News Writing Let’s talk about … By Jeanne Acton, UIL & ILPC Journalism Director and Vicki McCash Brennan, MA, CJE

News Writing … Informative Interesting Factual gives the reader factual information that will affect them or interests them in some way. Informative Interesting Factual

News Writing News provides readers with all of the five W’s and H, usually in the lead or near the top of the story. Leads should begin most often with the what, why or who (if interesting or well-known), NOT with when or where, which are usually the least interesting elements. But where do you go from there?

Let’s talk about news writing structure.

Disadvantages: It can get repetitive. It might discourage you from a more creative lead. It can get bogged down with facts and details. Advantage: It condenses information efficiently, letting readers understand the basics of what happened quickly and easily. Best for breaking news, news briefs, straight-forward stories.

News Writing A better way …. The next structure is a modification of the inverted pyramid that allows for more flexibility and is easy for beginning journalists to use. Use the Transition - Quote (L-Q-T-Q) model for most of your work in journalism.

HANDOUT of this is available. Starts just like the inverted pyramid HANDOUT of this is available. Starts just like the inverted pyramid. The twist comes by insisting that students use quotes high up. They build their stories on the quotes. HANDOUT will help students, as this slide is hard to see. An easier and more detailed format for students to use.

Another model: Modified Inverted Pyramid Also called “the hourglass” or “the martini glass.” Starts with a summary of the event and key facts. Transitions to a narrative or chronological format. Works best for crime or disaster stories when you need to tell what happened from beginning to end.

Another model: The Wall Street Journal format Also called “the kabob” or “the circle” Starts with an anecdote about someone who is affected by a trend, issue or event. Uses a “nut graph” or summary paragraph right after the anecdote to tell the five W’s and H. Continues with details and quotes. Ends with a closing anecdote about the same person who is in the lead. Best used for feature writing or follow-up news stories.

For beginning newswriting, it’s best to master the L-Q-T-Q formula first. So let’s explore that one … Remind students that they already know about the 5W’s and how to write a summary lead. This formula starts there. But then, it is built on the quotes and transitions between the quotes. Let them refer to their handout …

Let’s talk about Direct Quotes

Direct Quotes Quotes should be linked to the paragraph before them. The quote should elaborate on the previous paragraph. For example: After long-time school nurse Emma Stilten died in a car accident in December, part-time teacher aide Betty Figgs covered Stilten’s responsibilities. Impressed with Figgs’ competence, Principal Stella Reeves proposed keeping Figgs instead of hiring a new nurse. With the savings, Reeves wants to hire a new teacher — a move supported by teachers. “I thought the parents would jump on board with this proposal,” Reeves said. “It will decrease our class sizes and benefit students directly.” Note that the quote in the example expands the concept to parents being happy about the move, not just teachers.

What comes next? A transition paragraph, adding details. Parent Raquel Simones said the school should not compromise student safety simply to give teachers a few less papers to grade. What comes next? From whom?

Another direct quote elaborates on previous transition Parent Raquel Simones said the school should not compromise student safety simply to give teachers a few less papers to grade. “I have a special needs child who is quite fragile,” Simones said. “If he suffers a seizure at school, I want a certified nurse to help him.” To help with organization, stick with the same person talking until you are finished with that person, then go on to the next speaker. The writer continued with the same speaker. That helps with organization. What follows this?

More transitions and quotes (Each quote is linked with a transition above and below it.) Junior GiGi Smith said she also believes the school needs a full-time, certified nurse. Her brother, who will be a freshman next year, has a severe peanut allergy. “A nurse is trained to deal with this medical condition,” Smith said. “A teacher’s aide isn’t. I like Ms. Figgs, but she could panic. That would be very bad for my brother.”

Direct Quotes Should not repeat the transition before them. For example: Figgs said most of her job is distributing prescribed medicine to students. “Most of what I do is distribute medicine to students,” she said. This is called a “stutter quote.” AVOID THIS!

