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10.12 Thu warm-up: debriefing the released essay (“Wii Girl”)

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Presentation on theme: "10.12 Thu warm-up: debriefing the released essay (“Wii Girl”)"— Presentation transcript:

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2 10.12 Thu warm-up: debriefing the released essay (“Wii Girl”)
activity 1: synthesis notes and self-edit activity 2: Peer edit? Let’s see if we have time close: Triangles and Atticus HW DUE: topic approval form. ON desk with GRAD PAPER CHECKLIST (not HW tracker) HW Tonight: finish bootcamp Upcoming: 10.12/10.13: topic approval form due 10.16/10.17: synth bootcamp due (kid consumers prompt) 10.24/10.25: outline due 10.26/10.27: Synth FRQ (formally scored) 10.31/11.1: vocab. 3 due 11.2/11.3: first rough draft due 11.8/11.9: Grammar 2 (diction) due 11.15/11.16: TY4A pt. 2 due 11.15/11.16: Argumentation mid-unit test 11.17/11.20: vocab. 4 due 5.16: AP Lang test

3 10.12 warm-up: scoring the released essay
Why does Wii Girl open with narration? Where is the Wii Girl’s thesis? Paragraph 2 uses two sources. What connection does Wii Girl make between these two sources? Does paragraph 4 (technically BP2) begin with a fact or an idea (clam) WG have to prove? What purpose does the fifth paragraph (technically BP3) serve? Why, in other words, does she acknowledge that there is a problem with advertising aimed at children? Did you get the allusion at the end of the conclusion? If not, find someone who does understand it and have them explain it to you. Regardless, is it ok to insert humor into these essays? What is the longest quote? Does WG quote and paraphrase from the sources? Does WG use in-text and parenthetical citations? Has WG established her voice or did she merely summarize the sources?

4 10.12 notes: Synthesis basics
Synthesis is “a form of critical thinking highly valued by business, industry and other institutions” (Everything Is an Argument). Your job is to make the information in the sources feel “familiar and natural to you.” You should be looking for connections among the sources. But the sources are only informing your argument. You should have “the dominant and controlling voice in an argument.”

5 10.12 notes: Synthesis basics
Using sources to support and inform your argument. You are not . . . summarizing the sources. dropping quotes in from the sources. analyzing the sources (not in your essay; you have to analyze them to synthesize them though, don’t you?). Your argument for this FRQ is a simple one: You’re developing a position on the ethics of marketing to children. In other words . . . You’re for it or against (because you think it’s ethical or unethical).

6 10.12 notes: Synthesis basics
Intro: Gives basic context Thesis: Clearly answers prompt (indicates your position) Topic sentences: Sub-point of thesis (claims an aspect of your thesis that you intend to prove) BPs: Presents evidence from sources that advance your claims Conclusion: Final chance to appeal to audience (be cautious of merely summarizing what you just said—it’s not like your essay was so long that the audience has forgotten what you already said)

7 10.12 activity: Kid Consumer self edit
PROMPT: Synthesize material from at least three sources and incorporate it into a coherent, well-written essay that develops a position on the ethics of marketing goods and services to children. Identify your claim (or thesis). This claim should specifically answer the prompt. If you don’t think you’ve established your position on the ethics of kid marketing, then you must rewrite. Identify where you used sources (direct quote or paraphrase). You must use at least three. Identify where you cited your sources (citations can be in-text or parenthetical). Identify your direct quotes. If you have a quote longer than ten words, you must cut it down. (Switching to a paraphrase of that quote is not a sufficient workaround.) Identify the topic sentences for your BPs. Are they making claims that you have to prove or simply stating facts? If the latter, revise. Score your essay according to the rubric and write a paragraph justifying the score you gave yourself. NOTE: If you did not use three sources or you did not cite the sources, the highest you can get is a 2. Sorry.

8 10.12 activity: Kid Consumer peer edit
I will partner you up. Read through your peer’s essay and score. Be sure to take notes to justify the score you are giving your peer. (You will be turning these notes in.)

9 10.12 activity: Kid Consumer peer edit

10 10.12 activity: Kid Consumer peer edit
Thesis/claim answers prompt. Minimum three sources. Topic sentences are claims. What does your peer assume about what his audience believes? Are those assumptions reasonable?

11 10.12 post-edit: Atticus’ argument
Create a rhetorical triangle for . . .

12 10.12 close: Atticus’ argument
Who is his audience? (NOTE: Not Harper Lee’s audience. Pretend Atticus is a real person who actually delivered this speech.) How does Atticus appeal to his audience? What is his claim? Is he successful in presenting his claim? What evidence does he use to support his claim? Does he present himself ethically as an unbiased participant? What rhetorical appeals does Atticus use to create his argument? What does his rhetorical triangle look like (and don’t say “like a witch’s hat”). This same basic technique for analyzing an argument will be applied to every argument we look at this unit.

13 CLOSE and HW HW: That CLOSE: : bootcamp portfolio due (50 formal points) Should contain: Original hand-written draft Annotated and scored released essay Self-/peer-edited draft Finalized essay (w/ turnitin.com submission)


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