Elements of Style Active and Passive Voice
Embrace the Active Voice Shun the Passive Voice Imagine if the Declaration of Independence started with “These truths are held by us to be self-evident”… Sure, it makes sense, but it sounds terrible! Written in the active voice: “We hold these truths to be self-evident” The statement becomes much more direct and forceful!
Take Ownership! Using active voice does the following: 1. It helps keep your sentences more concise 2. It makes clear who in our sentence is performing the actions 3. It makes those actions more lively and dynamic!
Let’s look at some examples Trash was thrown all over school hallways. This statement makes you think the sentence is about someone throwing trash, when really it is just establishing setting… Trash covered the floors. Direct, to the point, and descriptive
Let’s Try a Few… She felt regret for not going to bed earlier the night before. She regretted not going to bed earlier the night before. The cake and cookies for the bake sale were made by me. I made the cake and cookies for the bake sale.
A Few More…Just for Fun! The bike was bought for his birthday. His mother bought the bike for his birthday. Two more goals were scored. The team scored two more goals.
Your Turn! In groups of 2 or 3, fix the following five sentences: 1. I was stopped by the traffic, and was made late. 2. The hopes of the young boy were crushed when he failed. 3. The painting by Angela has been given first place. 4. Her car was hit yesterday by another car. 5. Bob’s vacation was ended by he first day of school.
Possible Answers 1. I’m late due to traffic. 2. The boy was hoping to pass the class. 3. Angela’s painting won first place. 4. Another car hit her yesterday. 5. The first day of school ended Bob’s vacation.
Is Passive Voice in Your Writing? Tips for Revision Find all of the instances in which you used passive voice in your essayessay. Underline (or highlight) and number your findings.. Then, revise each sentence so that you use the active voice.