1. © 2007 McGraw-Hill Higher Education. All rights reserved. Chapter Fourteen Relationships: Connection and Communication

2. © 2007 McGraw-Hill Higher Education. All rights reserved. A Healthy Sense of Self Relationships begin with who you are as an individual and what you bring to the relationship Examples of important attributes are as follows: A reasonably high self-esteem A capacity of empathy The ability both to be alone and to be with others

3. © 2007 McGraw-Hill Higher Education. All rights reserved. Friendship Friendship is a reciprocal relationship based on mutual liking and caring, respect, trust, interest and companionship Friendships are considered long lasting and more stable compared to a romantic relationship Friendships offer psychological and emotional buffers against stress, anxiety and depression

4. © 2007 McGraw-Hill Higher Education. All rights reserved. Characteristics of Successful Partnerships Independence and maturity Good self esteem and mutual respect Good communication Good sexual relationship, open expression of affection and respect Enjoy spending time together in leisure activities Acknowledge strengths and failings, and take responsibility for both Assertive and flexible in wants and needs Able to focus unselfishly on each other Good family and friend relationships Shared spiritual values

5. © 2007 McGraw-Hill Higher Education. All rights reserved. What is Attraction? A systematic screening process when deciding if someone could be a potential partner Factors which promote attraction are: Proximity or familiarity Physical attraction Similar characteristics with values and attitudes Social or economic status Procreation purposes/genetic off-spring concept

6. © 2007 McGraw-Hill Higher Education. All rights reserved. Suggestions for Successful Dating Take things slowly by revealing information about yourself gradually Do not feel the need to become physically involved right away; become friends first Get to know the person’s friends and family members if you can Traits you find bothersome usually become more pronounced as time goes on Be honest about who you are

7. © 2007 McGraw-Hill Higher Education. All rights reserved. Theories of Love Similarity theories are based on the concept that people select mates based on similar personality traits Social Exchange Theory suggests that falling in love and choosing a partner are based on the exchange of ‘commodities’ or fulfilling a ‘need’ Warmth Comfort Care Property/good and services Sternberg’s Love Triangle has 3 dimensions which can produce different kinds of love which could end up as a friendship, infatuation, or companionate love Intimacy Passion Commitment

8. © 2007 McGraw-Hill Higher Education. All rights reserved. Communication Skills People who are good communicators have many personal attributes to contribute to their success One aspect of being an effective communicator is knowing what to say Using “I” statements helps you take responsibility for your own emotions and reactions Saying what you would like to have happen is also more productive than complaining about what isn’t happening When you are the ‘listener’, just do that…Listen!

9. © 2007 McGraw-Hill Higher Education. All rights reserved. Gender Roles Sex refers to a person’s biological status as a male or female Intersex is a condition in which the genitals are ambiguous at birth Gender role is a set of behaviors and activities a person engages in to conform to society’s expectation of his or her sex

10. © 2007 McGraw-Hill Higher Education. All rights reserved. Sexual Orientation Sexual orientation refers to a person’s emotional, romantic, and sexual attraction to a member of the same sex, the other sex, or both Heterosexuality: emotional and sexual attraction to the opposite gender Homosexuality: emotional and sexual attraction to the same gender Bisexuality: emotional and sexual attraction to both genders Transgendered: discomfort towards their own sex and identifying with the other sex Sexual orientation is known to be influenced by a complex interaction of biological, psychological, and societal factors

11. © 2007 McGraw-Hill Higher Education. All rights reserved. Lifestyle Choices Marriage Gay and Lesbian Partnerships Cohabitation Divorce Blended Families Singlehood

12. © 2007 McGraw-Hill Higher Education. All rights reserved. How to Keep Your Relationships Strong and Vital Cohesion is the dynamic balance between separateness and togetherness in both couple and family relationships Relationships are strongest when there is a balance between intimacy and autonomy Flexibility is the dynamic balance between stability and change Communication is the tool that partners and families use to adjust levels of cohesion or flexibility when change is needed

13. © 2007 McGraw-Hill Higher Education. All rights reserved. Chapter Fourteen Relationships: Connection and Communication