1. Lesson 17
Proverbs

2. Children Obey Your Parents
The command for “children to obey their parents” is directed at the children but it necessitates that parents teach and train their children. Therefore, it is a shared responsibility.
It initially occurs between two parties with completely different experiences and knowledge levels. The things that have shaped a parents view of the world have not yet been experienced by their child. This requires patience and understanding from both parties.

3. Children Obey Your Parents
The relationship changes as children gain independence and their own families. Often a greater level of mutual respect develops; however, it requires that the grandparents take a different stance regarding their children due to God’s commandment to the new family to leave and cleave. Gen: 2:24
Ultimately, it becomes one where the roles can shift as parents stubbornly relinquish independence and their children try to respectfully work as caregivers.

4. Children Obey Your Parents
The riddle of the Sphinx paints a picture of this transition.
"Which creature has one voice and yet becomes four-footed and two-footed and three-footed?“
Oedipus is credited in Greek lore with solving the riddle. "Man—who crawls on all fours as a baby, then walks on two feet as an adult, and then uses a walking stick in old age“
The effective communication and discipline approaches logically change since we change over time.
The standard by which we are judged does not.

5. How? Listen to your parents Instruct, Listen, Respect, Discipline
Pr. 1:8-9 – “My child, listen when your father corrects you. Don’t neglect your mother’s instruction. What you learn from them will crown you with grace and be a chain of honor around your neck.” NLT
Pr. 4:1-4 – “Hear, O sons, a father’s instruction, and be attentive, that you may gain insight, for I give you good precepts; do not forsake my teaching. When I was a son with my father, tender, the only one in the sight of my mother, he taught me and said to me, “Let your heart hold fast my words; keep my commandments, and live.”

6. How? Listen to your parents
Pr. 23:19-32 – “Hear, my son, and be wise, and direct your heart in the way. Be not among drunkards or among gluttonous eaters of meat, for the drunkard and the glutton will come to poverty, and slumber will clothe them with rags. Listen to your father who gave you life, and do not despise your mother when she is old.”
Parents must develop, demand, and enforce respect.
Prior to teen years is important
Pr. 29:15 – “ The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself brings his mother to shame.”

7. How? Listen to your parents
Teaching a child to listen is as important as all the other instruction provided.
Mark Twain said, “At age 14 I was appalled at my father’s ignorance, but at 21 I was amazed at how much the old man had learned in just 7 years.”
Pr. 15:5 – “A fool despises his father’s instruction: but he that regards reproof is prudent.

8. How?
Obey your parents
Pr. 6:20-22 – “My son, keep your father’s commandment, and forsake not your mother’s teaching. Bind them on your heart always; tie them around your neck. When you walk, they will lead you; when you lie down, they will watch over you; and when you awake, they will talk with you.”
Col. 3:20 – “Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.” Note: It does not say when you feel like it or get around to it.
Pr. 19:26-27 – “Children who mistreat their father or chase away their mother are an embarrassment and a public disgrace. If you stop listening to instruction, my child, you will turn your back on knowledge.”

9. How?
Obey your parents
Rm. 1:30-32 – “And since they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them up to a debased mind to do what ought not to be done. They were filled with all manner of unrighteousness, evil, covetousness, malice. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, maliciousness. They are gossips, slanderers, haters of God, insolent, haughty, boastful, inventors of evil, disobedient to parents, foolish, faithless, heartless, ruthless. Though they know God’s righteous decree that those who practice such things deserve to die, they not only do them but give approval to those who practice them.”

10. How? Obey your parents There is only one exception.
Acts 5:29 – “We ought to obey God rather than men”
Col. 3:5-9 – If obedience to a parent requires sin, we are not bound.
This requires courage on the part of a child. It also necessitates respectful disobedience.

11. How? Bring joy and gladness to your parents
Pr. 10: 1 – “A wise son makes a glad father, but a foolish son is a sorrow to his mother.”
Pr. 15:20 – “A wise son makes a glad father, but a foolish man despises his mother.”
Pr. 17:6 – “Grandchildren are the crown of the aged, and the glory of children is their fathers.”
Pr. 17:21 – “He who sires a fool gets himself sorrow, and the father of a fool has no joy.”
Pr. 17:25 – “A foolish son is a grief to his father and bitterness to her who bore him.”
Pr. 19:13 – “A foolish son is ruin to his father, …”

12. How? Be a wise son and walk not with sinners
Pr. 1:10, 15 – “My son, if sinners entice thee, consent thou not. … walk not in the way with them; refrain thy foot from their path.”
Pr. 3:1, 21 – Do not forget God’s law, but follow His sound wisdom.
Pr. 4:10, – God’s words are life to all who follow
Pr. 7:1-4 – Make God’s law the “apple of your eye.”
Pr. 24:12-14, 21 – “Lear to obey parental, civil, and spiritual law and you will be blessed.

13. How? Accept chastening and rebuke as an act of love
Pr. 3:11-12 – Chastening from God or parents comes from true love.
Pr. 17:10 – Be wise and obey the reproof
Pr. 29:17 – “Correct thy son, and he shall give the rest; yea, he shall give delight unto thy soul.”

14. This was the first commandment with promise
That it may be well with thee.
Eph. 6:4 – “…bring up children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”
Pr. 3:13-18 – Wisdom imparted is like a tree of life making the child’s future one of success.
Communication skills
Social skills
Common sense
Honor Father and Mother
Treat as a thing of value
Mark 7:9-13 – Honoring involves caring for aged parents

15. This was the first commandment with promise
With a child maturing should come appreciation for their parents
Thanksgiving and appreciation can be slow to come.
What did it take for the prodigal son?
What did it take for Esau regarding his wives?
The elimination of selfishness is part of the growth.
Pr. 31:28 – “Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:”

16. Conclusion Parents have a responsibility to train their children.
Children have an obligation to listen and obey.
Both parties are to do so with respect and love.