Direct Quotes Quotes can be longer than one sentence. Put the attribution after the first sentence of the quote. (In other words, break the quote in half with the attribution in the middle.) Attribution should be: Noun then verb. For example: Correct - senior Bob Rodriguez said. Incorrect - said senior Bob Rodriguez. (unless you have an unusually long title) Do not place two people’s direct quotes next to each other without a transition.

Direct Quotes Add emotion, opinions and life to your story. Listen for quotes that tell you how people feel or think about the subject. Don’t quote people on dry, basic facts or description that you can observe with your own eyes. Use facts and description in your transitions.

Let’s talk about Transitions Transitions make the story flow.

Transitions … ARE VERY IMPORTANT. Hold the story together. Link the paragraphs, building bridges of understanding for your readers. Provide organization and flow. Help create voice. And in news writing, they’re really not too difficult!

Hierarchy of Transitions Basic transition words (Good) First, next, then Transitional phrases (Better) For one thing For instance Internal transitions (Best. Go for these!) Seamless wording embedded within text Use facts, partial quotes and indirect quotes to create these.

Transitions in news writing Can be fact, indirect quote or a partial quote. For example: FACT TRANSITION After long-time school nurse Ema Stilten died in a car accident in December, part-time teacher aide Betty Figgs covered Stilten’s responsibilities. Impressed with Figgs’ competence, Reeves proposed keeping Figgs to avoid hiring a new nurse. With the savings, Reeves wants to hire a new teacher — a move supported by teachers.

Transitions For example: INDIRECT QUOTE TRANSITION Can be fact, indirect quote or a partial quote. For example: INDIRECT QUOTE TRANSITION Parent Raquel Simones said the school should not compromise student safety simply to give teachers fewer papers to grade.

Transitions For example: PARTIAL QUOTE TRANSITION Can be fact, indirect quote or a partial quote. For example: PARTIAL QUOTE TRANSITION Reeves said Figgs has done “an outstanding job” since she took over in the nurse’s office.

Transitions For example: Use transitional words to help with the flow as needed. Transitional words include after all, also, finally, in addition, however, otherwise, then. For example: In addition to cutting the nursing position, Reeves suggested decreasing the number of bus routes.

To find a transition, look for a connection. Transitions Can show: Time Place Reasons Surprise (a twist) Contrasts Other connections To find a transition, look for a connection.

Transitions Time transitions Place transitions Contrasts Reasons Afterwards, beforehand, later, soon, meanwhile Place transitions In the room, at the beach, down the hall Contrasts Nevertheless, even though, although Reasons Because of, instead of Connections Repeat a key word, concept or phrase from the previous sentence or paragraph. This is what using partial quotes or indirect quotes can do for you.

Transitions The transitions are in your notebook! Quotes and facts are good for more than just stringing together and calling it a day … Use parts of the direct quotes to create the transition. And then use the rest of the quote as the direct quote.

For example “I never imagined this would become a permanent solution, but Betty Figgs is doing an excellent job balancing both the classroom and nurse’s office,” Reeves said. “She is very organized and handles all issues professionally and efficiently. We have not received a single complaint about the change. “It actually wasn’t my idea to continue with this plan. It was Ms. Figgs. She loves the additional duties and feels more than competent to continue next year. Ms. Figgs raised six children, so she knows a little about sick teenagers. Plus, she agreed to seek additional training this summer.” The school has not received a single complaint about Figgs since she took over the nurse’s job, Reeves said. “She is very organized and handles all issues professionally and efficiently,” Reeves said. “Plus, she agreed to additional training this summer.” The Transition The first part at top is a run-on quote, probably transcribed from a tape, because it’s so long. It is TOO MUCH. Encourage students to break these things up into smaller, more concise bits. Point out how the direct quote after the transition pulls from different parts of her quote. That’s OK to do, as long as you don’t change the meaning by rearranging the order in which something was said. Direct Quote

ENDINGS Save a summary quote or a well-said phrase to end with. This is called a “kicker quote.” DO NOT, under any circumstances, fall back on your essay training and write your own summary conclusion. This is editorializing and it has no place in news writing. Avoid ending with a cliché, such as “That’s all, folks.” End with a bang. Save the powerful quote or phrase for last.

