psychological self emerges when the child adopts a view of the self that resembles others’ attitudes toward the child
Perspective-taking skills, especially an improved ability to infer what others are thinking, are crucial for the development of a self-concept based on personality traits
As the internalize others’ expectations, children form an ideal self, which they use to evaluate their real self
Children increasingly look to more people beyond the family for information about themselves as they enter a wider range of settings in school and community
As children move into adolescence self-concept is increasingly vested in feedback from close friends
The content of self-concept also varies between cultures and subcultures
Recent research shows that in their self-descriptions, U.S. children list more personal attributes, whereas Chinese children list more attributes involving group membership and relationships

7. Development of Self-Esteem
Recall that most preschoolers have extremely high self- esteem
But at children enter school and receive must more feedback about how well they perform compared with their peers, self- esteem differentiates and also adjusts to a more realistic level

8. Hierarchically Structured Self-Esteem
By age 6-7, children have formed at least 4 broad self-esteems – academic, social, and physical/athletic competence, and physical appearance
Within each broad category, are more refined categories that become increasingly distinct with age
Viewing the self in terms of stable dispositions permits school-age children to combine these self-evaluations into a general psychological image of themselves – an overall sense of self-esteem
Self-esteem takes on a hierarchical structure
Perceived physical appearance correlates more strongly with overall self-esteem than any other factor
Emphasis on appearance, in the media and in society, has major implications for young people’s overall satisfaction with themselves

9. Hierarchy of Self-Esteem (example)
General Self-Esteem
Academic Competence
Language Arts
Math
Other Subjects
Social Competence
Relationship with Peers
Relationship with Parents
Physical/Athletic Competence
Outdoor Games
Sports
Physical Appearance

10. Changes in Level of Self-Esteem
Self-Esteem declines during the 1st few years of elementary school as children evaluate themselves in various areas
Typically, the drop is not great enough to be harmful
Most (but not all) children appraise their characteristics and competencies realistically while maintaining an attitude of self- respect
Then, from 4th grade on, self-esteem rises for the majority of young people, who feel especially good about their peer relationships and athletic capabilities

11. Influences on Self-Esteem
From middle childhood on, individual differences in self-esteem become more stable
Positive relationships emerge between self-esteem and success at valued activities
Ex. Academic self-esteem predicts how important, useful, and enjoyable children judge school subjects to be, their willingness to try hard, and their achievement
Ex. Children with high social self-esteem are consistently better-liked by their classmates
Ex. Sense of athletic competence is positively associated with investment and performance in sports
However, a profile of low self-esteem in all areas is linked to anxiety, depression, and increasing antisocial behavior

12. Influences on Self-Esteem: Culture
Cultural forces profoundly affect self-esteem
A strong emphasis on social comparison in school may explain why Chinese and Japanese children, despite higher academic achievement, score lower in self-esteem than North American children
In Asian classrooms, competition is tough and achievement pressure is high
At the same time, because their culture values social harmony, Asian children tend to be reserved about judging themselves positively but generous in their praise of others
Gender-stereotyped expectations also affect self-esteem
In one study, the more 5-8 year old girls talked with friends about the way people look, watched TV shows focusing on physical appearance, and perceived their friends as valuing thinness, the lower their physical self-esteem and overall self-worth were a year later
In academic self-judgments
Girls score higher in language arts self-esteem
Boys score higher in math, science, and physical/athletic self-esteem, even when children of equal skill levels are compared
African American children tend to have slightly higher self-esteem than their Caucasian agemates
Possible because of warm, extended families and stronger sense of ethnic pride, which most Caucasians lack

13. Influences on Self-Esteem: Child-Rearing Practices
Children whose parents use an authoritative child-rearing style feel especially good about themselves
Warm, positive parenting lets children know that they are accepted as competent and worthwhile
Firm but appropriate expectations, backed up with explanations, help children evaluate their own behavior against reasonable standards
Controlling parents (those who too often help or make decisions for their child) communicate a sense of inadequacy to their children
Having parents who are repeatedly disapproving and insulting is linked to low self-esteem
Children subjected to controlling parenting need constant reassurance, and many rely heavily on peers to affirm their self-worth (which is a risk factor for adjustment difficulties, including aggression and antisocial behavior)

14. Influences on Self-Esteem: Child-Rearing Practices
Overindulgent parenting is correlated with unrealistically high self-esteem, which also undermines development
These children tend to lash out at challenges to their overblown self-images and, thus, are also likely to be hostile and aggressive
American cultural values have increasingly emphasized a focus on the self that may lead parents to indulge children and boost their self-esteem too much
The self-esteem of U.S. youths rose sharply from the 1970s-1990s, a period in which most popular parenting literature advised promoting children’s self- esteem
Yet, compared with previous generations, American youths are achieving less well and displaying more antisocial behavior and other adjustment problems
Research has show that children DO NOT benefit from complements (“You’re terrific!) that have no basis in real attainment
When children strive for worthwhile goals, achievement fosters self-esteem, which, in turn, promotes good performance

15. Influences on Self-Esteem: Making Achievement-Related Attributions
Attributions are our common, everyday explanations for the causes of behavior (our answers to the question “Why did I or another person do that?”)
School-age children who are high in academic self-esteem and motivation make mastery-oriented attributions
They credit their success to ability (which they can improve through trying hard) and their failures to factors that can be changed, such as insufficient effort
Children who develop learned helplessness attribute their failures to ability, but when they succeed, conclude that external factors, such as luck, are responsible
They believe that ability is fixed and cannot be changed by trying hard
When a task is difficult, these children experience an anxious loss of control, the give up with out really trying

