“LOVE IS?” Mary Chute, Assistant Director Archdiocese of Washington Center for Deaf Ministries Teen Club ─ February 15, 2005

Am I really “in love?” “Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or proud, love is not rude or selfish or grumpy. Love does not keep a record of others mistakes, love is not happy with evil, but is happy with the truth. Love never gives up; and its faith hope and patience never fails.” - St. Paul

Patience What does this picture make you think of? Patience puts up with unpleasant things. It takes the good and the bad. It accepts a friends faults as well as their good qualities. Does love demand that we should put up with everything? If a friend is constantly late, should we stay quiet and put up with it, or say something in a kind way? If a friend wants us to behave in a way that is not comfortable, should we?

Sharing How does this boy feel about the girl? How does she feel about him? What is the feeling they share? What does sharing involve? Can love be one-sided? Is there a true friendship when one person does all the inviting and IMing? Why do both people have to care?

Many friends! Good friendships allow other friends! There are times we like to talk quietly with a close friend one on one- and that is fine. But what about the friend who wants ALL our time, or asks us to drop other friends or interests (hobbies)? What does jealousy and possessiveness do to love? Why does love call for many different friends in addition to our best friends?

Pride/Conceit Should a loving person make themselves attractive to other people? What is the difference between a healthy (good) liking of self and conceit? Do conceited people really love themselves? Can we love others if we do not love ourselves?

Condescending/ Patronizing What does it mean to be condescending? Why might the tall player be condescending to a short player? Could the shorter player also have a condescending attitude? (reverse discrimination) Can there be true friendship when people are always trying to prove they are better?

A little thanks goes a long way! Does a thank you note have anything to do with love? Is a thank you note just good manners? Do manners themselves show love? How? Who should we be well mannered with?

Love is not quick to anger…. Suppose someone calls your friend a terrible name. Should you prove your love for your friend by slugging them? Suppose your best friend hurts your feelings. Do you snap back quickly with a nasty reply? What should you do? If you loose your temper easily, is that a problem?

Love does not count its hurts…. What can holding a grudge do to a friendship? How have we hurt others? Should we learn to forgive and forget? Suppose you have been left out of a party; on purpose. What do you do? How can you forgive someone who has hurt you on purpose?

Love is more than fair… Suppose two friends have ONE ticket to the MCI Center for the next Wizards game. There is no money for a second ticket. Who will get the free ticket? You could draw straws… But love is more than fair. What more might love do?

Love believes… What do faith and trust have to do with love? Can a new friendship begin without trusting that person? Can we know for sure this friendship is worth having? And the other way around? What about old friends? Do we always have to show we trust and have faith in old friendships? How does faith help us continue to grow?

We are human…not too perfect.. Sometimes a new friend disappoints us. Or we disappoint a new friend. Sometimes old friendships break up too.. So what do we do? Can we learn from these experiences? Return to sender

But love keeps on trying. What if your valentine does not send YOU a card? (or even LOOK at you all day long!!) What is the loving attitude we should have for that person? Can love be limited to one person? Why does true love never give up?

What does God say? An early Valentine to share with others. "For God so loved the world, That He gave His only Begotten Son so that everyone who Believes in Him might not perish, But might have eternal life." John 3:16

Are boyfriends/girlfriends OK with God? Yes. God rejoices in love. God knows we grow in love by experiencing love. God asks us to be respectful to: Ourselves; Others; and His Law.

Stay Tuned for our March Teen Club! What is Christian dating? What does God say about dating? What does God say about love and sex? Not sure??? Come next time!