2. 19601960 19601960 19601960 19601960 19601960 19601960 19601960 19601960 19601960 19601960

3. Garry Mills sang Top Teen Baby Who’s a happy boy then?

4. Nina & Frederick warbled ‘Little Donkey’ Little did they know…

5. Elvis Presley said It’s Now or Never Bet Mum said the same thing!

6. Beer goes UP to 1/7d!!!!! Have to switch to shorts!

7. Stirling Moss wins Monaco Grand Prix despite losing his licence Who needs a licence, anyway?

8. Then on 16th December - the highlight of the year

9. Desmond Keiher was dropped from a great height - and has never been the same since

10. That makes our Des the big ……

11. Oh No! It’s the “F” word, that terrible “F” word, stop me, please before I say it, before I lose control and say it again, and again and again. Oh No! Too Late!

12. Des is Fifty Yes Fifty

13. Don’t feel old and depressed because you’re 50! Things could be worse - you could be pregnant

14. Cheer up - here’s the perfect present for a man of your age - hot chicks with a fast car

15. And to end this show - a traditional Hawaiian wish - don’t get excited this isn’t a hint about your present

16. May your coconuts never hang lower than your grass skirt

17. Now, where’s the cake????