16. Influences on Self-Esteem: Making Achievement-Related Attributions
Children’s attributions affect their goals
Mastery oriented children
Seek information on how best to increase their ability through effort
Hence, their performance improves over time
Learned helplessness children
Focus on obtaining positive and avoiding negative evaluations of their fragile sense of ability
Over time, their ability not longer predicts how well they do
Because they fail to connect effort with success they do not develop the metacognitive and self-regulatory skills necessary for high achievement
Lack of effective learning strategies, reduced persistence, low performance, and a sense of loss of control sustain one another in a vicious cycle

17. Influences on Achievement-Related Attributions
Parental communication plays a key role in children’s attributions
Learned-helplessness children tend to have parents who believe their child is not very capable and has to work harder to succeed
Ex. When the child fails, the parent might say “You can’t do that, can you? It’s OK if you quit.”
Ex. After the child succeeds, the parent might give feedback that evaluates the child’s traits, “You’re so smart!”
Parents of learned-helplessness children tend to give them feedback in the form of trait statements (“You’re so smart!”)
Trait statements promote a fixed view of ability, leading children to question their competence in the face of setbacks and to retreat from challenge
Teachers’ messages also affect children’s attributions
Teachers who emphasize learning over getting good grades tend to have mastery- oriented students
Students with unsupportive teachers tend to regard their performance as externally controlled (ex. by luck or teachers)
They withdraw from learning activities and their achievement declines (which lead children to doubt their ability further)

18. Influences on Achievement-Related Attributions
For some children performance is especially likely to be undermined by negative adult feedback
Despite their higher achievement, girls more often than boys blame their poor performance on ability
Girls tend to receive messages from teachers and parents that their ability is at fault with they do not do well, and negative stereotypes (ex. Girls are weak in math) reduce their interest and effort
Low-SES ethnic minority students often receive les favorable feedback from teachers
Especially when assigned to homogeneous groups of poorly achieving students (which typically results in a drop in academic self-esteem and performance)
Cultural values affect the likelihood that children will develop learned helplessness
Because of the high value their culture places on effort and self-improvement, Asians pay more attention to failure than to success, because failure indicates were corrective action is needed
Americans, in contrast, focus more on success because it enhances self-esteem

19. Fostering a Mastery-Oriented Approach
An intervention called attribution retaining encourages learned-helplessness children to believe that they can overcome failure by exerting more effort
Children are given tasks difficult enough that they will experience some failure, followed by repeated feedback that helps them revise their attributions – “You can do it if you try harder.”
After they succeed, children receive additional feedback – “You’re really good at this.” or “You really tried hard on that one.” – so that they attribute their success to both ability and effort, not chance
Another approach is to encourage low-effort children to focus less on grades and more on mastering a task for its own sake
Instruction in effective strategies and self-regulation is also vital, to compensate for development lost in this area and to ensure that renewed effort pays off
Attribution retaining is best begun early, before children’s views of themselves become hard to change

20. Emotional Development
Greater self-awareness and social sensitivity support gains in emotional competence in middle childhood
Changes take place in experience of self-conscious emotions, emotional understanding, and emotional self-regulation

21. Self-Conscious Emotions
In middle childhood, the self-conscious emotions of pride and guilt become clearly governed by personal responsibility and no longer depend on adult monitoring
Children experience pride in new accomplishments and guilt over a transgression, even when no adult is present
Also, children no longer report guilt for any mishap, as they did earlier in the preschool years, now they only report guild for intentional wrongdoing, such as lying, ignoring responsibilities, or cheating
Pride motivates children to take on challenges
Guilt prompts children to make amends and strive for self-improvement
Harsh reprimands from adults can lead to intense shame (ex. “Everyone else can do it! Why can’t you?”), which is particularly destructive
A shame-induced, sharp drop in self-esteem can trigger withdrawal, depression, and intense anger at those who participated in the shame-evoking situation

22. Emotional Understanding
School-age children, unlike preschoolers, are likely to explain emotion by referring to internal states (like happy or sad thoughts) rather than to external events
Around age 8, children become aware that they can experience more than one emotion at a time, each of which can be positive or negative and differ in intensity
Ex. A child can be happy they got a present from their grandmother, but also sad that it was a sweater and socks rather than the action figure they really wanted
Appreciating mixed emotions helps children realize that people’s expressions may not reflect their true feelings, and also fosters awareness of self-conscious emotions
Between ages 8-9, they improve sharply in ability to distinguish pride from happiness and surprise
They also understand that pride combines 2 sources of happiness (joy in accomplishment and joy that a significant person recognized that accomplishment)
They can reconcile contradictory facial and situational cues in figuring out another's feelings and can use information about “what might have happened” to predict how people will feel in a new situation

23. Emotional Understanding
As with self-understanding, gains in emotional understanding are supported by cognitive development and social experiences
Especially adults’ sensitivity to children’s feelings and willingness to discuss emotions
Together, cognitive development and social experience lead to a rise in empathy
As children move closer to adolescence, advances in perspective taking permit an empathetic response not just to people’s immediate distress but also to their general life condition

24. Emotional Self-Regulation
Rapid gains in emotional self-regulation occur in middle childhood
As children engage in social comparison and care more about peer approval, they must learn to manage negative emotion that threatens their self-esteem
By age 10, most children are able to shift adaptively between 2 general strategies for managing emotion
Problem-centered coping – children appraise the situation as changeable, identify the difficulty, and decide what to so about it
If problem solving doesn’t work, they engage in emotion-centered coping – internal, private, and aimed at controlling distress when little can be done about an outcome
Ex. When faced with an anxiety-provoking test or an angry friend, older school- age children view problem solving and seeking social support as the best strategies
But when outcomes are beyond their control, like after getting a bad grade on a test, they opt for distraction or try to redefine the situation, “Things could be worse. There’ll be another test.”