Let’s Review … Following a transition, what should a direct quote do? What types of leads should you use more? Where should you place the attribution for a direct quote? What can a transition be? THIS WILL BE THE ENDING SLIDE FOR THE DAY ONE PRESENTATION. BEGIN DAY TWO HERE. Types of leads: What, why, maybe who if who is well-known or interesting, not when or where. Attribution goes after the firs sentence of a quote. A direct quote after a transition should elaborate on the information in the transition, providing emotion or opinion. Direct quotes can be more than one sentence, but don’t just string a whole bunch of quotes together. Transitions can be facts, partial quotes or indirect quotes. Transitions build connections, assist with story flow, hold the story together. Use transition words or parts of quotes to create transitions. What is the purpose of the transition? How many sentences can a direct quote be? What can you use to create transitions?

No-Nos for News Stories Using the name of your school or town. Your readers know where they are. Starting with “The School Board …” or some other boring “who.” Adding facts for which you have no source or making things up because you think that’s right. Putting attribution before the quote. Missing the news peg. Missing important information and people. Stacking quotes. Use transitions between each quote! Forgetting to use student quotes. Ending with your own summary.

Checklist for News Stories Are the most important and recent facts first? Is the story accurate? Are the sources identified fully? Are the paragraphs short? Is the sentence structure varied in the story? Is the story neat and double-spaced so that it is easy to read? Does your story flow? Did you use the transition/quote (L-Q-T-Q) formula? Did you use active voice?

Pitfalls to Avoid ** Editorializing. Keep your opinion out of the story Using first and second person. Keep yourself out of the story. Common error: “our school.” No personal pronouns! Messy handwriting, poor grammar and spelling. Paragraphs too long. Use only one thought or idea per paragraph. New paragraph for each transition and each speaker. Misspelling names. Trying to use all of the information and quotes you have. Be judicious. ** How to get an D/F or lose a competition …

What will make the difference? ** Use the L-Q-T-Q formula. Get the news peg in the lead. Use the L-Q-T-Q formula. Use the right sources and strong quotes. ** How to get an A or win a competition …

Presentation can end here. Next slide provides critique practice.

What went wrong with this? At Leaguetown High School about 35 students skipped at least one period each school day. The assistant principals said many of the skippers hide in bathrooms, outside the school or in their cars. To reduce truancy, all students will receive new school IDs with built-in tracking devices on April 2, but one parent is working with the American Civil Liberties Union to stop the use of such devices. “This is a blatant violation of my son’s privacy rights,” said parent Don Cantrell. “He doesn’t want someone watching him at all times. No child in the United States should be tagged or tracked.” But Strobinski, who proposed the new IDs, doesn’t understand the concerns. She said, “We will never use the tracking device on them [students] unless they are skipping class or there is an emergency of some type. Plus, the tracking only works at the school.” With the new IDs, administrators will be able to track our students for a range of 200 yards from the principal’s office. “Students will be less likely to skip if they know we can find them quite easily,” Strubinski said. “Students should not have any concerns if they don’t skip class.” “Students who have never skipped should not have to wear such an ID,” sophmore Johnny Rains said. This is an optional assignment. Can be use with experienced students for review Lead not most recent info. News peg in second paragraph. Lead begins with school name, a boring “who” and focuses on “when.” Need full ID of Brown. Quote attribution: parent Don Cantrell said. Quote attribution: paragraph begins with “she said.” Stacked quotes in last two paragraphs “Our” in the lead Sophomore misspelled