Presentation on theme: "Responsible Relationships"— Presentation transcript:
1 Responsible Relationships THINKING ABOUT DATING: Kayla has a close group of friends. Dan, one of her good friends, told her that he wants to date her exclusively. Kayla knows that Dan’s been sexually active in the past. She likes Dan but does not think she’s ready for a serious relationship.Girls -Write a dialogue in which Kayla expresses her feelings to DanBoys –Write a dialogue handling the rejectionBe honest and respectfulDiscuss opinions if the roles are reversed – Kayla wants to only date Dan. Dan is not sure he wants to be tied down to one person.
2 Why date? List some ideas- ReasonsGet to know each otherDevelop friendshipsCompanionship & supportExplore characteristics they would like in a future partner/spouseSome have to wait until they reach an age set by parentsShy people may delay datingSome prefer to develop many friendships insteadSex
3 Benefits of Dating Exposes you to different types of people Helps you determine whom you relate to easilyHelps you in communication and solving disagreementsCan enrich your life by finding emotional support during tough periods in your lifeNot uncommon for girls to ask boys out – teens face enormous pressures with the freedoms they have – unlike years ago.Some teens decide not to date:Priorities – the goals, tasks, values, and activities that you judge to be more important than others.Can include focusing on family, school, athletics, or individual goalsTalking to your parents can be helpful deciding if you are ready t o dateNever feel pressured to do anything that goes against your values or your family values
4 Writing assignment – Who should initiate the dating process Writing assignment – Who should initiate the dating process? What is your idea of a first date? What activities would be included?SETTING LIMITSParents may set for your safety & healthCurfew - Where you can go – Age of person you date - Nights you can go out - What you can wear??Key Terms _Intimacy –Closeness between two people that develops over timeInfatuation –Exaggerated feelings of passionQuestion – Why is it important for you to set dating limits?Is it more important for males or females to set limits?
5 Positive dating relationships – based on mutual respect & caring - Identify some ways that teens can demonstrate respect for their dates.SETTING LIMITSABSTINENCE- Define & describe- Can you practice abstinence & still be intimate & expressaffection?- Self-Control – person’s ability to use responsibility to over-ride emotions.- Sexual feelings – normal but need to control- Discuss positives/negatives of abstinence- What are some pressures teens may face- How do you control those pressures?
6 TIPS TO PRACTICE SELF-CONTROL & ABSTINENCE Set limits for expressing affectionCommunicate w/ your partnerTalk to a trusted adultSeek low-pressure dating situationsDate someone who respects & shares your valuesDon’t put yourself in tough situations? Alcohol/drugsQUESTION: What characteristics do you look for in someone?- What is more important to you- physical or emotional traits?
7 REFUSAL SKILLS VERBAL: Clearly identify problem/issue State your thoughts & feelings about issueState what you would like to have happen insteadExplain the results if the change in plans is madeExplain the results if the change in plans is not madeBe firm in your voice and clear in what you sayNON-VERBAL:Your body language should match what you are saying.Stand tall, do not laugh, giggle, avoid nervous habits (fidgeting)
8 REFUSAL SKILLS – How do I say “NO” 9 ways to say “NO” and do things your way:Blame someone else (Parent)Give a reasonIgnore the request or pressureLeave the situation****Say “no thanks”****Say no and mean it****Keep saying noMake an excuseSuggest something else to doA person with self-confidence will use because they are not a follower and afraid to say “no” when they know something is wrong or not for them. Are you one of these people??
9 Dating and family relationships- Cultural Differences AFGHANISTANTaliban requires women to be completely covered by a veil & accompanied by a male relative when leaving the house. This is more common in the rural/tribal areas than the major cities. Does not apply to young girlsWomen do not participate publicly in major- decision making process – few rights under Taliban – obey orders of father, brothers, husbandShiites stress more rights for women both politically & economically – may freely choose husbandDATING – unions are negotiated by families. Marriage is an obligation – Polygamy does exist but all wives have to be treated equally – not common in this day & age.Marriage between cousins is high except when trying to diversify the families social assets2 families negotiate financial aspects of union – decide on trousseau (bride price & dowry)Engagement – female relatives of groom bring gifts to home of bride –Wedding = 3 day party – paid by groom’s family – marriage contract signed, couple brought together
10 AFGHANISTAN (cont)Family –Basic Household= man-wife-his son’s & their spouses/children – unmarried daughtersChildren/Teens – Respect/Obedience are important but so is initiative & self-confidenceMales – important right of passage – circumcision – age 7 – duties include learning how to care for guests and hospitalityFemales – begin helping mom as soon as they can standBoth taught values of honor & shame and when to be modestLiteracy is low – 5-10 % get formal education – reform is trying to increase this %Behavior – Young people address adults by title, public displays of contact between M & F are avoided. Men shake hands and put their rt. hand on heart. Direct eye contact by women is avoided, mostly in rural areas
11 CANADAM & F have perceived equal standing & status in Canadian societyWomen likely to live below poverty line, head single-parent household, and work in service sectorPolitics is limited for females, still male dominatedSociety is open with freedom of choiceVarious cultures practice their beliefsMarriage – Most choose freely without obligationRestricted by law to M & W – officiated same as in U.S.Have Common-law marriageInformal declaration by partnersRecently extended to include same sex partnersMarriage celebrated similar to U.S.FAMILY – nuclear familyNewly weds start own family independent of theirsChildren/Teens – values/education similar to U.S.Dating – free to choose
12 CHINA Western influence has changed view of women in China over time Presently, women have legal equality to men but still face social issues including spousal abuse and the selling of young women/girls as bridesDating – Some freedoms for teens, match making and arrangements by family still take placeMarriage – Pragmatic approach - $$$-Standing- romanceGroom’s family pays for wedding –Western style weddings popular but expensiveWomen can get a divorce, but very difficultFamily Life – Common for several generations to live under 0ne roof – in part due to old traditions & limited housingWoman will leave her house and become part of her husbands family – mother in law can treat harshlyOldest son will stay home and care for aging parentsChildren – very young age – they have responsibilities – education has become important I Chinese societyKids are taught respect for elders and to duty
13 UNITED STATES OF AMERICA Women have the same legal rights as men, access to B. Control & abortion, BUT, still paid less for equal jobs, under represented in politics & may suffer from lower self-esteemDating – many different traditions due to diverse population. Typically, male and female decide – some cultural influences may take place. Parents may be involved in the process – factors????What is a typical first date in high school??Engagement – again cultural influences may play a role- man usually asks permission of father of the female – length is usually determined by couple, time of year, finances, job security, age, etc.Marriage – is formally a civil institution but is commonly held in a church. Marriage customs will depend on the background of the couple and their families.Western (American) style marriages are big, lavish, expensive!!!Many types of unions take place in America, all have to be documented with marriage license
14 Adoption is common but reproductive technology is highly valued. USA (cont)Family – nuclear family group is common, there has been an increase in single parent families and gay couple parents.Adoption is common but reproductive technology is highly valued.Why??Education – required for all kids – but home schooling has become more common in recent yearsCollege – personally choice based on career, money, desire, need.Behavior – Globally Americans are viewed as loud, crass, effusiveYoung kids are taught manners and to obey parents, but this can be cultural as well. American kids/teens can have a sense of entitlement and value independence.