25. Emotional Self-Regulation
Through interacting with parents, teachers, and peers, school-age children become more knowledgeable about socially approved ways to display negative emotion
They increasingly prefer verbal strategies (ex. “Please stop pushing and wait your turn.”) to crying, sulking, or aggression
When emotional self-regulation has developed well, children acquire a sense of emotional self-efficacy – a feeling of being in control of their emotional experience
This fosters favorable self-image and an optimistic outlook
The parents of children who are emotionally well-regulated respond sensitively and helpfully when the child is distressed
In contrast, poorly regulated children often experience hostile, dismissive parental reactions to distress and are overwhelmed by negative emotion

26. Understanding Others: Perspective Taking
Middle childhood brings major advances in perspective taking – the capacity to imagine what other people may be thinking and feeling
These changes support self-concept and self-esteem, understanding of others, and a wide variety of social skills
Robert Selman’s 5-stage sequence describes changes in perspective-taking skill
Asked children from preschool age through adolescence to respond to social dilemmas in which characters have differing information and opinions about an event
At first, children have only a limited idea of what other people might be thinking and feeling, but later become more aware that people can interpret the same event differently
Soon, they can reflect on how another person might regard their own thoughts, feelings, and behavior
Finally, older children and adolescents can evaluate two people’s perspective simultaneously
Children gain in perspective taking as a result of experiences in which adults and peers explain their viewpoints
Good perspective takers are more likely to display empathy and sympathy and to handle difficult social situations effectively
Children with poor social skills have great difficulty imagining others’ thoughts and feelings and often mistreat others without feeling guilt or remorse

27. Stage
Age Range
Description
Level 0: Undifferentiated perspective taking
3-6
Children recognize that self and others can have different thoughts and feelings, but they frequently confuse the two
Level 1: Social-informational perspective taking
4-9
Children understand that different perspectives may result because people have access to different information
Level 2: Self-reflective perspective taking
7-12
Children can “step into another person’s shoes” and view their own thoughts, feelings, and behavior from the other person’s perspective and know that others can do the same
Level 3: Third-party perspective taking
10-15
Children can step outside a 2-person situation and imagine how the self and other are viewed from the point of view of a 3rd, impartial party
Level 4: Societal perspective taking
14-adult
Individual understand that 3rd-party perspective taking can be influenced by one or more systems of larger societal values

28. Moral Development
Recall that preschoolers pick up many morally relevant behavior through modeling and reinforcement
By middle childhood, they have had time to internalize rules for good conduct
Ex. “It’s good to help others in trouble.” or “It’s wrong to take something that doesn’t belong to you.”
This change leads children to become considerably more independent and trustworthy
We have also seen that children do not just copy their morality from others
As the cognitive-developmental approach emphasizes, they actively think about right and wrong
An expanding social world, the capacity to consider more information when reasoning, and perspective taking lead moral understanding to advance greatly in middle childhood

29. Moral and Social-Conventional Understanding
During the school years, children construct a flexible appreciation of moral rules
By age 7-8, children no longer believe that all truth-telling is good and ally lying is bad, they also consider prosocial and antisocial intentions
The evaluate certain types of truthfulness very negatively (ex. Bluntly telling a classmate that you don’t like her drawing)
Comparisons of Chinese and North American children provide evidence that cultural values affect children’s moral judgments about truthfulness and lying
Both Chinese and North American children consider lying about antisocial acts “very naughty”
Chinese children (influenced by collectivist values) more often rate lying favorably when the intention is modesty
Ex. When a student who has thoughtfully picked up litter from the playground says “I didn’t do it.”
Similarly, Chinese children are more likely to favor lying to support the group at the expense of the individual
Ex. Saying you’re sick if you are a poor singer so you won’t harm your class’s chances of winning a singing competition
In contrast, North American children more often favor lying to support the individual at the expense of the group
Ex. Claiming that a friend who is a poor speller is actually a good speller because he wants to participate in a spelling competition

30. Moral and Social-Conventional Understanding
As their ideas about justice take into account more variables, children begin to clarify and link moral imperatives and social conventions
Ex. School-age children distinguish social conventions with a clear purpose (like not running in school hallways to prevent injuries) from ones with no obvious justification (like crossing a “forbidden” line on the playground)
With age, they also realize that people’s intentions and contexts of their actions affect the moral implications of violating a social convention
In one study, 8-10 year olds stated that because of a flag’s symbolic value, burning it to express disapproval of a country or to start a cooking fire is worse than burning it accidentally
But they recognize that flag burning is a form of freedom of expression, and most agreed that it would be acceptable in a country that treated its citizens unfairly
Children in Western and non-Western cultures reason similarly about moral and social- conventional concerns
When a directive is fair and caring, such as telling children to stop fighting or to share candy, school-age children view it as right, regardless of who states it (a principal, a teacher, or a child with no authority)
Even in Korean culture (which places high value on obeying authority) 7-11 year olds negatively evaluate a teacher’s or principal’s order to engage in immoral acts, such as stealing or refusing to share

31. Understanding Individual Rights
When children challenge adult authority, they typically do so within the personal domain (choices such as hairstyle, friends, and leisure activities)
As their grasp of moral imperatives and social conventions strengthens, so does their conviction that certain choices are up to the individual
Ex. A Colombian child demonstrated this defense of personal control when he was asked if a teacher had the right to tell a student where to sit during circle time and, in the absence of a moral reason from the teacher, the child declared “She should be able to sit wherever she wants!”
As early as age 6, children view freedom of speech and religion as individuals rights – even if laws exist that deny those rights
They also regard laws that discriminate against individuals (such as denying certain people access to healthcare or education) as wrong and worthy of violating
Older school-age children place limits on individual choice, and prejudice usually declines in middle childhood
Ex. 4th graders faced with conflicting moral and personal concerns – such as whether or not to befriend a new classmate of a different race, gender, or other difference – typically decide in favor of kindness and fairness

