Communications for Congregational Leaders Nancy Davidge Associate Program Director and Editor, ECF Vital Practices 2014 Church Leadership Conference: Unlocking the New Church

Bible Study: 1 Samuel 3:1-20 Now the boy Samuel was ministering to the Lord under Eli. Eli, whose eyesight had begun to grow dim so that he could not see, was lying down in his room. Samuel was lying down in the temple…Then the Lord called, “Samuel! Samuel!” and he said “Here I am!” and ran to Eli, and said “Here I am, for you called me.” But he said, “I did not call, my son; lie down again.” The Lord called again…and Samuel again ran to Eli. Then Eli perceived that the Lord was calling the boy and said ‘If he speaks to you again say “Speak Lord for your servant is listening.”… Then the Lord said to Samuel, “See, I am about to do something in Israel that will make both ears of anyone who hears of it tingle. On that day I will fulfill against Eli all that I have spoken concerning his house, from beginning to end. For I have told him that I am about to punish his house forever…..”

Bible Study: 1 Samuel 3:1-20 cont… …for the iniquity that he knew, because his sons were blaspheming God, and he did not restrain them.” Samuel lay there until morning; then he opened the doors of the house of the Lord. Samuel was afraid to tell the vision to Eli. But Eli called Samuel and said.. “What was that he told you? Do not hide it from me…” So Samuel told him everything and hid nothing from him. Then he said, “It is the Lord; let him do what seems good to him.” As Samuel grew up, the Lord was with him and let none of his words fall to the ground. And all Israel from Dan to Beer-sheba knew that Samuel was a trustworthy prophet of the Lord.

If it Were Easy… We wouldn’t need this workshop! Many moving parts Five ‘W’s” and a how Our personalities and egos Time and resource Assumptions What happens if we take short cuts in our eagerness to just do something?

It’s Not Easy….. Share an experience I had last month… What time does the wedding start?

Image #1 Note the time on this invitation. Don’t say anything….

Image #2. Note the time on this invitation. Don’t say anything….

What Time’s the Wedding? Which ‘double u’s’ were neglected here? What’s our take away?

Communicating Effectively is a Skill What is it that makes some communications more effective than others? Often, the focus on message and media (what and how) > audience What areas we are missing that influence how our messages are received?

Danger Will Robinson! “Church leaders have a responsibility to model Christ like behaviors and when we don’t we pay a heavy price.” - Mary MacGregor Anyone have a communications misfire in the last: Week? Month? Quarter? Year?

To Ensure Failure…. What should we be sure to do?

To Ensure Success…. Looking at our lists – What’s the opposite action for each? Looking at those opposite actions, what are the things that would likely lead toward a successful outcome? Take a minute – and jot down your top three…

Communicating Difficult Messages Easy to say…. Harder to do. Three tips: 1.Covenant relationships – offer standards for group behavior. 2.Remember – your message generally will not come as a surprise 3.Create opportunities for practice.

Communicating Change Resistance to change is NORMAL 3 ways to minimize resistance Invite key influencers to be part of process Keep people informed Help people understand why Listen – and be open to hearing…

You helped write a grant for your church and are waiting to hear the result. Today, your neighbor congratulates you on getting the grant. How do you feel? Happy the grant was approved Hurt or angry that as a committee member you didn’t hear the news first A bit of both. Question

Earn Trust by… Five tips for effective communication Create a safe environment Recognize issues of power/control Guard against defensiveness Practice transparency Tell the truth What helps: Covenants or norms Show of hands – who uses them?

When Starting… #1 - Communications is about feelings as well as message. Do a ‘trial run’ asking: Why should anybody care about this? Are there things people care about that we might be missing or minimizing? What would my reaction be to this message as presented?

Before Sending… #2 – Put your self in your audience(s)’ shoes, considering: Audience context Tone Delivery methods Timing Accuracy Ask yourselves – What might we have missed???

Building Relationships… How do we reach members we rarely see and ‘the people we don’t know yet?’ We live in a time when it is very easy for people looking for a spiritual home to find us – and yet many of us hide our light under a bushel basket. How do we invite people who are ‘in the database’ but not actively engaged into a different relationship within the congregation?

Building Relationships Where and how are people likely to learn about what your congregation/church values? Friends and neighbors Your website Information you share via social or traditional media Free directory listings

Sharing our Stories How well are we doing? If I went to your website, would I find: Worship times? Church history? A leadership directory? Any stories? Jesus?

Sharing our Stories FREE Directory listings – Find a Church Faith Street Google PlacesGoogle Places, Yelp, Yellow and White Pages If you only do 1 thing: Claim your places

Building Relationships As we welcome others in – as participants, as members, as leaders – remember this also = change Let’s prepare ourselves by: Being open to doing things differently Sharing power/control Sharing information more widely

Next Steps – Build Trust Consider covenants: Create a safe environment Recognize issues of power/control Guard against defensiveness Practice transparency Tell the truth

Next Steps - Communicating Change Incorporate these practices: Invite key influencers to be part of change/decision making process Keep people informed – schedule regular updates using a variety media (worship, e-news, etc) Help people understand why – share as much of the back story as you can while respecting confidentiality

Impact on Relationships Internally Practices we’ve been talking about help build healthier relationships More open and honest communication Externally Sharing your stories and information helps ‘the people we don’t know yet’ find you

Contact Us Episcopal Church Foundation ECF website: ECF Vital Practices: Phone: (800)

Miguel Angel Escobar Program Director, Leadership Resources Nancy Davidge Associate Program Director, Leadership Resources Brendon Hunter Assistant Program Director, Leadership Resources Contact ECF’s Leadership Resources Team

“How to” Resources ECF Vital Practices Episcopal Communicators Episcopal Church Public Affairs Toolkit