1. A play on words

2. Find the puns in the story

3. Find the puns: EDUCATION There was once a cross-eyed teacher who couldn’t control his pupils. (pupils) When the electricity went off during a storm at a school, the students were delighted! (de-lighted) It wasn’t school John disliked, it was just the principal of it. (principal) He wears glasses during math because it improves division. (division) To write with a broken pencil is pointless. (pointless) Studying fungus is a way to mold young minds. (mold)

4. Find the pun: EDUCATION Skipping school to bungee jump will get you suspended. (suspended) Math teachers have lots of problems! (problems) Math teachers call retirement the “aftermath.” (aftermath) Teachers who take class attendance are absent- minded. (absent minded)

5. Find the pun in each statement HUMOR FOR LEXOPHILES (LOVERS OF WORDS) I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me. Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a rest. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now. The boxer’s girlfriend was a knockout. The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

6. Find the pun in each statement A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground. The dead batteries were given out free of charge. Acupuncture: A jab well done!

7. Find the pun in each statement A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired. A will is a dead giveaway. A backward poet writes inverse. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion. A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France, resulted in linoleum blown apart.

8. Find the pun He broke into song because he couldn't find the key. A calendar's days are numbered. A boiled egg is hard to beat. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine. When she saw her first strands of grey hair, she thought she'd dye. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.

9. Find the pun Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie. The frustrated cannibal threw up his hands. The butcher backed up into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work. Did you hear about the vampire who used to torture his victims with music? His Back was worse than his bite. He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.

10. Knock-Knock jokes are puns too!!! Knock knock! Keith Keith me, thweet heart! Knock knock! General Lee Generally I do not tell jokes! Knock knock! Dwayne Dwayne the bathtub, I'm dwowning!

11. Assignment Bring in at least 2 puns tomorrow, written or typed or printed from the computer. You can go to google and type in “puns.” You will find thousands. Check out the website www.apunaday.comwww.apunaday.com You can think of jokes you know and write them down You can use knock-knock jokes. ***Make sure your puns are appropriate for school!!!