32. Understanding Diversity and Inequality
By the early school years, children associate power and privilege with white people and poverty and inferior status with other ethnicities
They do not necessarily acquire these views directly from parents or friends
Rather, they seem to pick up prevailing societal attitudes from implicit messages in the media and elsewhere in their environments

33. In-Group and Out-Group Biases: Development of Prejudice
By age 5-7, white children generally evaluate their own racial group more favorably than other peer groups
While many minority children of this age evaluate their own group more negatively than the white majority
With age, children pay more attention to inner traits and begin to understand that people who look different do not think, feel, or act differently
After age 7-8, both majority and minority children express in- group favoritism, and white children’s prejudice against out- group members declines

34. In-Group and Out-Group Biases: Development of Prejudice
The extent to which children hold racial and ethnic biases depends on several factors
A fixed view of personality traits: Children who believe that personality traits are fixed rather than changeable often judge others as either “good” or “bad”
They ignore circumstances and readily form prejudices based on limited information
Ex. They might infer that “a new child at school who tells a lie to get other kids to like her” is just a bad person
Overly high self-esteem: Children (and adults) with overly high self-esteem are more likely to hold racial and ethnic prejudices
These individuals seem to belittle individuals or groups to justify their own extremely favorable self-evaluation
A social world in which people are sorted into groups: the more adults highlight group distinctions for children and the less interracial contact children experience, the more likely children are to display prejudice

35. Reducing Prejudice
Providing opportunities for intergroup contact, especially long-term contact in neighborhoods, schools, and communities, is effective
This provides racially and ethnically different children the opportunity to work toward common goals and become personally acquainted
Classrooms that expose children to ethnic diversity, teach them to value those differences, directly address the damage caused by prejudice, and encourage perspective taking and empathy both prevent children from forming negative biases and reduce already acquired biases
Another approach is to teach children to view others’ traits as changeable
Discussing the many possible influences on traits with children
The more children believe that people can change their personalities, the more they report liking and perceiving themselves as similar to members of other groups

36. Peer Relations
In middle childhood, the society of peers becomes an increasingly important context for development
Peer contact contributes to perspective taking and understanding of self and others
These developments, in turn, enhance peer interaction
Compared with preschoolers, school-age children resolve conflicts more effectively, using persuasion and compromise
Sharing, helping, and other prosocial acts increase
Aggression declines, especially physical attacks
But, verbal and relational aggression continue as children form peer groups

37. Peer Groups
By the end of middle childhood, children form peer groups – collectives that generate unique values and standards for behavior and social structure of leaders and followers
Peer groups organize on the basis of proximity (being in the same classroom) and similarity in sex, ethnicity, popularity, and aggression
The “peer culture” of a peer group typically consists of a specialized vocabulary, dress code, and place to “hang out”
Children who violate the codes of dress and behavior that grow out of peer groups are often “rebuffed” becoming targets of critical glances and comments
Within the peer group, children acquire many social skills, including cooperation and leadership
When children who are no longer “respected” are excluded from groups, they may turn to other low-status peers for group belonging
Thereby reducing their opportunities to learn social competent behavior
Desire for group membership can also be satisfied through formal groups, such as scouts and religious youth groups
Of course, adult involvement can hold negative behaviors in check in children’s formal and informal peer groups

38. Friendships
Whereas peer groups provide children with insight into larger social structures, friendships contribute to the development of trust and sensitivity
During the school years, friendships becomes more complex and psychologically based
Ex. A quote from an 8 year old: “Why is Shelly your best friend? Because she helps me when I’m sad, and she shares…What makes Shelly so special? I’ve known her longer, I sit next to her and got to know her better… How come you like Shelly better than anyone else? She’s done the most for me. She never disagrees, she never eats in front of me, she never walks away when I’m crying, and she helps me with my homework. .. How do you get someone to like you? If you’re nice to [your friends], they’ll be nice to you.”

39. Friendships
As these responses show, friendship has become a mutually agreed-on relationship in which children like each other’s personal qualities and respond to one another’s needs and desires
Once a friendship forms, trust becomes its defining feature
School age children state that a good friendship is based on acts of kindness that signify that each person can be counted on to support the other
Consequently, older children regard violations of trust, such as not helping when others need help, breaking promises, and gossiping behind the other’s back, as serious breaches of friendship
Because of these feathers, school-age children’s friendships are more selective
Whereas preschoolers say they have lots of friends, by age 8-9, children name only a few good friends
Girls, who demand greater closeness than boys, are more exclusive in their friendships

40. Friendships
Children tend to choose friends who are similar to themselves in age, sex, race, ethnicity, and SES, as well as in personality, popularity, academic achievement, and prosocial behavior
Yet, friendship opportunities offered by children’s environments also affect their choices
In integrated classrooms with mixed-race collaborative learning groups, students form more cross-race friendships
Over middle childhood, friendships remain fairly stable (about % enduring over a school year, and some for several years)
Through friendships, children come to realize that close friendships can survive disagreements if friends are secure in their liking for one another
Which helps them learn to tolerate criticism and resolve disputes

41. Friendships
The impact of friendships on children’s development depends on the nature of their friends
Children who bring kindness and compassion to their friendships strengthen each other’s prosocial tendencies and form more lasting ties
When aggressive children make friends, the relationship is often riddled with hostile interaction and is at risk for breakup, especially if only one member of the pair is aggressive
Aggressive girls’ friendships are high in exchange of private feelings but full of jealousy, conflict, and betrayal
Aggressive boys’ friendships involve frequent expressions of anger, coercive statements, physical attacks, and enticements to rule- breaking behavior

