Jewish Marriage as a rite of passage

Time Tenakh ages for marriage overridden by Australian civil law. Can take place on any day except the Shabbat and festivals.

Time Most Jewish weddings take place on a Sunday. Tuesday is considered a lucky day because in the creation story God said “it was good” twice.

Place May take place inside a synagogue or outside. It always takes place under a chuppah (a canopy)

Indoors in the synagogue or outdoors Under the Chuppah

Inside or

outside

The Chuppah may be simple

Often the Chuppah is elaborately decorated and supported by four poles covered in flowers.

The participants kallah (bride) chassan (groom) Friends and family rabbi (officiates) God is present

A rabbi usually officiates Though it can be any observant Jew sufficiently familiar with the requirements, because marriage, under Jewish law, Is essentially a private contractual agreement between a man and a woman.

In Judaism marriage is the ideal human state. rated very highly. seen as the way to emotional and spiritual fulfilment. desirable for both man and woman. The Charter

Sacred writings related to the Jewish marriage rite Marriage is to be encouraged because ‘it is not good that a man should be alone’ (Gen 2:18) and The Charter

Sacred writings related to the Jewish marriage rite Rabbi’s strongly advocate marriage arguing that ‘he who has no wife is not a proper man’ (B.Yeb. 62b). The Charter

Marriage is considered To be the basic social institutional in Judaism. Judaism presents the woman as the home-builder. The Charter

The sanctification of the home is expressed in the woman’s special mitzvah, the mikveh, and all the food laws which the woman has to maintain. The Charter

Marriage can provide Physical fulfilment in the form of sexual expression. When Orthodox Judaism speaks of a sexual relationship it means marriage. The Charter

The Hebrew word for marriage Kiddushin (sanctification) expresses its sanctity. marriage is not only a sacred relationship, but the sacred relationship. The Charter

The Set Form in Jewish Marriage

Two weeks before the Orthodox wedding the groom must obtain a Ketubah. Set Form – pre-liminal

The couple are required to meet the Rabbi a number of times before they marry, so he can offer advice about the meaning of marriage. Set Form – pre-liminal

There is also a meeting between the bride and the rabbi’s wife who will explain what is expected of each partner in a marriage. Set Form – pre-liminal

A few days prior to the wedding the bride will visit the mikveh to immerse herself as required by the Torah. Set Form – pre-liminal

On the Shabbat before the wedding The groom is called to the reading of the Torah. People throw nuts and raisins or sweets on him as a symbol of a sweet life. Set Form – pre-liminal

In Orthodox Judaism On the day of the wedding The couple fast before the ceremony, as they prepare for a solemn as well as a joyful occasion. Set Form – pre-liminal

The men, including the ushers, arrive first. This is known as the groom’s Tish – the time when the groom, ushers and male family members gather for song and prayers before the ceremony. Set Form – pre-liminal

The veiling of the bride Carried out immediately before the processional of the bride, groom and attendants. It takes place in another room while guests are being seated. Set Form – pre-liminal

The veiling of the bride A veil is placed over the brides eyes. It is based on story of Jacob in Genesis 29. Veiling the wife is a symbol of the groom’s commitment to clothe and protect his wife. Set Form – pre-liminal

Sometimes it is simply a lifting of the veil before the ceremony by the groom to check who is behind the veil. Set Form – pre-liminal

Liminal – The ceremony the bridegroom is escorted to the chuppah by the fathers of the bride and groom. The groom may already be present under the chuppah before the ceremony begins,

Liminal – The ceremony Or he may march down the aisle with his parents, followed by the bride and her parents. If the groom is already under the chuppah then: Set Form – liminal

The bride is escorted by either her parents or both mothers (or sometimes by her father) The bride stands on the groom’s right. Set Form – liminal

The bride and groom are escorted because Adam and Eve were escorted by angels to their wedding. Set Form – liminal

During the ceremony The escorts carry candles, since Jewish custom associates light with joy. (Esther 8:16) Set Form – liminal

Once under the chuppah The couple stand facing the rabbi or official conducting this part of the ceremony. Forming a square, the fathers of the couple stand on the groom’s left and the mothers on the bride’s right. Set Form – liminal

