1. School of Health, Wellbeing and Social Care The Open University (UK)
Young men, social disadvantage and the development of caring masculinities
Dr Martin Robb
School of Health, Wellbeing and Social Care
The Open University (UK)
Paper presented at ‘Care Ethics and Precarity’, first CERC Annual Conference, Portland, Oregon, USA. 27th September 2018

2. Beyond male role models: gender identities and practices in work with young men (2013 -2015)
exploring role of gender in work with boys and young men using social care services
interviews with young male service users – and support workers – in Scotland, Wales and England

3. Young men, masculinity and wellbeing (2016- 2017)
part of three-country study in UK, USA and Mexico
exploring links between expectations around ‘being a man’ and young men’s mental and emotional wellbeing
focus groups with young men aged in London and Yorkshire, England

4. The young men in the studies
Beyond male role models:
50 young men aged 18-25
Users of care/support services in Scotland, England, Wales
Young offenders, young people ‘at risk’, with behavioural/learning needs, care leavers
60% white, 40% black and minority ethnic backgrounds
Young men, masculinity and wellbeing:
25 young men aged 18-30
4 x focus groups (2 x London, 2 x Yorkshire)
70% black and minority ethnic (black and south Asian), 30% white backgrounds

5. Key questions
How do socially marginalised young men describe their experience of family relationships, and particularly their experiences of being fathered and mothered?
How does their experience of family relationships influence young men’s capacity to care?
What are the implications for our understanding of the development of gender identities, and specifically of caring masculinities?

6. A care ethics framework
Being a person has little to do with rationality and everything to do with relationships – to our world and to those in it […] We do not become a person without the engagement of other persons – their care, as well as their recognition of the uniqueness and the connectedness of our human agency, and the distinctiveness of our particularly human relations to others and of the world we fashion. Eva Feder Kittay (2002) The principle of care – that in order to grow, flourish, and survive or endure illness, disability and frailty, each individual requires a caring relationship with significant others who hold that individual’s well-being as a primary responsibility and a primary good. Eva Feder Kittay (1999) Men, in their roles as fathers…have for too long been socialized to focus upon issues of duty and justice and not enough on care. Maurice Hamington (2002)

7. Marginalised young men and their fathers
Young men from marginalised backgrounds have often experienced difficult and disrupted family relationships.
Despite this, ‘family’ remains an important factor and influence in young men’s lives – and how they see their futures.
Marginalised young men have often had difficult – or non-existent – relationships with their fathers.
Young men’s attitudes to their fathers are marked by a deep ambivalence, balancing admiration with criticism, and disappointment with a sense of sadness and loss.

8. ‘I’ve learned not to expect too much’: Young men talking about their fathers
I’ve learned growing up to not expect too much. Not to expect the ideal father-son relationship .
Young man, London
I looked up to my father, my father was very criminally active…that was who I kind of looked up to at first, because that was my role model. Your father’s your superhero. His influence was actually bad, and I grew up thinking, that’s the right thing to do.
Caile, Scotland
I’ve had trust issues stemming from my father.
Dwayne, London
I haven’t chatted to him in, what is it, ten and a half years… I will always love him, because he is my dad, but I don’t have any physical, or any face-to-face contact with him, because you know, I don’t respect him and don’t like him and just love him based on the fact that he is my dad.
Harry, Cornwall

9. Relationships with mothers
Marginalised young men have often had close and positive relationships with their mothers, and with other female relatives and caregivers.
Mothers and women generally have often provided the only models of consistent care in young men’s lives.
Young men often cite their mothers as the most important influences on their identities as actual or aspiring fathers – and on their capacity to care.

10. ‘Me mam’s brand new’: Young men talking about their mothers
I’ve stayed with my mam all my life, me mam’s brand new…she’s like sound, you know. Frankie, Scotland [My mum] could be a good role model, she’s always honest, never gets into trouble. Young man, London I have always got on with females more, and that’s only because I grew up with a lot of females in my life. Lewis, Cornwall I suppose with being brought up by two women I’ve not been sort of taught how to go and mend a car or how to lay bricks or anything like that, so it wouldn’t have occurred to me to go and do a job like that anyway, whereas I’ve always been taught how to care for people, so it was just the natural thing to go into really. Kevin, Warwickshire (nursery nurse) I think that my mum, certainly in the sense of emotional connection for, or practical needs being met, I would certainly perceive those as coming mostly from my mum. And, you know, the fact that I might have to get my young daughter up and wash her and give her a meal and make that some kind of experience that’s nurturing, I wouldn’t really be able to recollect a memory from having had that from my father. So I would be using memories or experiences from my mother to remember, you know, how that was accomplished and what that felt like and what might be nice about it and so on. Sean (involved father)

11. Young men, fatherhood and the transition to caring masculinity
Most young men aspire to be good fathers and take the responsibility of fatherhood seriously.
In contrast to dominant discourses surrounding young fatherhood, the young fathers in these studies were either positively involved, or wanted to be involved, in the care and upbringing of their children.
Becoming a father can be a catalyst for exchanging ‘care-less’ young masculinity for a ‘care-full’ adult masculine identity.