42. Peer Acceptance
Peer acceptance refers to likability – the extent to which a child is viewed by a group of agemates as a worthy social partner
Unlike friendship, likability is not a mutual relationship but is a one-sided perspective, involving the group’s view of an individual
Certain social skills that contribute to friendship enhance peer acceptance
Better accepted children tend to have more friends and more positive relationships with them
To measure peer acceptance, researchers usually use self-reports that measure social preferences or social prominence
Ex. Social preferences: asking children to identify classmates whom the “like very much” or “like very little”
Ex. Social prominence: children’s judgments of whom most of their classmates admire

43. Peer Acceptance
Children’s self-reports reveal 4 broad categories of social acceptance
Popular children: receive many positive votes (are well-liked)
Rejected children: get many negative votes (are disliked)
Controversial children: receive many votes, both positive and negative
Neglected children: are seldom chosen, either positively or negatively
About 2/3 of pupils in typical elementary school classrooms fit one of these categories
The remaining1/3 are average in peer acceptance and do not receive extreme scores

44. Peer Acceptance
Peer acceptance is a powerful predictor of psychological adjustment
Rejected children are anxious, unhappy, disruptive, and low in self-esteem
Both teachers and parents rate them as having a wide range of emotional and social problems
Peer rejection in middle childhood is strongly associated with poor school performance, absenteeism, dropping out, substance use, depression, antisocial behavior, and delinquency in adolescence and with criminality in early adulthood
Earlier influences, such as parenting practices and family stress, may largely explain the link between per acceptance and adjustment
School-age children with peer-relationship problems are more likely to have experienced family stress due to low income, insensitive child rearing, and coercive discipline
Also, rejected children evoke reactions from peers that contribute to their unfavorable development

45. Determinants of Peer Acceptance
Why is one child liked while another is rejected?
A wealth of research shows that social behavior plays a powerful role

46. Determinants of Peer Acceptance: Popular Children
Popular-prosocial children – usually combine academic and social competence
They perform well in school and communicating with peers in sensitive, friendly, and cooperative ways
Popular-antisocial children – may be “tough” boys who are athletically skilled but are poor students who cause trouble and defy adult authority, or relationally aggressive boys and girls who ignore, exclude, and spread rumors about other children as a way of enhancing their own status
Despite their aggressiveness, peers view these youths as “cool,” perhaps because of their athletic ability and sophisticated but devious social skills
Although peer admiration gives these children some protection against lasting adjustment difficulties, their antisocial acts require intervention
With age, peers like these high-status, aggressive peers less and less
This trend is stronger for relationally aggressive girls
The more socially prominent and controlling these girls become, the more they engage in relational aggression
Eventually peers condemn their nasty tactics and reject them

47. Determinants of Peer Acceptance: Rejected Children
Rejected-aggressive children – the largest subtype of rejected children, show high rates of conflict, physical and relational aggression, and hyperactive and impulsive behavior
Are also deficient in perspective taking and emotion regulation
Ex. They tend to misinterpret the innocent behaviors of peers as hostile and to blame others for their social difficulties
Compared with popular-aggressive children, they are more extremely antagonistic
Rejected-withdrawn children – are passive, socially awkward, and overwhelmed by social anxiety
They hold negative expectations for treatment by peers, and worry about being scorned and attacked
Rejected children are excluded as early as kindergarten
Soon their classroom participation declines, their feelings of loneliness rise, and their academic achievement falters, and they want to avoid school
Rejected children generally have few or not friends, which results in severe adjustment difficulties
Both types of rejected children are at risk for peer harassment
Rejected –aggressive children also act as bullies
Rejected-withdrawn children are especially likely to be victimized

48. Determinants of Peer Acceptance: Controversial & Neglected Children
Controversial children display both positive and negative social behaviors, engendering mixed peer opinion
They are hostile and disruptive, but they also engage in positive, prosocial acts
Though they have friends, they often bully others and engage in calculated relational aggression to maintain their dominance
Neglected children, once thought to be in need of treatment, are usually just as socially skilled as average children
They do not report feeling lonely or unhappy, and when they want to, they can break away from their usual pattern of playing by themselves
These children remind us that an outgoing, gregarious personality style is not the only path to emotional wellbeing

49. Helping Rejected Children
Most interventions to help rejected children involve coaching, modeling, and reinforcing positive social skills
Such as how to initiate interaction with a peer, cooperate in play, and respond to another child with friendly emotion and approval
The most effective programs combine social-skills training with other treatments
Rejected children are often poor students, whose low academic self-esteem magnifies negative reactions to teachers and classmates
Intensive academic tutoring improves both school achievement and social acceptance
Rejected children need help attributing their peer difficulties to internal, changeable causes
If socially incompetent behaviors originate in harsh, intrusive, authoritarian parenting, interventions that focus on the child-parent interaction may be needed
If parent-child interaction does not change, children may soon return to their old behavior patterns

50. Gender Typing
Children’s understanding of gender roles broadens in middle childhood
And, their gender identities (views of themselves as relatively masculine or feminine) change as well
Development differs for girls and boys, and it can vary considerably across cultures

51. Gender-Stereotyped Beliefs
Gender stereotyping of personality traits increases steadily in middle childhood, and is adultlike by age 11
Ex. Children regard “tough,” “aggressive,” “rational,” and “dominant” as masculine and “gentle,” “sympathetic,” and “dependent” as feminine
Children make these distinctions on the basis f observed sex differences in behavior and of differential adult treatment of boys and girls
When helping a child with a task, parents (especially fathers) behave in a more mastery-oriented fashion with sons, setting higher standards, explaining concepts, and pointing out important features of tasks (particularly during gender-typed tasks such as science activities)
Parents less often encourage girls to make their own decisions
Parents and teachers more often praise boys for knowledge and accomplishment and girls for obedience