The Bride then circles the groom seven times to show this is the man she wishes to marry. Set Form – liminal

The number seven corresponds with the seven times in the Tenakh where it is written “when a man takes a wife.’ Set Form – liminal

The action also represents the role the wife will play in creating an all- embracing, religious warmth within the home. Set Form – liminal

The initial blessings are recited over wine as both partners drink from a single cup as a symbol of the shared joy and gladness over the marriage itself. Set Form – liminal

Giving of the ring Groom places a wedding ring on the forefinger of the right hand where it can be displayed most clearly to the two witnesses. Set Form – liminal

The ring is later transferred to the finger usually used in the country of the wedding. Set Form – liminal

On giving the ring The groom says the words of consecration “Behold, thou art consecrated to me by this ring, according to the Law of Moses and of Israel.” Set Form – liminal

The ring is a symbol of eternity. Set Form – liminal

In Orthodox congregations The groom does not receive a ring. Conservative congregations follow the Orthodox form, but it is usual for the bride at this point to give the groom a ring. Set Form – liminal

In many reform congregations Both the bride and groom recite the English words, “With this ring I thee wed.” The words of both formulas constitutes the vows of Jewish marriage. Set Form – liminal

The couple are now set apart from others for each other. A lifelong commitment is implied, but Judaism does not believe that people can promise this in vows. Set Form – liminal

Next the ceremony focuses on the marriage contract The person conducting the wedding reads out the Ketubah in Aramaic and often gives an English summary. Set Form – liminal

In the presence of two witnesses The groom accepts the ketubah by taking hold of a handkerchief given to him by the officiating rabbi. Set Form – liminal

The signed ketubah is Presented to the bride. Set Form – liminal

In some Orthodox communities The groom reads and agrees to the ketubah before the ceremony begins.

In Conservative Judaism Both the bride and groom often sign a simple marriage certificate, a practice that is followed in all reform congregations. Set Form – liminal

The marriage closes As it began with blessings recited over a cup of wine. Both partners drink from this second cup, again symbolising their resolve to share everything during their life together. Set Form – liminal

This is followed By the recitation of seven blessings, praising God for the creation of all things, of Man, and of man and woman in His image. Not only the story of creation, but also the history of Israel and its future hopes are echoed. Set Form – liminal

The recitation ends with ‘Blessed are you, O Lord, who gladdens the bridegroom with the bride’.

The bridegroom then Crushes a glass with his shoe to the shouts of Mazel Tov From the guests – Mazel Tov meaning ‘congratulations’ and ‘good luck’. Set Form – liminal

In Orthodoxy The breaking glass is a reminder of the destruction of the Temple, Set Form – liminal

Whilst in other congregations it is a more general reminder of life’s fragility and sadness. It also symbolises that the act of marriage cannot be undone. Set Form – liminal

Sometimes the couple Are left in a private room (yichud) for a brief period immediately after the ceremony. This signifying their new status as husband and wife. Set Form – post-liminal

Yichud means “togetherness alone” and is a mitzvah in the Orthodox tradition. Here they break the fast with a small meal before joining the celebrations. Set Form – post-liminal

A celebratory meal, the reception or Wedding feast is held after the wedding for the couple and their guests. Set Form – post-liminal

The reception is usually a lavish dinner where the guests and relatives participate in the mitzvah of celebrating in joy with the bride and groom. Set Form – post-liminal

To show this joy and how special the couple are the bride and groom are carried on the shoulders of the guests. Set Form – post-liminal

In Orthodox communities It is likely that men and women will have separate dancing during the event with strictly Jewish music. Set Form – post-liminal

While other variants Allow mixed dancing with a mixture of different sounds including Jewish music. Set Form – post-liminal

The meal itself is usually kosher in Orthodox marriages, however all variants may cater for both kosher and non-kosher meals depending on the variety of guests. Set Form – post-liminal

The reception The meal concludes with grace and a repetition of the seven marriage blessings. Set Form – post-liminal

Traditionally a celebratory meal is held in a different home for each of the seven nights following the wedding. Set Form – post-liminal

The seven blessings from the wedding ceremony are also recited at the end of of each of these meals. The couple are welcomed as full married members of the faith community. Set Form – post-liminal