1. Of all the steps it is whether our couple are in Step 3 or Step 5 that can be the most confusing.
Stage 1: De-escalation of the Negative Cycles of Interaction
Step 3: Accessing the unacknowledged emotions underlying interactional positions.
Stage 2: Changing Interactional Positions
Step 5: Promoting identification with disowned attachment emotions, needs, and aspects of self and integrating these into relationship interactions.
(Johnson, S.M., (2004) The Practice of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy – Creating Connection, 2nd Edition. Brunner-Routledge, New York.)

2. As you watch the videos of working in Step 2 & 3 and in Step 5 - notice differences between them:
Body language
Pace
Interruptions v attentive waiting
Expression of emotion – ‘at’ the other v owned