52. Gender-Stereotyped Beliefs
School-age children consider certain academic subjects as feminine and others as masculine
They often regard reading, spelling, art, and music as more for girls and mathematics, athletics, and mechanical skills are more for boys
These attitudes influence children’s preferences for and sense of competence at certain subjects
Ex. Boys tend to feel more competent than girls at math and science, whereas girls feel more competent than boys as language arts (even when children of equal skill level are compared)
Although school-age children are aware of many stereotypes, they also develop a more open- minded view of what males and females can do
The ability to classify flexibly underlies this change
They realize that a person can belong to more than one social category (ex. One can be a “boy” yet “like to play house”)
By the end of middle childhood, children regard gender typing as socially rather than biologically influenced
But, acknowledging that people can cross gender lines does not mean they always approve of doing so
They take a harsh view of certain violations (ex. Boys playing with dolls and wearing girls’ clothing, girls acting noisily and roughly)
They are especially intolerant when boys engage in “cross-gender” acts, which children regard as nearly as bad as moral transgressions

53. Gender Identity and Behavior
From 3rd-6th grade, boys strengthen their identification with “masculine” personality traits
While girls’ identification with “feminine” traits declines
Compared with boys, who usually stick to “masculine” pursuits, girls begin to experiment with a wider range of options and more often consider traditionally male future work roles
These changes reflect a mixture of cognitive and social forces
School-age children are aware that society attaches greater prestige to “masculine” characteristics
Parents, especially fathers, are more tolerant of girls than boys crossing gender lines
A tomboyish girl can make her way into boys’ activities without losing the approval of her female peers, but a boy who hangs out with girls is likely to be ridiculed and rejected

54. Gender Identity and Behavior
As children make social comparisons and characterize themselves in terms of stable dispositions, gender identity expands to include self- evaluations, which greatly affect adjustment
Gender typicality – the degree to which the child feels similar to others of the same gender
Although children don’t need to by highly gender-typed to view themselves as gender-typical, their psychological well-being depends, to some degree, on feeling that they “fit in” with their same-sex peers
Gender contentedness – the degree to which the child feels satisfied with his or her gender assignment, which also promotes happiness
Felt pressure to conform to gender roles – the degree to which the child feels parents and peers disapprove of his or her gender-related traits
Because such pressure reduces the likelihood that children will explore options related to their interests and talents, children who feel strong gender-typed pressure are often distressed

55. Gender Identity and Behavior
How children feel about themselves in relations to their gender group becomes vitally important in middle childhood
Those who experience rejection because of their gender-atypical traits suffer profoundly
Currently, researchers and therapists are debating how best to help children who feel gender-atypical
Some experts advocate using therapy to make gender-atypical children more gender-typical
Through therapy and reinforces children for engaging in traditional gender-role activities so they will feel more compatible with same-sex peers
Others oppose this approach on grounds that it is likely to heighten felt pressure to conform (which predicts maladjustment)
And for children who fail to “change” this may result in parental rejection
These experts advocate intervening with parents and peers to help them become more accepting of children’s gender-atypical interests and behaviors

56. Family Influences
As children move into school, peer, and community contexts, the parent-child relationships change
At the same time, children’s well-being continues to depend on the quality of family interaction
Contemporary changes in families (high rates of divorce, remarriage, and maternal employment) can have positive and negative effects on children

57. Parent-Child Relationships
In middle childhood, the amount of time children spend with parents declines dramatically, and the child’s growing independence means that parents must deal with new issues
Ex. How many chores to assign, how much allowance to give, whether their friends are good influences, what to do about problems in school, keeping track of children when they’re out, or even when they’re home and the parent isn’t there to see what’s going on
Child rearing becomes easier for parents who established an authoritative style in the early years
Reasoning is more effective with school-age children because of their greater capacity for logical thinking and their increased respect for parents’ greater knowledge
Effective parents engage in Coregulation – a form of supervision in which parents exercise general oversight while permitting children to be in charge of moment-to-moment decision making
Grows out of cooperative relationship between parent and child and prepares the child for the greater freedom of adolescence
Parents must guide and monitor from a distance and effectively communicated expectations when they are with their children
Children must inform parents of their whereabouts, activities, and problems so parents can intervene when necessary

58. Parent-Child Relationships
Parents tend to devote more time to children of their own sex
In parents’ separate activities with children, mothers are more concerned with caregiving and ensuring that children meet responsibilities in homework, after-school activities, and chores
Fathers, especially those with sons, focus on achievement-related and recreational pursuits
But, when both parents are present, fathers engage in as much caregiving as mothers
Although school-age children often press for greater independence, they know how much they need their parents’ continuing support
In one study, 5th and 6th graders described parents as the most influential people in their lives
The often turned to mothers and fathers for affection, advice, enhancement of self-worth, and assistance with everyday problems

59. Siblings
Siblings are important sources of support for school-age children
However, sibling rivalry increases in middle childhood
As children participate in a wider range of activities, parents often compare siblings’ traits and accomplishments
The child who gets less parental affection, more disapproval, or fewer maternal resources is likely to be resentful
For same-sex siblings who are close in age, parental comparisons are more frequent, resulting in more quarreling and antagonism and poorer adjustment
This effect is particularly strong when parents are under stress; parents whose energies are drained are less careful about being fair
To reduce rivalry, siblings often strive to be different from one another, thereby shaping important aspects of each other’s development
Ex. 2 brothers may deliberately choose different athletic pursuits and musical instruments, and if the older one does especially well at an activity, the younger one may not want to try it
Parents can limit these effects by making an effort not to compare children, but some feedback about their competencies is inevitable
Although conflict rises, school-age siblings continue to rely on each other for companionship and assistance
But for siblings to reap these benefits, parental encouragement of warm, considerate sibling ties is vital

60. Only Children
Sibling relationships are not essential for healthy development
Contrary to popular belief, only children are not spoiled, and in some respects, they are advantaged
U.S. children growing up in one-child and multichild families do not differ in self-rated personality traits
And, compared to children with siblings, only children are higher in self- esteem and achievement motivation, do better in school, and attain higher levels of educations
One reason for this may be that only children have somewhat closer relationships with parents
Parents may exert more pressure for mastery and accomplishment
However, only children tend to be less well-accepted in peer groups
Perhaps because they have not had opportunities to practice conflict resolution skills with siblings

