1. LaSHON HaTOV Using words intentionally to help students create
their futures
Deborah Gilboa, MD

2. hap·pi· ness: noun good fortune; pleasure; contentment; joy
INGREDIENTS:
Confidence
Competence
Relationships
hap·pi· ness: noun

3. “Happiness Now” Trap Unattainable Conflicts with resilience
Removes opportunity for resilience “practice”
Causes us to change the narrative to support everything being ok
Limits the resources we offer
We’re terrible at predicting it for others

4. 5 obstacles to Raising kids of great character
Happiness now
Comfortable is necessary for safe
Placing achievement over character
Villifying Stress
Solving problems for our children they can learn to solve for themselves.

5. Comfort is not necessary for safety
Security
Healing
Identity
Discomfort
Learning
Change
GROWTH
Comfort is not necessary for safety

6. Achievement Trap
When achievement is the top priority, character easily suffers
Justifies cheating, lying, substance use
Judged externally – others say when you’ve succeeded
No matter how great, can’t control if someone else is better
Pressure is tremendous

7. Good & Bad Stress Stress is to resilience as exercise is to muscle
New Stimuli or unknown patterns cause stress
Change leads to stress
Unpredictable supports worsen
Good & Bad Stress

8. Stress Strain or tension Necessary for growth Physical Emotional
Psychologic

9. Problem Solving Trap We are expert problem solvers
Our kids rely on us for that
THEY need the chance to become good problem solvers
Problem solving doesn’t look like problem solving the first dozen (+) times you do it!

11. YOU are the Solution! 1. Engagement: Praise, Interest, Concern
2. Guidance:
Instruction, Correction
3. Stepping back
YOU are the Solution!

12. Dr. G can help you create change!
Pick a time to talk to her about it! (click this!)