12. ‘As long as I’m nothing like my dad, I’m happy’: Young men talking about fatherhood
Then I started having my own child, and I’m sitting in the jail, and I’m thinking, I’m doing exactly what my dad done to me. This isn’t right, I need to get out of this situation and stop. Caile, West of Scotland I just want to have kids when I settle down really. Get a decent house, decent car and that. Young man, London You’re not really chasing the money anymore…You’re chasing the happiness of your family, and your child’s upbringing. Being a young father is just like a lot of responsibility, and something that you push yourself to hit the mark with. As long as I'm nothing like my dad I'm happy.

13. Precarious identities: difficult transitions to caring masculinities
The transition to caring adult masculinity can be a difficult process of negotiating between different forms of masculine identity.
There is a need for vulnerable young men to be ‘held’ through this transition by consistent relationships of care.
Young men value respect, consistency and trust – and above all, genuine care – in support workers, more than gender or other social identities.

14. ‘What kind of dad’s he gonna be?’
A: Obviously I got bairns and that, so I’ve had to grow up … For me now my life’s about getting a job, family… I’m trying to be a respectful person, I don’t wanna walk down the street, and seeing all that stuff, because when I am walking down the street with my wee boy, if I’ve been doing that at the weekend, rolling about with people, then I am walking down the street and I might bump into these people you know. B: And they might not even care you got your bairns with you. A: Exactly! … I can be walking down the street on a Friday night, and singing songs and I’ll get ‘Who you looking at, yer dafty’, you know what I mean, and …other mums and dads may be walking down the street who are out for a wee quiet drink at the weekend and then they see me walking down the street with my wee boy, what they gonna think? They’re gonna think, that’s the boy I seen yesterday kicking stuff about and smashing things, fighting with people, and he’s walking down the street with a bairn, what kind of dad’s he gonna be? Young men, Scotland

15. ‘It’s about the love aspect…it’s about relationship.’
They are just good people man, generally good people man, good people, they don’t treat you like scum like some other people do.
(Eddie, Scotland)
You just know you can trust them.
(Burt, Scotland)
A bad worker? Someone who don’t care about you.
(James,Dorset)
You just be yourself and through that they will see that you do actually care.
(Kellen, London)
This might sound like a cliché, but you need to care, you actually need to care, these boys are, whatever has gone on in their life, one of the phrases I like is, be kind, everyone you meet is fighting a great battle, so you should just be nice to people.
(Willie, support worker, Scotland)
Some people, you can have a degree in youth work, you can have a Masters in youth work, but it doesn’t mean that you’re a youth worker that children are going to actually gel with you, do you see. Because it’s more about care. It’s about the love
aspect, you know, it’s about relationship, about respecting them as individuals.
(Joan, support worker, London)

16. What are the implications of these research findings?
Media and policy discussion of the ‘problem’ of boys tends to focus on absent fathers and a lack of positive male role models.
‘Male role model’ discourse overlooks or stigmatises the important role played by mothers and other women in boys’ development – especially their capacity to care.
This discourse is also underpinned by a simplistic and reductive social learning model of gender/identity development.
There is a need for a more nuanced model of gender/identity development that allows for a range of influences, including cross-gender influences, acknowledging the importance of intersubjectivity and relationality.
More research is needed on men’s care practices and, and on the ways in which their experiences of being cared for shape men’s caring identities and their capacity to care.

17. References
Hamington, M.(2002) ‘A Father’s Touch: Caring Embodiment and a Moral Revolution’, in Tuana, M., Cowling, C., Hamington, M., Johnson, G. and MacMullan, T., Revealing Male Bodies, Bloomington, Indiana University Press Kittay, E.F. (1999), Love’s Labor: Essays on Women, Equality and Dependency, Routledge, New York Kittay, E.F. (2002), ‘When caring is just and justice is caring’, in Kittay, E.F. and Feder, E.K. The Subject of Care: Feminist Perspectives on Dependency, Rowan and Littlefield, Lanham, Maryland

18. For more information
@MartinRobbOU drmartin.robb martinrobb.wordpress.com