61. Only Children
Favorable development also characterizes only children in China, where a “one-child-only” policy has been strictly enforced in urban areas for more than 20 years, to control population growth
Compared with agemates who have siblings, Chinese only children are advanced in cognitive development and academic achievement
They also feel more emotionally secure, maybe because government disapproval promotes tension in families with more than one child
Chinese mothers usually ensure that their children have regular contact with 1st cousins (who are considered siblings)
Perhaps as a result, Chinese only children do not differ from agemates with siblings in social skills and peer acceptance
However, the next generation of Chinese only children will have no 1st cousins

62. Divorce
Currently, the divorce rate in the U.S. is the highest in the world, and of 45% of American marriages that end in divorce, half involve children
¼ of American children live in single-parent households, most with their mothers
But, single father households have increased steadily to about 12%
Children of divorce spend an average of 5 years in a single-parent home (almost 1/3 of their childhood)
About 2/3 of divorced parents marry again, and ½ of their children eventually experience the end of their parents’ 2nd marriage
Divorce is not a single event in the lives of parents and children
It is a transition that leads to a variety of new living arrangements, accompanied by changes in housing, income, and family roles and responsibilities
Although many studies have reported that marital breakup is stressful for children, great individual differences exist in how well children fare
Impact on children involves many factors including: the custodial parent’s psychological health, the child’s characteristics, and social supports within the family and surrounding community

63. Divorce: Immediate Consequences
In newly divorced households, family conflict often rises
Mother-headed households typically experience a sharp drop in income
The majority of single mothers with young children live in poverty, getting less than the full amount of child support from the absent father or none at all
They often move to lower-cost housing, reducing supportive ties to neighbors and friends
The transition from marriage to divorce typically leads to high maternal stress, depression, and anxiety and to a disorganized family situation
Ex. Meals and bedtimes may occur at all hours, the house may not get cleaned, and children may no longer go on weekend outings
As children react with distress and anger to their less secure home lives, discipline may become harsh and inconsistent
Contact with noncustodial fathers often decreases over time
Fathers who see their children only occasionally may be permissive, making the mother’s task even harder
The more parents argue and fail to provide children with warmth, involvement, and consistent guidance, the poorer children’s adjustment
About 20-25% of children in divorced families display severe problems, compared with about 10% in nondivorced families
At the same time, reactions vary with children’s age, temperament, and sex

64. Divorce: Children’s Age
Younger children often blame themselves for a marital breakup and fear abandonment by both parents
Older children can understand that they are not responsible for their parents’ divorce
But they may still react strongly, declining in school performance, becoming unruly, and escaping into undesirable peer activities, especially when family conflict is high and supervision is low
The oldest children in a family may display more mature behavior, such as willingly taking on extra family and household tasks as well as emotional support of a depressed, anxious mother
But, they may become resentful when the demands are too great

65. Divorce: Children’s Temperament and Sex
When temperamentally difficult children are exposed to stressful life events and inadequate parenting, their problems are magnified
Easy children are less often then targets of parental anger and also cope more effectively with adversity
Girls sometimes respond to divorce with internalizing reactions such as crying and withdrawal
More often, children of both sexes show demanding and attention-getting behavior
In mother-custody families, boys experience more serious adjustment problems
Boys are more active and noncompliant in general, and these behaviors increase with exposure to parental conflict and inconsistent discipline
Coercive maternal behavior and defiance on the part of sons are common in divorcing households
Maybe because of their unruly behavior, boys receive less emotional support from mothers, teachers, and peers
Their coercive interactions with their mothers soon spread to their siblings relationships
In general, children who are challenging to rear get worse after divorce

66. Divorce: Long-Term Consequences
Most children show improved adjustment by 2 years after divorce
But, overall, continue to show slightly lower academic achievement, self-esteem, and social competence and emotional adjustment
Children with difficult temperaments are especially likely to drop out of school, be depressed, and display antisocial behavior
Divorce is linked to problems with adolescent sexuality and development of intimate ties
Young people who experienced divorce (especially more than once) display higher rates of early sexuality and adolescent parenthood
Some experience other lasting difficulties, such as reduced educational attainment, troubled romantic relationships and marriages, divorce in adulthood, and unsatisfying parent-child relationships
The overriding factor in positive adjustment following divorce is effective parenting
Shielding the child from family conflict and using authoritative child rearing

67. Divorce: Long-Term Consequences
Contact with fathers is important in mother-custody situations
The more paternal contact and the warmer the father-child relationship, the less children react with defiance and aggression
For girls, a good father-child relationships protects against early sexual activity and unhappy romantic involvements
For boys, it seems to affect overall psychological well-being
In fact, several studies indicate that outcomes for sons are better when the father is the custodial parent
Fathers’ greater economic security and image of authority seem to help them engage in effective parenting with sons
And boys in father-custody families may benefit from greater involvement of both parents because noncustodial mothers participate more than noncustodial fathers
Although, divorce is painful for children, remaining in an intact but high-conflict family is worse for children than making the transition to a low-conflict, single- parent household
Divorcing parents who set aside their disagreements and support each other in their child-rearing roles greatly improve their children’s chances of growing up competent, stable, and happy
Caring extended-family members, teachers, siblings, and friends also reduce the likelihood that divorce will result in long-term difficulties

68. Divorce Mediation, Joint Custody, and Child Support
Awareness that divorce is highly stressful for children and families has led to community-based services aimed at helping them through this difficult time
Divorce mediation – a series of meetings between divorcing adults and a trained professional aimed at reducing family conflict, including battles over property division and child custody
An increasingly common custody option is joint custody – which grants both parents equal say in important decisions about the child’s upbringing
In most cases, children reside with one parent and see the other on a fixed schedule
In other cases, parents share physical custody, and children move between homes and sometimes schools and peer groups
Regardless of living arrangements, children in joint custody situations tend to be better adjusted than children in sole-maternal-custody homes
Many single-parent families depend on child support from the noncustodial parent to relieve financial strain
All states have procedures for withholding wages from parents who fail to make child-support payments
Although child support is usually not enough to life a single-parent family out of poverty, it can ease its burdens substantially
Noncustodial fathers who have generous visitation schedules and who often see their children are more likely to pay child support regularly

69. Blended Families
A blended, or reconstituted family, is a family structure resulting from remarriage of a divorced parent that includes parent, child, and new steprelatives
For some children, this expanded family network is positive, bringing more adult attention
But most children have more problems than children in stable, first-marriage families
Switching to stepparents’ new rules and expectations can be stressful, and children often view steprelatives as intruders
How well children adapts is, again, related to the quality of family functioning
Depends on which parent forms a new relationship, the child’s age and sex, and the complexity of blended-family relationships
Older children and girls seem to have the hardest time

70. Mother-Stepfather Families
This arrangement is the most common because mothers generally retain custody of children
Boys usually adjust quickly if the stepfather is warm, refrains from exerting his authority too quickly, and offers relief from coercive cycles of mother-son interaction
Stepfathers who marry, rather than just cohabitating, are more involved in parenting
Maybe because men who choose to marry a mother with children are more interested and skilled at child rearing
Girls often react with sulky, resistant behavior
Stepfathers may disrupt the close ties many girls have established with their mothers
Older school-age children and adolescents of both sexes find it harder to adjust to blended families
They often display more irresponsible, acting-out behavior than their peers not in blended families
Some stepparents are more involved with their biological children than their stepchildren and older school-age children and adolescents are more likely to notice and challenge unfair treatment
Adolescents often view the new stepparent as a threat to their freedom, especially if they experienced little parental monitoring in the single-parent family

71. Father-Stepmother Families
When fathers have custody, children typically react negatively to remarriage
One reason is that children living with fathers often start out with more problems
Perhaps the biological mother could no longer handle the difficult child (usually a boy) so the father and his new partner are faced with a youngster who has behavior problems
In other instances, the father has custody because of a very close relationship with the child, and his remarriage disrupts this bond
Girls especially have a hard time getting along with their stepmothers
Either because the remarriage threatens the girl’s bond with her father or because she becomes entangled in loyalty conflicts between her two mother figures
But, the longer girls live in father-stepmother households, the more positive their interaction with stepmothers becomes
With time and patience most girls benefit from the support of a second mother figure

72. Support for Blended Families
Family life education and therapy can help parents and children adapt to the complexities of living in a blended family
Effective approaches encourage stepparents to move into their new roles gradually by first building a warm relationship with the child
Counselors can help couples form a cooperative “parenting coalition” to limit loyalty conflicts and provide consistency in child rearing
This allows children to benefit from the increased diversity that stepparent relationships bring to their lives
The divorce rate for second marriages is even higher than for first marriages
Parents with antisocial tendencies and poor child-rearing skills are particularly likely to have several divorces and remarriages
The more marital transitions children experience, the greater their difficulties
These families usually require prolonged, intensive therapy

73. Maternal Employment and Child Development
Children of mothers who enjoy their work and remain committed to parenting show favorable adjustment including higher self-esteem, more positive family and peer relations, less gender-stereotyped beliefs, and better grades in school
Girls, especially, profit from the image of female competence
Regardless of SES, daughters of employed mothers perceive women’s roles as involving more freedom of choice and satisfaction and are more achievement and career-oriented
Employed mothers who value their parenting role are more likely to use authoritative child rearing and coregulation
Fathers in dual-earner households often take on greater child-rearing responsibilities
Paternal involvement is associated with higher achievement and more mature social behavior
When the mother’s employment is overly stressful, children are at risk for ineffective parenting: reduced parental sensitivity, fewer joint parent-child activities, and poorer cognitive development in children throughout childhood and adolescence
Especially when low-SES mothers spend long hours at low-paying, physically exhausting jobs
Part-time employment and flexible work schedules are associated with good child adjustment

74. Support for Employed Parents and Their Families
In dual-earner families, the husband’s willingness to share household responsibilities is crucial
If he helps little or not at all, the mother carries a double load, at home and at work, leading to fatigue, distress, and little time and energy for children
Assistance from work settings and communities is needed in dual- earner families
Such as part-time employment, flexible schedules, and job sharing, and paid leave when children are sick helps parents juggle the demands of work and child rearing
Equal pay and employment opportunities for women are also important
Because these policies enhance financial status and morale, they improve the way mothers feel and behave when they arrive home at the end of the working day

75. Child Care for School-Age Children
High-quality child care is vital for parents’ peace of mind and children’s well-being, even in middle childhood
Self-care children are the estimated 7 million 5-13 year olds in the U.S. who are without adult supervision for some period of time after school
Some studies report that self-care children suffer from adjustment problems, whereas others show no such effects
Children’s maturity and the way they spend their time seem to explain these contradictions
Among younger school-age children, those who spend more hours alone have more emotional and social difficulties
Older self-care children who have a history of authoritative child rearing, are monitored by telephone calls, and have regular after-school chores appear responsible and well adjusted
In contrast, children left to their own devices are more likely to bend to peer pressures
Before age 8-9, most children need supervision because they are not yet competent to handle emergencies
Attending after-school programs with well-trained staffs, generous adult-child ratios, and skill-building activities is linked to better adjustment
Low-SES children who participate in “after-care” enrichment activities show special benefits
Ex. Scouting, music and art lessons, clubs, sports, etc.